Health anxiety.: I am so fed up with this... - Anxiety Support

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Health anxiety.

illaeskrilla profile image
18 Replies

I am so fed up with this.

every little symptom I have I freak out and get a panic attack, I just feel so awful right now. Ive cried all day yesterday and all tonight. I took an ativan and I was still worried but kept me from freaking out. I just cant stop crying. My therapist is retiring so Its going to take a while before I can get a new therapist I have no one to talk to about how im feeling and I just cant handle this anymore Ive been having serious thoughts about just admitting myself to the psych ward cause I feel like I need help ASAP. I am so tired of feeling scared all the time. I dont know what to do anymore. the breathing techniques are not working, ativan isnt working, I try and relax but I just cant. I feel so alone and scared My husband works all day so im home with my daughter til11pm I have no friends, no family I can call. I just need help and no one is here to help me. I dont know what to do anymore.

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illaeskrilla profile image
illaeskrilla
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18 Replies

Hi illaeskrilla.

So sorry to hear your are having a hard time.I understand just how you feel, could you not go and see your GP again and request a different medication.I don't think.admitting yourself to hospital is the way to go as it would cause you more upset worrying about your daughter, you know there is always someone on here that will listen to you and possibly give you advice. You are not alone.

Take care Kenny

GlobalJ3 profile image
GlobalJ3

Hi illaeskrilla,

I also suffer with health anxiety and have done now for a couple of years, how long have you had these symptoms? I started out having a panic attack about 3 years ago, which then slowly but surely led to anxiety all the time, and then led to health anxiety.. which i do still have now but, after a while, - trust me - you learn to control it, and you learn to live with it, and as soon as you start to control it, the less it becomes a problem. I too have considered - in the past - admitted my self to some kind of psychiatric ward because I was convinced I wasn't in control enough and thought I was going mad. Believe me - as long as you're sane enough to question your mental health - You haven't gone mad.

Tell me more about your Health Anxiety, what symptoms exactly?? As somebody who has been through the worst of this, I may be able to give you bits & pieces of advice. With me, it was every headache... 2 minutes later was a brain tumor..2 minutes later developed into a panic attack. That sort of thing. Let me know how long and what symptoms you're getting.

Take Care,

GlobalJ3

belcherbob12 profile image
belcherbob12 in reply toGlobalJ3

hi,ive suffered from panic attacks since i was 17,,i am now 47,,ive probably had every concievable symptom of anxiety during that time,,,,ive been hospitalised at 20 years old, for 10 weeks,and ive had most anti depressants,,however there is a something you can try for your anxiety,because its the only thing that has helped me.and it took me 25 years to figure it out,,and its quite simple,,,the secret is CAFFEINE]stop taking anything that contains caffeine,use decaffinated coffee or tea,and i guarantee in a few weeks your panic attacks will lessen a lot,,nothing worse than a powerful stimulant like caffeine for panic attacks..good luck

illaeskrilla profile image
illaeskrilla in reply toGlobalJ3

Idk I'm just really paranoid about blood clot. First I was having headaches and thought it was an anerysm . I got a ct scan and there was nothing then I was feeling chest pains and phlegm thought I had a blood clot in my lungs I had a chest xray and nothing. My legs are always cramping and I'm having a lot of unexplained bruising and again I'm thinking blood clot. I try to not think of all of this but I can't help it. There's always something new. I had a rash last night and itchy skin I automatically thoighy , bacterial infection. And freaked out.

GlobalJ3 profile image
GlobalJ3

You sound exaclty like me last year!! Like.. EXACTLY though.. I promise you.. The fact that you have even made this post on this anxiety forums proves that you are fully aware that it's all anxiety and you haven't actually got these ridiculous diseases/clots etc...

If it's not one thing.. it's another. If it wasn't a headache being a brain tumor, it was my stomach pains being bowel cancer. If it wasn't twitching in my arms & legs being the moment before a stroke, it was my heart beating SLIGHTLY too fast being some kind of heart issue. Believe me, when you'v "self-diagnosed" yourself as many health problem's as I have, you'll look at them and admit... "Yea, this is definitely just anxiety..." .. So, knowing for a fact its Anxiety helps you when you're feeling these symptoms.

Now, a good piece of advice that helped me immensely.. is.. keep a diary.... Of everything.... Every day. Keep note of: What physical symptoms you have, what you THINK them symptoms might be, what you'v typed into google to try and diagnose yourself with, what you've eat & drank, where you've been, who you've spoken to, what certain things have made you feel, make notes of when you felt OK.. everything, and I mean, everything. Making the note of everything will benefit you in the near future when you can look back on it and be happy that "that headache has gone now...." or ".. I don't seem to be getting that problem anymore, and there's me fret'n!"

