Hardest thing in my life: Really... - Anxiety and Depre...

Anxiety and Depression Support

88,479 members82,930 posts

Hardest thing in my life

delta50 profile image
10 Replies

Really struggling with this ativan taper. I'm so angry having to go through this at all. I should have never been prescribed this drug. It has done nothing but harm me. I've been through a few rough patches in my 50 years but this is by far the hardest. I haven't even stopped the taper yet as my psychiatrist prefers I wait until the Pristiq levels are up. I just want to be done with it and move on!! I don't want to rant. Does anyone relate?

Written by
delta50 profile image
delta50
To view profiles and participate in discussions please or .
Read more about...
10 Replies
Agora1 profile image
Agora1

delta50 I can so relate...tapering off any benzo can be grueling both mentally and

physically. The thing is to not give up since you are going in the right direction (freedom

of Ativan)

Keeping your mind busy with positive things around you so that you are NOT focused

just on your tapering will help. Each day is one day closer to feeling like yourself again.

Don't give up, it's not worth giving Ativan control again. I support you and understand. :) xx

delta50 profile image
delta50 in reply to Agora1

Thank you for your support Agora1. I am having interdose withdrawal symptoms, getting harder not focusing on the taper and I took a leave of absence from my job because I'm so stressed out. So many things going on in my life and simplifying seems impossible right now. So grateful for my husband who has been a great support through first my GAD and panic disorder diagnoses and now ativan withdrawal.

Agora1 profile image
Agora1 in reply to delta50

delta50, you are very fortunate in having your husband's support.

It is probably one of the most difficult things I've ever had to do but so well

worth it in the end.

As the brain tries to readjust to the lowering effects of the drug, symptoms do

break through. Once you get an even balance of the medication give you to replace

Ativan, it will help.

Ativan was difficult for me to get off of as well as having had Xanax dependency for

years prior.

Wishing you well and know that I am always here for you. :) xx

Raggedy-Ann profile image
Raggedy-Ann

Hi Delta 50, Ativan sucks to get off of so don't increase your dose. My dad ended up in the ICU detoxing. Make sure you are monitored as you taper off it. Maybe try a center where you can go spend however many days it takes for you to get clear of it. I did it all wrong, naked, sweating and shivering on the bathroom floor. I was to weak to lift up to the toilet to vomit. This happened at a boyfriend's house. The guy who pushed me to stop taking my medication. He told me to clean up and leave. He didn't ask if I was ok, did I need a towel or blanket... It was about 3 AM. He made me feel like filth. I hope you can do it in a caring environment, with a blanket, and someone who knows how to help you through the process.

Stippler profile image
Stippler

I can also relate. I used to take ativan and klonopin and they had nightmarish effects on me, landing me in the hospital numerous times. My doctor at that time just kept telling me to take more and more. The more I took, the worse I got. It was hell getting off of them, but it was totally worth it. In fact, it was the best thing I ever did. I have a new doctor now, and it has been about 5 years since I took any anxiety meds. I do still have anxiety, but it is for the most part better without the benzos. At least I don't have that severe chemically induced depression that they caused. I would say to try to focus on the goal, and give yourself permission to have down time. You can do it - just take it one day at a time.

1Penny profile image
1Penny

Hang in there. I tapered off Ativan very slowly. I know how hard that can be. I agree with everything Stippler shared. I'm no longer on meds and better for it. One day at a time. Life will get better than this. Benzos are just awful.

delta50 profile image
delta50 in reply to 1Penny

Ive been off Ativan for 20 days now and its been pretty rough. I know I am improving but not each day and I am frustrated by the slow progress. I may have stopped the taper too soon, did not want to take another dose. Quit one year to the day after beginning.

1Penny profile image
1Penny in reply to delta50

Glad to hear that you are off the Ativan. It took me 10 months of a slow taper with a razor blade. I would remove 1/16 of the pill every day for at least two weeks. Really until I felt normal again and then would take another 1/16 out every day and do the same, and even then I was taking a dust of it for additional days until I could handle being off completely. It was one of the most difficult things to do. I read somewhere that Ativan was never intended for long term use. Why don't the drs tell us this.🙁 Well, glad you're off. Stay strong. Life does get better.

Karaoke73 profile image
Karaoke73

same here having hard time

delta50 profile image
delta50

It does get easier. I'm now four months off and on new medication as was diagnosed bipolar. Doctors have told me that I hold onto medication which makes it even harder to stop taking them, plus I am very sensitive to medication changes. Tapering off Ativan was a nightmare. I won't ever take that medication or any benzo ever again. Now I am taking gabapentin for anxiety which is helping.

You may also like...

Positive things in my life right now

I have been struggling with alot of health issues and I have gotten nowhere. I have a new Dr.who...

Trying my hardest to fight theough

off balance. I been crying a lot to I just want this to go away :,( sometimes I just want to sleep...

My hardest year in the last 30

Here I am, again. I've been here before, but always pulled myself out of the dark. I can't seem to...

New to this thing and up to my neck

I've been fighting depression since I was in my teens but not like this. The past year has been the...

Alchol is Destroying my life

Am only one day clean and am so ready to be done drinking. I finally realizing it don’t really help...