Help for my 11 year old

[Oct18]

Any advice for my 11-year-old would be much appreciated. He has been in therapy and on medication for over a year and has gotten worse with each day. He has been diagnosed with anxiety and depression. Being seen by a child psychiatrist I don’t think they have him properly diagnosed. They started him on Zoloft and after bad reactions with side effects switched him to Prozac . That seemed to help slightly but after about nine months he was regressing, so after genetic testing showed that was not the best medicine for him they switched him to cymbalta. After that did nothing for about a month they added Abilify. Again after about a month or two he was worse. He has mood swings that go from very happy playing with friends to the second they leave he wants to kill himself. He’s very narcissistic and every day his moods may change three or four times per hour from happy to sad. So the doctor recommended stop Abilify and try seroquil. he has mood swings that go from very happy playing with friends to the second they leave he wants to kill himself. He’s very narcissistic and every day his moods may change three or four times per hour from happy to sad. So the doctor recommended stop Abilify and try Seroquil. I have not started the Seroquel, I think he needs to be reevaluated and re-diagnosed. Apparently they can do a psychological analysis but they won’t do it because they said he’s too young . I am currently looking for a more qualified professional but live in a small town so it’s not going to be here and I’m getting very little help from his psychiatrist for referrals . now that school has started back I am getting calls daily of him acting out at school trying to hurt himself . Does anyone have experience with Seroquil and children? I think his current psychiatrist is just going down the list and reading a book of what to do next. I don’t think they’re in treating the right diagnosis . Before when he was down he would just be sad, now it’s turning to evil and self harm in the look on his face is like he is not my child, like something else is consuming him

[Dolphin14]

I'm sorry this is happening to your son. Is he doing other forms of therapy besides talk therapy? I suppose in a small town that may not be accessible?

I think I would travel and get some other testing done on him. What he's doing right now sounds like it may be making him worse?

[Oct18 in reply to Dolphin14]

Yes that’s the problem I think what he’s taking now he’s making him worse and I plan to travel to find more qualified doctors.

[Dolphin14 in reply to Oct18]

It's a difficult situation. Please be sure to take care of yourself. As mothers we give all of ourselves to our children. We need to be sure we stop and do something for ourselves. Take walks, go shopping, something to get away for a bit of peace.

[bluemoon2u]

I feel your pain. Has anyone considered that he might be manic depressive? The swings sound too intense to be just depression. Is he in therapy? It helped my son. My off the cuff thought would be to ask him why he doesn't like himself-- talking in the first person. "It doesn't sound like you are too happy with Joe right now. What are you feeling?" My thought is that if he can separate himself from his condition he might get a better handle on what is going on? It might also help to search this site for a help with kids room. I don't know if one is available but finding other parents struggling with the same issues helped my mindset when we were struggling.

[bluemoon2u in reply to bluemoon2u]

Sorry I see that you said he is in therapy. What are the therapists comments? Has he ever expressed the desire to hurt someone else? He is at an age where hormones start to kick in. That's rough for any child and just adds one more factor to an over whelmed brain.

[Oct18 in reply to bluemoon2u]

His therapist is just saying he has anxiety with depression. I have said from day one and there’s more to it than that, I don’t know if he’s bipolar or has borderline personality disorder but it’s not as simple as anxiety and depression not that’s not major but I’m in the process of finding him a new doctor and trying to get him re-diagnosed. He does not want to harm others he just wants to harm himself

[Beevee]

Other than suffering anxiety myself for a number if years and learning how to overcome it by educating myself on the subject, the mood swings might be attributable to the coming and going of anxiety which can be triggered by anything, once the involuntary nervous system that controls the emotions becomes sensitised through prolonged stress or a series of stressors/ trauma. When sensitised, the ability to cope with normal situations diminishes because the emotions are magnified. By this, I mean something that might not gave bothered someone before anxiety will now seem overwhelming, and the sufferer uses avoidance tactics in order to stop or prevent the feelings.

Obviously I am not an expert but have a theory that many of the disorders suffered by children (and adults) are fear based, brought on by sensitization as described above.

I learnt all if the above by reading books published by Dr Claire Weekes which helped me enormously during my recovery. Unfortunately, many adult sufferers cannot comprehend why they are thinking and feeling the way they do so young children won't be able to understand either and only show it through the way they react to situations.

