Can someone please talk to me. I'm so alon... - Anxiety Support

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Can someone please talk to me. I'm so alone with all this, Idk what to do

Elizabeth04
Elizabeth04
36 Replies

Everything is getting worse. Last night I went to bed crying to my husband about the way I feel. He says I'm just going through a chapter in my life and everything will get sorted out soon. I am not so sure about that. It is coming up on 2 years that this anxiety mess has struck. It has been an up and down roller coaster, somedays I'm great... I go out and go shopping... I clean my house... and for the most part my symptoms are not there. But oh 80% of the time im miserable, this is ruining my life. I am so tired... I ache... i constantly have heart palpitations...my chest is always burning. Yesterday I went out to try to do some things in my yard and I felt so weak and tired, I can back in and laid down. I am 26.. I shouldn't feel like this. I have a 6 year old and a 3 year old... I want to go to thier school and be there for them, play with them, but it is so hard when you feel so terrible. My husband bought me a gym membership... They have massage beds there and he thought it would help me get out and about. I can't even go, I feel too bad... I'm too exhausted to excersise and I've went from 120 to almost 140 lbs. I don't even recognize myself. I spend most days at home,cleaning my house, laying in bed, checking my bp too make sure I'm okay bc I feel like my chest pain is my heart... even though I've had normal ekgs and xrays awhile back. It is a miserable way to live honestly.

I went from feeling awesome, looking awesome, I used to work in a good hospital as a nurse assistant. Now I'm just wasting away. I don't know what to do. I take klonopin .5mg a day. I've tried quitting it over and over and have failed. I have tried anti depressants and failed.

There's no hope for me

36 Replies
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Ladygrey

Dear Elizabeth

Your husband is being a great support - reassuring you that this will pass, that there is hope.

Keep taking small steps. Maybe make up a timetable. Just one thing a day be it cleaning, shopping, gym (those beds sound therapeutic), kids school (once a fortnight) and make the yard family time... involve the kids.

Don’t set any targets. Keep yourself busy but also have some time to relax/recharge your batteries.

Take care.

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Elizabeth04

Those are some great ideas. Thank you so much. Yes I'm so thankful that my husband is supportive, sometimes I feel bad that he has to deal with me like this. I am certainly alot different now than I was a few years ago.

I guess it just gets me down. Day after day of not feeling well and life is just passing me by

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Trees2357

You are so lucky that your husband is supportive. My husband wants to leave.

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Elizabeth04

I am so sorry. I am worried all the time that he would leave me over this.

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Trees2357

My lower back hurts bad back spasms and throbbing. All I do is cry. I can't go for a walk. Doctor took down some meds don't know if tension is causing this.

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Elizabeth04

I threw my back out last week and was down for 4 or 5 days. I just layed in the bed in pain. It's so hard, we deal with anxiety/depression and then when something else comes along on top of all that, it makes ya wanna jusy throw in the towel sometimes.

I know if I start to get tension up around my shoulders and headaches... I'll take a muscle relaxer and a hot bath. Seems to ease the pain a little. X

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Pocha45
Pocha45
in reply to Elizabeth04

That's awesome he is there in facing the same battle but i have no kids or husband ...left my job fearing starting a new one just a mess ..my self esteem has dropped ...its been about 2 years. You are doing great at least you get out at times.

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Afraidmale

Ya same

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Starrlight

I’m sorry you are feeling badly. Taking care of two young kids is a huge job in itself. But I hear you saying you feel like you are wasting away and describing being overly tired.

Have you considered therapy to talk out what is happening ?

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Starrlight

P.s something that helps me is trying to stay in the present moment and also taking one thing or one day at a time so I don’t get overwhelmed

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Elizabeth04

Thank you. I need to find a good counslor, I'm sure he/she would help me. I just have to find a good one to go to

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mojojojo1323

Same here. I always have this anxiety just by going to work and on my days off i just stay at home.... Cuz im just tired. My husband is very supoortive too but he's deployed so i had to do everything by myself. I talk to him once in awhile and he never fails to reassure me that everythings gonna be fine....