I couldn't sleep as night with some of the things I thought I had.. I'd be sitting on a bus with a bit of a heart palpitation, and my mind will put together this ridiculous false jigsaw of doom. I begin to think about my family and friends and how they would react when they hear about my death, and then I begin to think about death and what the point is and... before you know it, my palms are sweating, I'm having a hot flush, I'm shaking, panicking... and then I have to get off the bus. I mean - I could go on for quite a while with stories of health anxiety but as long as you can relate to one, you can relate to them all.. and just hearing somebody else tell their story help's you a lot because you're aware that you're not alone.

Keep a diary. A very detailed one. I still keep mine now. Reading back at it makes me feel relief. I wouldn't suggest any medication myself, - I never taken any - .. but, the doctor tried to but I refused every time. You can get over this and be happy again, It just takes a bit of time.. Keep your mind occupied as well. Health Anxious people's mind's tend to search for problems when you're not busy. When you're busy, anxiety's the last thing on your mind.

Anyway, I'm probably rambling a bit here but I hope I've helped!

Take care,

GlobalJ

illaeskrilla profile image
illaeskrilla in reply toGlobalJ3

Thank you for this, that is exactly how I feel thinking I'm in my moment of death and then thinking of my family and how my husband will feel. I get the hot flush through my body and the sweaty palms every time I feel any little pain on my body that scares me. most of the time I don't feel reassured that its all anxiety. :/

GlobalJ3 profile image
GlobalJ3 in reply toillaeskrilla

Hang in there. Exersize is a good way to relieve the anxiety as well by the way.. The amount of blood tests, scan's & just visit's to the doctor's I've had in border-line abuse of the NHS!! And not once.. not once has their been ANYTHING wrong with me. At all. Trust me, you will be fine.. If you have any questions or anything, don't hesitate to ask me. I'm not some kind of.. expert or anything but It's nice to be assured by somebody who's been through what you've been through.

GlobalJ

AnxiousGal profile image
AnxiousGal

I feel the same way. I have OCD and really bad anxiety. health anxiety is a bitch I suffered from it for a long time. I was wondering when u think u have a disease do you see signs everywhere? like u have anxiety about HIV and u start seeing signs on TV about testing, shows are making jokes about it and it's like the world is giving u a sign that u really have it? bc that's what I'm going through now. I just wanted to know if ur seeing signs everywhere too?

illaeskrilla profile image
illaeskrilla in reply toAnxiousGal

You know what, yes I see stuff everywhere and I think I'm just crazy sometimes:(

AnxiousGal profile image
AnxiousGal in reply toillaeskrilla

That's what I'm going through right now. Bc of my health anxiety and OCD I just can't get this disease out of my head. I'm crippling myself to do anything, to be around anyone. I feel paralyzed.

larissa profile image
larissa in reply toAnxiousGal

I have OCD and health anxiety. I always think I have cancer when I get a symptom and imagine dying. I've cried before ,thinking of leaving everyone behind.Can't Google anymore cause it makes me worse! A few months back I got in such a state I ended up hysterical and shaking ect in a and e and only diazepan would calm me down. I think I had a breakdown.Waiting for CBT hoping it will help but had this since about 10 ,now42 xx

Bramwell profile image
Bramwell

I'm the same.

I can't watch any TV programme fact or fiction of anything medical as it starts me off worrying. The same with newspapers and magazines.

I've had HA off and on for much of my adult life - it's a real frightening thing to suffer from.

maggiej profile image
maggiej

I too have health anxiety - I am going through a really bad patch at the moment & I'm desperately clinging to the thought that I've got through it before so I can get through it again. But HA & panic are so destructive & insidious that I keep thinking - what if it isn't anxiety & panic this time, what if this time it's the real thing? I've been anxious all my life & I'm now 64. My first panic attack was when I was in the cinema watching the Beatles' film Help! that's how long I've been like this! However,before you think that isn't very helpful & hopeful for you now, remember that I'm still here writing this all these years later.

During following years I've had occasional outbreaks but on the whole I've been ok, but for the past 3 years or so they have been plaguing me more & more, to the point where I have been thinking that I can't go on any more. I am so terrified of dying but just as terrified of living with panic just around the corner. There's a lyric to a song - 'too tired to live, too scared to die' - that's exactly how I feel, (I can't remember the title, but if it comes back to me I will post it).

