I’ve opened myself up to dating just to realize how my choices in potential partners is really f*cked. There’s a guy I like, he’s established that he “likes me, finds me attractive and wants to kiss and go further” but here’s the thing. He doesn’t want ANYONE to know and that’s a huge red siren wailing in my head telling me he ain’t any good for me. I know he doesn’t value me in my ideal way. It’s clear he has another agenda and all- but I still can’t just break it off. Part of me likes it. The other part of me dreads it. I feel like he wants to use me. However at the same time I don’t care if he does? It’s so confusing and I don’t get it. I don’t understand this, my intuition is telling me this isn’t a good idea so why do I feed off of it? My anxiety makes me a very vulnerable person, especially to guys preying on me, it’s really hard to find any sort of relationship that doesn’t have ulterior motives. Nice guys end up being bad guys, bad guys end up being bad guys. It is true he always asks me for consent and doesn’t do anything without explicitly making me feel uncomfortable. But he still doesn’t want anyone to know, it’s clear there’s something that isn’t right. I want to find out what. Is he using me for fun? Or cheating? I don’t know. It’s frustrating.