I dont know what to do. I dont want to start and rely on meds. Sometimes i just wanna quit work and just be a house wife but i cant. It's just so sad.... And right now im about to go to work. And i cant wait to get out of worl already... Sigh

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Pocha45

Yup thats me or was ..it wasn't the work it was getting up getting dressed no energy anxious i eventuality broke luckily i got to take time off but the problem is still there smh

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Ollie33

Hi Elizabeth . I know exactly how you feel . I two have been suffering for nearly 3 years and have 3 young children . Have you tried going to see a councillor and talking it out . I did for over a year and it did help a lot . It's so hard to live when we're not the person we used to be . But we can get through this day by day xox

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Elizabeth04
Elizabeth04
in reply to Ollie33

Thank you. Yep day by day. I do feel like having a counselor talk to. I don't have any friends, I stay at home with my kids until my husband gets home from work. I hate unloading all my problems on him, when he just worked all day

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Ollie33
Ollie33
in reply to Elizabeth04

Yea I am the same only I work a few days a week too . Yea it's hard for me have friends as all mine emigrated. Did your read dr Claire weeves self help for your nerves book . It is about anxiety and all the symptoms we suffer from . Yea going to see a councillor made me feel a lot better so I could unload my issues on them. It's just about learning how to live with anxiety

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Elizabeth04
Elizabeth04
in reply to Ollie33

I need to order that book 💜

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Ollie33
Ollie33
in reply to Elizabeth04

Great read and helped me breath again . 💗

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Trees2357
Trees2357
in reply to Ollie33

I read that a long time ago. I'm doing so bad right now. All I want to do is cry. I got the thought in my head that if your scared of it it will get worse. When the anxiety came back many years later. My brain keeps telling me I can't stop being afraid and I'm worse. I can't get that thought out of my head. Do I need electro shock therapy to get rid of it.

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Ollie33
Ollie33
in reply to Trees2357

Sorry your going through this . Did you go back to doctor and explain that your suffering . Yea the fear of anxiety makes it worse . I go through good days and bad too . We still wake up every morning so we are ok we just are suffering inside xo

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Trees2357
Trees2357
in reply to Ollie33

I know but my family can't handle it either. I'm going to a new psychiatrist next week so I don't want to call mine. I've had lots of therapy. The thought just won't leave

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Ollie33
Ollie33
in reply to Trees2357

I know hopefully you will get some help . It's acceptance too . I accepted that I properly will suffer from anxiety the rest of my life . I just have to learn to cope with it . If I keep fighting with it it will get worse

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Icanbeathis2016

Listen. I know exactly how you feel. I have been going through this for over 2 years myself. And every time it hits me its as if Ive never been through it before. Like it new to me everytime. Sypmtoms switch up. Some i can recollect but then I get hit with symptoms, aches, pains, sensations that I just feel as if I don't know whats happening to me and Im stuck in tunnel vision all day worrying about my health. I swear it seems as if my anxiety has morphed or evolved to a whole new level of agony because it has me afraid to do anything. Even eat certain foods, I watch everything, I feel everything, I can't do any of my normal things without paying close attention.

And for me the opposite happens, I lost so much weight my first time of going through this. And even now with me gping through this again, it kills my appetite. I lose weight, upset stomach, my bowels movement switch up from loose to constipated, stomach cramps, all kinds of twitches, eyes sight crazy, eye floater, blurry, wierd things, almost every symptoms anxiety has to offer . Its like my body is malfunctioning. And its so disappointing and discouraging when you once felt so normal before like everything was fine. Life was decent, you felt almost invincible like everything was ok. And then this an now life is scary and for me Ive become so afraid to live. Im Sacred of death. And I have 2 kids. I cry so much because i think about not ever wanting to leave them.

