Sorry if this is long
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I took ecstasy about a month ago, it brought on a panic attack amd bad trip, since the I think I have PTSD, or panic disorder, or hypochondria, or just severe anxiety, I'm not sure what I have.
After the pill I was fine for two weeks, until one day I was on the bus home from college (I'm 16), all day I felt sort of weird and depersonalised, so on the bus my anxiety hit me hard and I started having a panic attack, me and my friends got off the bus and I continued having this panic attack, I thought I was about to drop dead. I made my friend ring an ambulance, when I got in the ambulance my heart was 170. I got to A&E, they checked my heart rate about 5 times during the time I was there, after I calmed down they spoke to me and basically sent me home after reffering me to mindsmatter.
Ever since, I've been convinced I'm dying. I'm tired, barely sleep because I'm scared I'm not going to wake up, dizzy (I take iron tabets and vitman D and calcium tablets after a recent blood test, and I also take sleeping pills to send me to sleep because I literally didn't sleep properly for 2 weeks), my brain feels like it "buzzes" or is fuzzy most of the time, I feel depersonalised all the time, I see things that aren't there (like small black dots or lines of light), I constantly check my pulse because I feel like my hearts trying too hard to carry on pumping, I feel like I force myself to breathe, I have tinitus, and more symptoms.
I honestly just feel like my body is slowly shutting down on me and one of these nights I'm not going to wake up, I feel like it's tonight to be honest. And I'm just so scared I'm only 16 I don't want to die.