I am fed up with feeling so ill every day with anxiety related anything

Another post from me again...Thanks for all your support...Every single day now I am having to go to bed at about 5.30-6.00 in the evening because I feel so ill...Today I feel dizzy and light headed and crying and yesterday was hell on earth.I had to go and lay on my daughters bed at 12.00 and fell asleep and then when I got home after my other daughter brought me home, I was still feeling ill and took to my bed at 5.00 and stayed there and was in floods of tears when my husband got home...I have no quality of life lately and neither has he with me if I am honest but he still looks after me..This morning I am in the shower at 6.00 in the morning with legs like jelly as I am most mornings before he leaves...A lay in is a thing of the past as I cannot stay in bed if I am in the house on my own.My husband had to go to work today..I have had this for nearly a year now and it has really taken a toll on my body to the extent I am afraid I am going to just collapse one day and that will be it..I am going to the doctors on Wednesday to get some blood tests done because I cannot just believe it is anxiety..My heart beat was high yesterday and blood pressure...I have got one of those blood pressure machines that you can buy from the chemist...Since I ended up in hospital with low blood pressure and heart beat,I now check myself on a daily basis. I have become paranoid in fact another awful sideline of anxiety I suppose..My appetite is still not good...Cup a soups and yoghurts being the main as it is easier to get down..When will it all end.!!!!..I am having therapy once a week and he says that medications will not always make me better as it will have to come from me and I understand that..But I am trying so hard to overcome it and then it just starts again the next day and another hell day to deal with..I actually dread each day and I was never like this once...Used to enjoy life to the full and wham bam,this happened which has floored me...

8 Replies

  • hi, im soo sorry to hear that your having such a crap time, it really is rubbish and not nice at all, its like a loop you get yourself in and it feels never ending. Ive had the dizziness everyday, no appetite, the feeling exhausted and wanting to sleep all the time, so weak and shaky, terrified of my partner from leaving me because I felt like I was about to die, I didn't understand why I felt so poorly.

    Its good that your going to your gp, get some tests and see, you could be anemic or anything making you feel so rotten. I had months of this and went to my gp who did tests after tests, and I just wanted him to find something anything so I could put a name to why I felt so ill. he found nothing and that when I realised it was just my anxiety.

    I couldn't stand due to my dizziness I slept all day, so in the end I got myself up and started doing light housework, even if it worried me and I felt ill I kept pushing and trying to get past it. I didn't dare leave my house, so I got up and went in the garden a few times. I just kept on pushing past it and trying to ignore it, giving my mind something to totally distract me and I noticed at points of the day it went occasionally. Its like the more you worry about it the worse it gets, then your dreading the days ahead incase of it so the moment you wake its on your mind making you feel it.

    Try and relax I really understand that's harder then it seems but it will help until you see the doctor, least then you will know what is causing it.

    I found myself feeling so depressed and wanted to do all these things but didn't felt up to it, so I set myself very small achievable goals that would boost me and make me feel like I had done something that day or it made me happy and laugh, it really does help.

    Im sorry if im not much use or cant take it away from you, all I can say is I know how you feel and you will get past this try not be so hard on yourself and enjoy the day however much you can

    Take care hunny keep us updated xxxx

  • Hi tudor55, I'm sorry your having such an awful time at the moment. I think we have all been where you are at some point, and it's very frightening. I know your appetite is suffering (as does mine) this could maybe contribute to the jelly legs and light headed- ness. I find when I can't eat my medication does not work as it should, I had an appointment with a dietician and she advised (gold top) full cream milk with 3tbl spoons of semi-skimmed milk powder, it fortifies the milk and makes it around a 1000 calories a pint, that's enough to help meds along, and get that all important calorie intake up:)

    I understand what your therapist is saying, medication can only do so much - but when I found the right meds and to be honest it did take a long time, the confusion, the dread and the all consuming fear lifted a little, so you can be a bit more focused on managing you're anxiety.

    I understand you are in therapy, do you see a mental health team? As it was a phsyciatrist who got my meds right, if not you can ask to be referred to secondary services, if you would want to (I don't know if it works like this where you live)

    As for when it will end, I'm sorry I wish I could tell you, I can't, but I can tell you - compared to this time last year I am a different person, I have hope for the future and that's something I haven't felt in a very long time:) please know you are not alone in this, sending you love and light.

    Warmest wishes

    Eva x

  • Sorry that youre having such a horrid time, ive been there and I know how awful it is......

    Do you not take any meds??

    Love and Hugs Ker xx

  • Thanks for your support.....I take pregablin and I am under a wellbeing and recovery team and that includes a phychiatrist too..As I write this I am having a good half an hour until the next onslaught of crap to deal with..Trouble is that it hits without warning which is the worst part..Does this happen to you..

  • I take pregablin too.... 100mg twice a day and anti-dep in evening too......... yeah I can feel fine and then an overwhelming sense of doom and panic come over me, I was hoping to get back to work in March but not sure if that is gona happen now.............

    Ive started keeping a journal of how I feel and to see if there is a pattern to it!! ie hormones??

    Take care of yourself!!

    Love Ker xx

  • I would also like to add that the guy at the therapy gave me some good advice...Taking things slowly is graded exposure..in other words one day at a time and do not rush to do things as it may overwhelm. That is called flooded exposure...I am trying to do graded exposure but it is still hell trying to deal with it ..It will take time to get this illness under control I think

  • Hi Tudor, sorry to hear u feel the way u do. I remember being the exact same, most people have felt like that before on here and I really feel for u. From the moment u wake up till the time u fall asleep it's just one big black cloud ova u. I had the dizziness day in day out and like I I thought the worst. People wud come and visit me or I wud force myself to walk up to my moms. Conversations going on around me felt distant, I cryed day in day out, I was scared of the now and day after day I told the doctor I was going mad. Yes I took medication because I cudnt pull myself back up as anxiety had got me and I didn't know how to pull myself out of it even thou I tried. My life changed just like that. I'm not saying anxiety as gone but the black cloud isn't ova me day in day out. I can have a conversation with someone and even wen I feel anxious I don't stop and panic anymore because of the way I feel I just let it be and try to carry on.

    U will get better, it takes time and there will be bad days still but u will get there. Wat helped me was a book I red anxiety no more. The writer suffered bad with it got over ten yrs then he realised wat he needed to do to get back up. It made me realise and it did help. I actually send him tweets from time to time wen I'm feeling bad and he advices on them from his own experience xx

  • Hi Tudor55

    I totally agree with Donaf, I have felt exactly the same and as Donaf said medication could help.

    It made a complete difference to me and I felt I came out of that black cloud of tears, zero appetite and constant pain.

    I hope you push your GP for meds, you can and will feel better and being on them will give you time to come to terms with your anxiety as you can feel so much stronger.

    You will find you can seem to manage things better and all doesn't seem pointless.

    Thinking of you Tudor.

    All the best. X

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