I am irritated that I feel alone and isolated. I have tried to get out, I took a beginner yoga class and the teacher was wonderful. Now I am supposed to choose my two week free classes and I am overwhelmed. I really hate going outside, it was a lot to go to the beginning classes, I was shaking by the time I arrived, but I did it. My GPS is the sole reason I get out at all and sometimes it will direct me in circles and I don't have enough of a sense of direction or humor at this point to get on the right path.I don't like explaining about the directional disability or my constant fear of being lost. I hear, " but you have lived here for years." Obviously I know that. I keep notes on routes to and from places I have to go. But out of nowhere I will suddenly forget how to get home. I get so mad, I'm smart! Why can't I do this?
I need to get outside, I would like to walk my dog. I hate being alone all the time.
Hi I can almost hear your frustarted voice, and So many of us have felt frustrated with ourselves. Can I speak to that mean inner dialogue voice who tells you you've lived here your whole life and tell that voice to just stop and give Keeper-of -the-dogs some Grace. I can't imagine you would be unkind to someone with the same feelings so please be more patient with yourself- and I'm so happy that you were able to get out to a class.
Hi K-O-T-Ds. Oh how I hear you. That could happen to me again I know. I have suffered from long bouts of depression all my life with a guge anxiety feature and have had 3 bouts of agoraphobia in ny life
So, as temporarily terrifying as it can be, and you won't want to hear this, I can't emphasize enough: KEEP PUSHING yourself to do ANYTHING outside of the house, even if it's walks at a dog park.
I had a bout 30 yrs ago the nearly crippled me for a long time. I eventually was afraid to lose sight of my home.
Grocery shopping? Forget it. My ex had to do it.
Then one day a close friend told me what I have said above: cost you what it may in anxiety, fatigue or plain dread ... get a cheerleader and force yourself to push thru just a few trips that cause you real anxiety. Or, one big trip with " check-in" points where you call your cheerleader ... someone who believes in you. Baby steps work too but just not too many. Say 4 scenarios.
Here's the cool part: all of a sudden, on one of your outings you realize that you are still nervous but the dread is not overwhelming anymore. Then one day not very far off you will feel this big sense of freedom.
You wont be able to decide which 4 steps ( with ever increasing levels of challenge), to do. So throw about 6 or 7 of them in a box and pick out four. Remember that if you cannot complete one YOU ARE NOT A FAILURE!
Anyway, this is how it worked for me and a number of friends. You may shake, sweat and swear ... so keep in touch with your cheerleader every 25 mins to begin with.
Anyway, you've got this!
Just my thots.
Ataloss
I'm tired of talking about it! I'm tired of having to go through it! It's just been consuming me ! I'm tired of the thoughts!
The inner voice and intrusive thoughts make you feel they are trying to keep you safe that’s the really crazy thing but whilst I know that Cant be the case they are rather insistent and relentless even in situations where you know right from wrong there is such a conflict going on internally that you find yourself as you say following the wrong GPS coordinates I used to have killer instincts I swear I could at one stage follow them without any problems now I don’t even trust them hard times and your not alone keep sharing your thoughts and feelings at the very least you have lessened the burden by talking about it
Hang in there. Raise the rent on that anxiety and depression monster and kick em out of your head. It’s literally a monster. Likes to bring us down and then set back. You are brave and strong, and the fact that you try and get out and attempt, in strides you’re doing it!! Try some deep breathing exercises and mindfulness, just identifying things around you that relate to your senses. For example the flower smells sweet or the table is brown and do it continuous slow the thoughts down. Hugs.
Some days the best I can manage is standing outside when I put the dog on her run. Sometimes I just let her out and look out the window. Depression is isolating and people who don't experience it say things that make it worse. But you went to the classes. That is huge. I hope you can find that strength you showed going to yoga class for a little bit each day.
Sorry to hear about you're overwhelmed life can take us on many twists and turns and the fearfulness which takes hold of our perspective and habits the need to feel positive within our interior anxious attachment building more self worth and appreciation self care activities purposeful understanding connecting with family friends or groups talking is key to realise of those sensitivity's that hold take hold you are worthy building self esteem hope y youre journey will unfold and you find focus
It really is such a feeling of isolation when you have no friends ( close friends) . Loneliness is awful. I’m trying to be more social here where I live, but I just don’t feel I fit in.
Keeper-of-the-dogs, you are stronger than you think. Look at what you did, you actually went outside and went to a Yoga class. You did that on your own, how awesome is that! Know go walk your dogs, keep going and let go.
Please try to keep going to the yoga class. It will help you so much, both getting out and the yoga itself. If you need to soothe yourself while you wait for your next class, you may want to give an online session a go. Adriene is fabulous and has a whole set of yoga for beginners and yoga basics videos free on YouTube. She also has a lot that are specific for anxiety.
Yoga For Panic And Anxiety | 15 Minute Yoga Practice (won't let me embed, but you can search in YouTube and it will come up.)
These are very simple sessions. Don't worry about the exact shape, just do your best, easy approximation. The alternate nostril breathing really does help! I do these when I am having an attack and many others from Adriene almost daily.
And don't forget to be proud of yourself for going to the first class! I KNOW how hard it can be to leave home when you are struggling with anxiety. Hang in there.
I'm so proud of you that you went to the yoga class - that is huge! Your dog pic is very cute - can you set a teeny-tiny goal - like just walking the dogs to the corner - to start? That's what I have to do, but I don't know if that works for everyone. Also, screw those people who question you about your sense of direction. That is not cool!
You have my sympathy. If there's a wrong way to go, that's the way I'll go. Thank goodness for a reasonable satnav in my car. If only it were less bossy.
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