My GP is wonderful & always tells me to be kinder to myself as I've had rheumatoid arthritis since the age of 18, so have had years of the stress of pain & the debilitating symptoms that comes with it. My husband, who was totally unsympathetic about the HA & RA, left me for another woman when I was 42, leaving me with 3 children. I worked until I was forced to take ill-health retirement at 54, leaving me with little money to cover all the out-goings. 7 years ago the last of my children to leave home left & as they have lives & responsibilities of their own I don't expect them to look after me, so don't tell them how bad I'm feeling. My mum is 88, so I don't tell her either & try to help & care for her as best I can. I have friends but I don't tell them either, I don't want to put them off with moaning. They do know a bit as I have to explain why I can't go out with them when they ask me.

I have now written so much I can't remember why I started!

Over the years I have had counselling, anxiety management classes and CBT, all have been helpful in the short-term FOR ME, I must stress that because we are all different. Self-help books & websites are also helpful, so please give them all a try. It comes back for me though & I have this desperate need to know WHY? I feel that if I knew why I could learn to stop it or at least cope with it. In pursuit of this I am going to try hypnotherapy this week & I'll let you know my verdict at a later date. I think my purpose in writing this is to say 'you are not alone'. I hope my story tells you that a stressful life is an anxious life & are there any ways you can reduce your stress or manage it better? But I don't want to be patronising, I obviously don't practise what I preach or I wouldn't be on this site. Try to bear in mind that there are many of us who understand you & feel like you do & even if this doesn't stop anxiety & panic, I usually find it a comfort. You are not odd or mad, you have a recognised medical condition which needs treatment just like any other. Good luck. X

Temstarx profile image
Temstarx

I'm going through the same thing ATM it's so scary I wouldn't wish it on no one it's so draining having to tell your self you're ok every minute of the day in currently laying down feeling like I'm on a boat and muggy headed its so scary, I tried counselling but the only person that's going to help u is yourself , maybe you need to change your lifestyle and take it easy abit more

abzisfabz profile image
abzisfabz

I wish I could give you advice as I suffer severe health anxiety too, but unfortunately I can't because I have no way of dealing with it either. I just hope you can find some comfort in talking to people who understand like us, I know how frustrating it is because nobody realises how terrifying it is and how very real the fears are, people just think it sounds silly. I am terrified that I'm either gonna die or that there's something severely wrong with me that the doctors haven't picked up on. And I know that sometimes you can think oh yes it's just anxiety but most of the time like me it's like well what if it isn't this time? What if there's actually something wrong and I'm just being told or telling myself it's just anxiety?

I wouldn't wish this on anyone it is the most terrifying and exhausting illness I've ever known and I've had it for about eight years with no resolution. I hope you find something that helps you, just know you're not alone! Xx

nothingwrong profile image
nothingwrong

Hi , I have ha. At the moment my wisdom teeth are playing up and I have that big lump feeling in my throat( globus ?) So obviously my mind is freaking me out thinking I have mouth / throat cancer x

moises602 profile image
moises602

Hey dont give up i know what your going through last week i been to 5 e.r and two sych and a therapist honestly felt like i was hopeless but it past i still feel anxiety u know but u can message me me if u need to talk ...blessings

Nsommer0525 profile image
Nsommer0525

Hi I'm new to this and new to anxiety..... I had a very bad case of walking pneumonia at the end of March that carries on for 2 months I was miserable ... I was sent to a cardiologist for palps a pulmonologist for breathing..... Etc.... I have been to the ER 3 times in the past 3 months for racing heart which I know now were most likely panic attacks .... I have trouble getting in the shower because an attack happens there as well as my bedroom I sleep in the living room I hate being in my own home .... I'm scared to be alone or alone with my kids due to my husband working a second job on the weekends..... I have had the lightheadedness leg cramps weakness vision issues etc.... A recent visit to my cardiologist for the results of my echo revealed that I have a leaky valve which he said was benign and assured me that my heart was healthy well to tell an anxious person that just opened a whole new can of worms oMg..... I'm not comfortable in my own skin ... I feel like I'm just going through the motions of everyday.... I fought my doc on taking meds for 2 months I finally gave in today and started on 5 mg of lexapro as a short term tx hopefully ... I won't even take a Tylenol for a headache so this was a huge step for me...... I just wasn't functioning tried massage chiropractic all just temporary reliefs.... I need my life back and I'm still so very scared.....

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