Simple Plan wrote it best:
I'm just a kid and life is a nightmare/I'm just a kid I know that it's not fair/Nobody cares 'cause I'm alone in the world is/Having more fun than me tonight
I was diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder and Depression, Unspecified in January 2018. I was in my second semester of my junior year of college. I started Lexapro three days after my initial intake and I couldn't believe how well it worked. The doctor told me it would take two to six weeks to kick in, but I noticed progress on day 3. It was WILD!
From then on life has bee mostly onward upward. Little things stopped bothering me. I got much better at time management and school became a lot easier. I found it easier to try new things. Unfortunately, I didn't take my psychiatrist's advice to couple medication with Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. I mean, I tried once, but it felt like too much of a hassle to get past the intake appointments. And usually, things returned to normal after a few days after a relapse.
Something happened last week and I realized that not only am I anxious, but I'm thinking very little of myself these days... I had the worst attacks of my life this week over things that I know ultimately are not as bad as I think they are.
I recognize I need help, but I don't like the idea of telling my problems to a middle aged therapist (no offense to any well educated middle age people reading this). It's just that I graduated college in May, so I don't have a lot of friends my age right now. Most of my social circle is older than me. I want people my age to talk to.
I just need to know that someone understands me. And that I'm not a screw up. And that I am with fighting for. Because I don't have it in me to do it alone...