Bad Role Model

[ZenGiraffe]

-Potential trigger warning- My very supportive grandfather (the only member of my childhood family who’s still in my life), was telling me yesterday that his good friend’s daughter tried to hang herself the other day, but the belt broke. Apparently she’s a young teenager, and she sees a therapist for her anxiety and depression. My grandfather asked me if it’s ok if her parents (his friend) were to talk to me if they felt it necessary. I was so caught off guard I said it’d be fine if they wanted to send an email. The issue I’m having is that I’m in no way a good role model for this young girl, and I don’t know what on earth I’d say to her parents to help them. I’m in my late 20’s and have had 3 failed suicide attempts, I’ve been on numerous meds, and am about to have my 90th ECT treatment. I’m finally turning to DBS in a clinical trial in hopes to ease my depression once and for all. But I mean, what helpful advice can I offer a child or her terribly worried parents? It certainly didn’t “get better” for me without seeking out extreme treatment measures and I’m finally resorting to brain surgery. I’m wondering if I should contact my grandfather and tell him that maybe it’s not the best idea if they talk to me, or if I should just leave it alone and if I get an email, do my best to find some uplifting things on the internet to repeat to them? (My grandfather is very much in the loop of my mental health problems and has taken me to most of my ECT appointments) I just don’t understand why he thinks that I’m a good person to talk to when I’m still very much struggling myself...

[Marshall64]

Maybe they are just looking it from the point that you have experienced depression. What would a good role model be, somebody that doesn't have it? Then they would not be able to relate.

If you do talk to her, you don't have to be an advice guru. She might just need someone to listen to her and not feel judged.

[fauxartist]

I have to say we probably are the best experts on depression and anxiety....and if you said anything...it would be to seek treatment and don't give up trying till you find something that works. That you are doing that very same thing, and that it can be frustrating and takes a lot of different trial and error turns...but to just not give up. And then refer to sites like NAMA....and a ton of other sites for kids in trouble.

[ZenGiraffe]

Thanks for the advice guys. That was essentially all I could come up w too, was to just be a nonjudgmental person to listen to her, and to try to convince her to do her best to stay strong while trying to get treatment... guess I’ll just wait and see if my inbox comes up w any new emails.

[Hidden]

She may just need someone to talk to who understands, another human who gets it. That’s you.

[gerg]

I think that I would want to talk to my G-pa about why he thought that I would be beneficial to the girl. This may give me some insight into myself that could be a benefit to me. Sometimes our own perception is part of what is holding us back.

[Hidden]

Just talk with them. Be honest if you don’t have an answer tell them you don’t. Relate your experiences with them.

[gogogirl]

Maybe- it's because you can relate?