You are right. It is a miserable way to live. And Im trying to do this without taking meds at all. I tried meds one time last year for 45 days and i quit after that and havent try it again. Sometimes i just dont know what to do.

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Trees2357

I'm suffering bad thoughts. Afraid of anxiety, bad back pain emotional pain especially. Im on medicine.

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howard327

Hi, I think that you should not give up on meds. It’s very likely that your problems could be caused by a chemical imbalance In your brain. If possible you should see a psychiatrist and work wiith her/him to develop a med program. You have really nothing to lose given the state that you are in. Meds have been God-given for me. The right meds can help you. Best of luck to you. Howard

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denvajade

Just a quick point my doctor put me on Cymbalta, it had helped my anxiety in a big way. 💜💜💜

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EmmaG74

Dear Elizabeth, it is great your husband is being supportive, but right now you can't see that far ahead, to the everything being ok. I wonder if that is putting pressure in you a little to be in already?

When I feel low, or anxious, I listen to my body and head. I rest, I read, I walk the dog, I write down how I feel and why if I know. I know own this has been a long time for you, so you want to feel ok again. If you had broken your leg you would be taking time to heal. Perhaps think of your mind in this way. Take medication which helps best (it won't be a full cure) if you can, talk to a health professional to maybe learn how to manage these feelings, to out coping strategies in place for you to take back control of your body and mind. But just be you. Don't do it for anyone but you and do what you can manage, Bute size pieces.

For me it can be daunting to look at the future, the wide picture, so take a day or an hour at a time. Get through that, do something positive for you in that day or hour. Take a hot bath with scented bubbles, bake a cake, prepare a nice dinner. But do what you can manage. Take the pressure off yourself. I look at my life as a pie chart sometimes. The chart is my life, and thus chunk of "pie" is a tiny part of it. It isn't forever and it doesn't define my whole life.

You are a sensitive, intuitive person with a big heart for your family and patients. This can be draining and exhausting. Remember, take care of you too, you can't drink from and empty cup. Follow this shitty path you have in front of you, plough through (you have the strength inside) until you find the yellow brick road. Your journey will show hopefully you and your family the strength you have inside. This isn't forever, it's just today and you can see it through xx

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Elizabeth04
Elizabeth04
in reply to EmmaG74

Thanks so much 💜

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exponential

Hi Elizabeth,

Your body went through some massive changes and this is natural. I would look into Candida since it is very common after physical stress for your body to misbalance nutrients and so on.

I don't know if this is the case for you, but from what you wrote I can relate a lot, especially your type of fatigue, heart-burn and probably very irregular metabolism? Too fast or tok slow..

Candida is not something to be scared of, its a bodily essential, yet it can misbalance and grow out of proportion.

I think your issue is an allergy to something you eat/drink everyday...

My family has all discovered these tiny things.... Rest assured you will feel better, and give yourself a break, guilt doesn't help. You must be trying so hard, I understand!

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mryan

Hi Elizabeth,

I highly encourage you to go to your PCP and suggest lab work to check your thyroid. Every symptom you are presenting with is caused from thyroid disorder. You have to be assertive with your Dr. and let him/her know how you are feeling and what you’d like them to check.

Monica R.N

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Elizabeth04
Elizabeth04
in reply to mryan

Thank you, I've wondered that. It seems like they checked that awhile back during on of my ER trips. It was in 2016... it said

TSH rfx on abnormal to free t4 4.49

Which was right on the edge of being out of range

Should I get it rechecked since it has been a while? Thank you!

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Hidden
Hidden

I feel exactly the same way. Just keep reminding yourself that you are physically healthy and nothing bad will happen to you. I know it is incredibly difficult especially when others can’t understand how terrible you feel. We will get through this!

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Jeff1943

Elizabeth, regarding your thyroid: 4.49 is just over normal but some clinics claim up to 5 is normal. Mine was just over 5 last week but my doctor wasn't worried, he said in past years it's been as high as 7.5. The point at which tablets are started is 10. In my case he wants another blood test in 3 months.

