First time seeking support outside of my family: 27 year old female suffering from depression and anxiety. I've known of my 'illness' for some time now and I haven't felt this way in over a year. I can't get myself out of this fog. I've been feeling this feeling for about a month? Praying it wouldn't come down to this..... dark place... this feeling of being alone and sad, but it has. Taking a leave of absence from work because I just can't get myself to get up every day and face the world to just continue to be miserable. The thought of having to deal with the world, makes me feel like I can't breathe.. The feeling like if I step outside my door, I will let everyone down. The feeling of loss, sadness, anger and just feeling worthless... it's overwhelming, it's scary. This... this feeling is hard.
I have a wonderful support group, yes, but it's not enough. The love and compassion they all have for me is unreal, but in my mind..... it doesn't do anything. I never feel good enough, for anyone or anything. Though I am doing exactly what I should be and how I should be. This last month, has broken me to a low, low place. Will I ever just be normal? Will I be able to get up every day and be the person I wish to be?? Maybe one day, but today... today is not that day.