Hello everyone! I never thought something like this would happen to me until about 2 months ago. I'm normally a super positive person, but after my first panic attack everything changed. I'm sure my story is very similar to other users, but something about making my own post makes me feel better. So I'm 23 years old and feel like my life is collapsing around me (dramatic music playing). Every day I wake up terrified. Every night I stay up far too late thinking, "am I dying, or going crazy?" Every doctor I've gone to see says I'm fine. I've been prescribed ativan .5mg three times a day and paxil 5mg once daily (I'm three weeks into it) for my panic disorder. The ativan works... um sometimes? And the paxil makes me feel uncomfortably high. I should be on 40mg for it to work properly. Also, I'm having involuntary twitching. So that's just awesome. It feels like I'm living in a dream instead of real life. I've stopped going to work and school for the time being because of the frequency of attacks (daily). My psychologist wants me to get out and start doing things again and work on breathing exercises, but I get the feeling she just wants my money lol. I suppose all this started with a 1 year binge of vodka every night. I know that was not smart, but I guess I became addicted to the feeling. Apparently my liver is mostly fine and the only thing that's messed up is my head. I ended up quitting alcohol cold turkey after my first panic attack. I was taking my fiance' back to the airport when all the sudden I got a surge of adrenaline and depression. I lost all feeling in my right arm, eye, and leg. I went to the ER. The doctors told me I was severely dehydrated and was having a panic attack. Ever since then, I've been traumatized from the event (more dramatic music playing) and can't stop having health anxiety. Will I ever be back to normal or am I going to be like this the rest of my life? I'm super miserable and live for the 1 to 2 hours of what I call "sanity" each day, where I feel normal for a short period. Any advice is appreciated. Thanks for taking time out of your day to hear my worries.
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