my name is Russ i'm 19 and i've had agrophobia for a year tomorrow,
It all started on my way back to college in Chichester i had a panic attack on the bus and that was it stuck! i'm on ecitalopram 15mg and i also take vitamin b12 too keep my energy up, I am a self employed cabinet and furniture maker, I spend my days in my workshop making whatever I want and find it to be one of the places i am happy and calm, I have recently started seeing a girl i new as a kid who suffers from depression. we help each other out as best we can.
its nice because I spent almost 6 months on my own with just family to talk to when there not at work. I have a car and try and drive about can now just make the end of my road used to able to make it to my sister about 10 mins away but had a panic attack and haven't really driven for a few months.
my local nhs are crapp! I see a private therapist and when he prescribes new drugs they always complain that I get them at there dispensary. I am now totally reliant on my parents again after not living with the for the year before d day I have found a local charity shop that will sell my hand made boxes and things will hopefully bring in some cash to help pay my keep
I just seem to be going nowhere slow, I feel trapped like a caged animal, yet its me that says in my mind I cant go out I will have a panic attack or feel sick in my therapy sessions we talk about my messed up past and have tryed a few bits of cbt but i'm dyslexic and can barley talk about my feeling let alone put them on paper if i'm having a panic attack just feel lost