I was feeling okay for a while but now its all back. I don't want to go out and it takes me a long time convince myself that I have to do things. I have nobody that I can tell about my depression because it's been happening for so long now and I feel like I'm such a burden to all of them. I just feel awful every day and alone and I'm so tired of it. Also even though it's only July, I've been getting really nervous about my senior year because I'm taking some hard classes and I have no idea where I want to go to college or what I want to do. I really don't like how fast time is going by and it makes me nervous and sad. I'm also sad because my SAT scores weren't that good and to graduate with honors I need a 4.0 GPA and I have a 3.9. This stuff matters because my brothers got high scores and they graduated with honors and I'm just tired of being the messed up and not smart enough child. I try so hard and I get nowhere and I'm so tired of trying. I'm so tired of not being good enough, mostly for myself. I'm so tired of feeling this way.