In a nutshell, continous exposure to the fears is the way to recovery. That can also include fearing the feelings of fear which is the main reason many people continue to suffer. They have no real problem that concerns them greatly other than fearing the symptoms of anxiety which keeps the symptoms coming and creating a cycle.

Hope this helps in some small way.

[Oct18 in reply to Beevee]

Thank you, it does

[NeuronerdDoaty]

Hormones will change it to the harm himself level. Psychs tend to leave that out.

What happened that makes him so angry? With my son I removed all technology. I put him in a school that was all hands on. I took him off medication. I put him on an exercise program with me. I changed his diet and taught him to meditate. When he was put in meds it was Neuro meds.

I would request a 24 hour EEG at least. All humans have hit their heads. Is it possible he’s having frontal lobe complex partial seizures? You sure describe them well.

Doaty

[Oct18 in reply to NeuronerdDoaty]

All great questions to ask a doctor when we find one that can help him. I am reaching out to more reputable qualify doctors in the chapel hill area in North Carolina . His moods turn on a dime, he’s up and down several times even in one hour and half the time we don’t know what triggers it .

[NeuronerdDoaty in reply to Oct18]

That’s where I went to school. Duke. Most of my medical/technical training was done there. I just finished a 15 year research project there. I also worked in High Point and Winston. My best choice for you just left for the Cleveland Clinic. If you want some help getting in to the right doc and faster just message me. I still have my contacts. I know they send enough patients to me.

[All_alone in reply to Oct18]

I'm reading all the posts here and I agree you need to get a new Dr. Have you looked for things in Raleigh? Take care of him as well as yourself.

[Oct18 in reply to NeuronerdDoaty]

Thank you for your response and advice !

[1947treble]

Please advocate for him, get multiple medical opinions, stay involved. For his age, there is a lot that would hurt him more than help. I know a lot about meds and those are pretty heavy and I hope it's in small doses. Other than that, stay strong and take good care of yourself too, it'd be the best way to help both of you. (You and your son)

[Oct18 in reply to 1947treble]

Thank you so much, I am doing the best I can, but it is very exhausting. I can only imagine what it’s like for him and his twin brother and older sister are having a hard time with it too. I am seeking a new doctor, but doctors he has seen arr not taking it serious enough

[Amz1987]

That’s so hard

I’d personally wean off all meds to give his little mind and body a brake and then go from there.

Has he been assessed for anything in particular like ASD, he could have bipolar disorder (that could explain his highs and lows) etc?

My 10 year old is being assessed and it’s looking as if he has mild autism. He has crazy mood swings from time to time, it’s not a daily occurrence but the way he does things and they way his mind works is very different to my other 3 children.

I’ve had to collect him from school multiple times because he’s not coped with change or a situation at school.

Is there any chance he could be being bullied, what is causing his anxiety?

It’s so hard when they are so young.

My son sees an occupational therapist, try looking into that. It’s where they learn how to cope at school and in different sorts of situations. Gives them strategies to cope with a meltdown.

Also his diet, some children are very reactive to certain additives/artificial colours/flavours and preservatives in food.

Try him on a whole food diet with no highly processed food and limited added sugars.

[Calm_mama]

Big hugs to you mama you must be so stressed. It sounds like you are going to seek out more help, I'm so glad to hear it. A couple of things I thought of as I read your post/replies.

First, can you videotape some of the behaviors for the professionals? I know how frustrating it is when professionals don't see the concerns. Going on your report isn't as telling as having evidence to show

Also, I think you are right to turn over all the rocks. Push to get him evaluated thoroughly. Get a correct diagnosis or diagnoses. When you get that you'll research it and have a sense of whether it's accurate or not. You are with him constantly- you know what you're seeing and experiencing.

The other thing I'm thinking is that if you make the trip somewhere far to get established with more expert and thorough care, some of the follow ups might be possible via video conference, to save you a long trip. I hope this is the case for your sake.

Lastly, once you have a diagnosis that makes sense, see if you can get him a 504 or IEP at school so he has accommodations.

This is a lot of work and so much strain and worry for you. Try to take care of yourself along the way. Prayers for you and big hugs xoxo