Elizabeth, it might be worth asking your doc for another thyroid test, thyroid can cause the problem of anxiety we all experience. Ask for a test even if it's just for reassurance though I suspect that's not the cause of your problems. A high thyroid reading can be caused by anxiety (just like anxiety can cause elevated blood pressure and blood sugar in tests). So it's a 'what came first, the chicken or the egg?' situation.

Elizabeth, we are all like second hand cars, we all have something that's not running perfect but we still drive on. I know you have been experiencing anxiety disorder some time, I think I have posted comments about it to you in the past. So I'll keep it short, here are my recommendations.

Don't keep concentrating on the symptoms you describe: the pains and palpitations and bad feelings. Concentrate on the cause: anxiety caused by over sensitised nerves. If you heal the anxiety all the symptoms will disappear.

Your nervous system is kept sensitused by the fear hormones you are constantly generating. Free yourself of fear and in time your nerves will return to normal and you will regain your quiet mind.

And you can free yourself from fear, Elizabeth, if you frame your mind to accept all the symptoms that your misfiring nervous system throw at you. Accept them calmly for the time being without fighting them. Fighting only means more stress and tension and fear.

I've probably said all this before but if you really want to recover from anxiety disorder by the Acceptance method then hear it from the horse's mouth: from the woman who first described this method 50 years ago. You know who I'm talking about don't you, Elizabeth, yes, Claire Weekes who wrote 'Self help for your nerves' U.K. version also titled 'Hope and help for your nerves' U.S. version both available from Amazon. A few replies back someone mentioned it and you said 'I really must read it.'

It's a short book devoid of complicated medical terms and you will recognise yourself in its pages. The gender roles are old-fashioned of course but it was written half a century ago.

In that time it has mended the broken nerves of tens of thousands of people. Go to the reader reviews on Amazon, there are hundreds of them, 90% rate it very good or excellent. The phrase 'saved my life' occurs frequently.

Why not read it sooner rather than later. I believe you will find it life changing.

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aphat06

Hi, dear. I can totally relate and could have written this myself. Same situation, blessed with a supportive and wonderful husband with two young kids. I too had a good job as a teacher and had to quit due to the severity of my anxiety making it impossible to function at work due to several panic attacks in the classroom per day. That was when the cookies crumbled. It has been 2 years now and I am slowly trying to regain control of my life back. Everyday is still a struggle and I do fall into the trap of thinking too far out about how I will never get better etc but looking back, it did! Maybe just not as fast as I thought it would. Many others have given valuable advice too. To me, I always tell myself that this is already rock bottom (the lowest) I can go so from now on, anything and everything could only go up and it will! Read those books recommended, At Last A Life and Hope and Help for Your Nerves by Claire Weekes. It will not help immediately but it will provide insights that you actually retained at the back of your mind and sometimes, when I am going through a rough day, I remembered certain parts of the books and it helped to calm my thoughts, knowing that it is just this anxiety demon trying to break me down. I wish you strength and please believe that it will get better, maybe not now, but someday, someway, somehow, it does. xoxo

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Pat140609

Hi Elizabeth, so sorry to hear how your feeling, sounds like extreme anxiety, me on sertraline for anxiety and depression , it's just a lottery for GP,s to get the right med. I have tried many and always go back to sertraline.

Ask your GP to do blood tests, check u are not lacking anything.

Wish I could say more...what would u say to your hubby feeling like this. ?

Remember it can't get worse , happiness is coming

Xx take care

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jaar

There is hope for you. It sounds like you have a husband who is trying to understand and you have two beautiful kids. Talk to you doctor, maybe try a new medicine. Its hard to know what to say for you to do i just know i feel for you very much. I hope you will find what really helps you, hang on to your family and tey to enjoy every minute especially when your having the best days. Make sure your family understands and live life the best you can and stick together, dont isolate from your husband and just keep trying until you find what helps, meds, meetings, spending time with your loved ones. I wish you all the best.

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