Hi yall,
I'm writing my first post on here, but I'm not a newbie in dealing with anxiety. My first panic attack was January 16, 2006. Since then I've had periods of literal HELL and periods of somewhat normal. But I've never been the same as before the first panic attack. I have a fear of any new med/antibiotic, vitamins, alcohol, ect. I am always paranoid that something will trigger an attack. I hate this feeling. Can anyone else relate? Thanks for listening..
Hi Fablegirl67, anyone of us can relate in what you fear. Anything that may change
us physically or mentally scares us because we need to be in control all the time. We do not like changes in our lives. We fear the unknown and the what ifs. After a while, our
world gets a little smaller until we feel trapped within our own mind.
Letting go of fear after that first panic attack is difficult and so the fear is always on the
back burner ready to surface with each and every negative thought in our minds.
I'm glad you came forward today to express your fears. This is the first step in getting
better. After 12 years of experiencing these fears, it's time for you to hear how others
on this site deal with anxiety. You are not alone by any means. Believe in that 2019 will
be the year you kick anxiety to the curb. You learn new methods in reducing your stress
and worries. You start trusting in yourself and the doctors. Life doesn't have to be this
complicated, anxiety makes it so. It's all going to work out for you once you are ready
to accept anxiety for what it is. A bully, a lie from our subconscious thoughts.
Welcome to this amazing forum. 
xx
Wow...That was an awesome welcome and I sincerely appreciate your encouragement, enthusiasm, and friendly response. I needed this today.
Hi fablegirl67,
I am exactly the same with meds I have citalopram sitting downstairs but have not took them yet not sure if I will. I took them back in 2009 and they did end up helping, the side effects were hightened anxiety panic atracks fuzzy head and detatched feeling but once they got into my system I was able to cope again. Ive read another post on here which said that the meds should not do this so maybe I should of changed them back then but I stick with them for just over 2 year. At the beginning of these meds I had to take diazepam too just to help deal with the heightened anxiety.
If you think you could try them go for it.
I'm trying a different approach at the min. I'm power walking for 30 mins each day outside. (I dont go far i stay close by to my home) It feels great to be out walking I don't feel anxious when walking but as soon as I get in the house bam I feel anxious.
It says on the internet to walk for at least 2 weeks or so before it improves, I'm on day 12 today. I don't work ither due to this horrible anxiety it's causing agoraphobia too. But find I have to much time on my hands to think about the anxiety, do you work?
I've started reading loads too about anxiety.
Jjb1983
Hi Jill...I haven't been able to work because of long periods of agoraphobia and panic attacks. I'd probably be homeless without my husband, God bless him..I have tried all of the anxiety meds, but I can't handle the heightened anxiety so I just gave up on that. What you said, about being okay while walking but having anxiety after you stopped? That happens to me too. It's the creepiest thing and makes me not want to walk at all. I wonder what causes this and I wish there was a way to make it stop. I'm in what I call a 'relapse.' Up until Sept. 2018 I had been working out religiously with no problems. Lifting weights and cardio..After my relapse of panic, I feel like an invalid. I went to the Cardiologist in Sept and he gave me a stress test. He said my heart is perfect. However, my panic and anxiety symptoms manifest themselves primarily as heart symptoms. That's what always gets me. He prescribed beta blockers, which I do take. But believe it or not, even beta blockers can't block all panic symptoms. For me, it's those palpitations/tachycardia that terrify me. It's been happening off and on for 12 years. I can walk and walk, but when I stop...BAM...Anxiety...it's so scary..
Anyway, thanks for your response Jill.
Be blessed
Fablegirl67, I didn't know you had Agoraphobia as well. I lost 5 years of my
life a while back because of that. It nearly broke me. But I won.
I also worked out with weights and did daily aquatic exercise. Like you said
it's once you stop the symptoms surface. That is when I found other tools to
keep me afloat when relaxing or doing everyday chores. Meditation and deep
breathing I found as my "go to".
The thing is never giving up, never get stuck, always go forward.
Make it a great day. Happy Friday Fablegirl! xx
My agoraphobia kept me housebound for 3 years..From 2006 to 2009..It's a vicious adversary to say the least...I overcame it back then. I went from being too afraid to walk to my mailbox to climbing a mountain. It can be done. My hope is that I can overcome it this time as well. Although at this time I do not have fullfledged agoraphobia, my comfort zone away from home is limited. And it sucks. I hope to begin exercising again soon, and desensitizing myself. I know that exercises is good for me both physically and psychologically.
Sorry fablegirl67
I lost my sister to leukemia 2 days ago. So I'm not doing to good. I am like you i have tried all the meds but do it naturally now and trying to just walk at the moment though I can't I don't have any energy at all I'm so drained from all the crying. But spent the whole day at hospital with her. I'm proud I managed to stay as I struggle with going far from home and the hospital was 20 mins away.
But I done it. She was only 28 bless her. I can't take beta blockers I have a low resting heart rate of 63 goes lower sometimes when I'm tired.
But I'm glad they sort you out a little.
I'm the same my heart rate goes up I feel it and panic. I hope you find something that works for you.
But my anxiety is like that.
Jjb1983
I'm so very sorry about your sister. You're in my prayers.
Fear of dying all the time
New to anxiety!!
Fear of dying 
