Hello I'm new here. I have panic disorder and GAD, advice?

Hello everyone! I never thought something like this would happen to me until about 2 months ago. I'm normally a super positive person, but after my first panic attack everything changed. I'm sure my story is very similar to other users, but something about making my own post makes me feel better. So I'm 23 years old and feel like my life is collapsing around me (dramatic music playing). Every day I wake up terrified. Every night I stay up far too late thinking, "am I dying, or going crazy?" Every doctor I've gone to see says I'm fine. I've been prescribed ativan .5mg three times a day and paxil 5mg once daily (I'm three weeks into it) for my panic disorder. The ativan works... um sometimes? And the paxil makes me feel uncomfortably high. I should be on 40mg for it to work properly. Also, I'm having involuntary twitching. So that's just awesome. It feels like I'm living in a dream instead of real life. I've stopped going to work and school for the time being because of the frequency of attacks (daily). My psychologist wants me to get out and start doing things again and work on breathing exercises, but I get the feeling she just wants my money lol. I suppose all this started with a 1 year binge of vodka every night. I know that was not smart, but I guess I became addicted to the feeling. Apparently my liver is mostly fine and the only thing that's messed up is my head. I ended up quitting alcohol cold turkey after my first panic attack. I was taking my fiance' back to the airport when all the sudden I got a surge of adrenaline and depression. I lost all feeling in my right arm, eye, and leg. I went to the ER. The doctors told me I was severely dehydrated and was having a panic attack. Ever since then, I've been traumatized from the event (more dramatic music playing) and can't stop having health anxiety. Will I ever be back to normal or am I going to be like this the rest of my life? I'm super miserable and live for the 1 to 2 hours of what I call "sanity" each day, where I feel normal for a short period. Any advice is appreciated. Thanks for taking time out of your day to hear my worries.


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10 Replies

  • Hi crescent_elite, you've got what it takes to over come this (dramatic music playing) and that is a sense of humor. We've got to have this as well as a positive attitude and it sounds like you have both. I too wake up with morning anxiety. Not a very nice way to face a new day. That first panic attack had to be terrifying for you. I'm glad you got checked out at the ER as well as having therapy with a psychologist. It is true about getting out again and especially about using the deep breathing exercises. I couldn't believe that proper deep breathing was the key to getting control over the anxiety symptoms. Now it comes automatically to me without even thinking twice. Whenever I'm in a stressful situation I go on auto pilot to my belly breathing. It has made a world of difference. You will get your sanity back, just curious what time of day does the 1-2 hours of normalcy occur? Right now the best thing to do is take advantage of the meds stabilizing you while you are in therapy. Listen carefully to everything the psychologist says even if you disagree. Eventually, the key to getting better will be in something they said that will give you a wake up call. I'm glad you found this forum, it has a wonderful group of supporting, caring people. I wish you well. Take care x

  • Thanks for your reply. I usually feel pretty good at some point late in the evening. I try to take advantage of this and eat food during that time because my anxiety has made me lose 40 pounds already 0.o

  • I figured that's when you would feel pretty good. Same with me and others who wake up to morning anxiety. It has to do with the cortisol being so high early morning. As the day wears on, it lowers making our anxiety lessen. Enjoy your Friday night. I'm waiting for a pizza delivery and a Lifetime movie. Take care :)

  • Nice, I've got friends coming over in a bit.

  • You will get better, don't be discouraged and hang in there, I know it' doesn't seem like it now but you will be okay, may God bless you (:

  • I shall muster the courage and try! I keep hoping I'll get better in a hurry though cus I'm impatient.

  • It'll take time but hang in there okay (:

  • Hi I'm quite new to anxiety too, I've had it since April just gone, I was such a mess, I had no control of my mind n body n thought that there was something seriously wrong with me. You do learn to accept what you have got till it n eventually goes as it won't last forever.once u accept u AV this anxiety u will learn that when u have one of ur moments that it will eventually become easier n easier to control. Your therapist is right in what she is saying about trying to continue with ur daily life, that is the first step of taking back control of ur life. I missed 3 weeks of work n didn't want to leave the house, my mum sometimes had to take my son to school as leaving the house scared Me to death, I was sometimes so bad I couldn't get out of bed. But one day I just said to myself I could either make myself worse by sitting in my house letting it best me n just constantly thinking about it, which again makes ur anxiety worse, or face my fears n start being me again. It was very very hard first couple of weeks but going to work now I'm fine :) I still get nervous when I have to go places I don't normally go to as this sets my anxiety off, but I push through it n think this is my life I'm going to live it the best I can, and I Know u can too. You have to try to be strong the best you can.

    AV you spoken to any of your friends about it? My 2 best friends have been amazing. One of them her n her hubby took me and my hubby bingo to get me out again socialising in busy places, it wAs hard n nearly had a big panic attack but I got through it eventually n had a great time. Your friends will help you through it,u need as much support as u can through it :) you will get better I ptomisev😄

  • Hey, yep I just finished a big weekend sleepover with my friends. I was sure to finish it off with a big panic attack though lol.

  • I am the same. I have suffered with anxiety for most my adult life. Im 31. However i have had spells where i was getting through it quite well but i had my 3rd child 9 months ago and ended up with post natal depression and that brought on all my anxiety again 😩. I dread going to busy places i try to avoid them like the plague and motorway driving i just cant bring myself to do it. I fear im going to have a panic attack and look like a fool or even worse cause an accident. I get envious of others who seem to just go about life normal and anxiety free , i think why am i like this?? Nothing major bad has happened in my past. There is no reason for it! However i go to bed with a thought... maybe tomorrow is the day i wake up anxiety free?? 🙏

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