A right step

[Kevin160]

Im ditching the BP monitor, just threw it away from my reach for the time being , going to try for atleast 3 days , i guess facing this fear can help ..i know deep down im fine ..its never higher than 150/100 and that happens rarely , most of the time its between 100/70 and 130/80 , it just became a habit to measure it to feel safe physically from stress, eventhough the stress is caused by fear from stress and the affect on my bp and heakth , now i feel the strongest and im gonna make this work thanks to the support of all people here ,if i do this i will realize that if i can get through this then i dont jeed to measure my bp all the time, its rarely crazy high so i guess im fine.. although im worried that i would stress alot these days and not having an idea what my bp will be is scary, i can only overthink which ill try to stop ..

[Hidden]

your doing the right thing fev,do you know what kev ive ocd and what you are showing is

trases of ocd,in the fact that you want to check bp all the time,but don't over worry about

it kev but bear it in mind,

[Kevin160 in reply to Hidden]

I dont know anymore, but i do worry about it, i have fear of it being high, once it goes down i feel sort of like safe, it just diesnt get crazy high but with stress my normal is 110/70 or less but with stress it gets to 140/90 ish...i do worry about it and i worry that if it keeps rising my heakth would be affected but im starting to now worry as much because im managing stress and meditate, my bp gets lower about 130 or less / 90 or less...so im not sure if it could be ocd because i dont feel the urge to measure it all the time, its fear that causes me to want to measure because i keep wondering what if its high or the stress got to me even if i dont feel super stressed, but now im starting to feel more comfortable, im going to try for atleast these 3 days and see what happens

[Hidden]

just a thought. Taking the bp so much out of worry is probably what makes it go up. If you lay off a bit I would bet it will go down in general. Also it may be fine most of the day and only up when you take it because of the anticipation of it. i'm a nurse and we see that all the time. You are young and healthy so no reason to worry now. I understand its the anxiety pushing you to do it. Accept the reality of it and repeat that to yourself and maybe that will help. Doing good!

[Kevin160 in reply to Hidden]

Yes thats why im doing this, because im thinking this could be white coat syndrome because i dont suffer hypertension but i just worry because a few times since it would be elevated ..its just from stress but i want to get over it because its bothering me that much, we will see

[Kevin160 in reply to Kevin160]

Thanks for the help though really appreciate it

[Calm_mama]

Hey Kevin!

What your doc said is really sticking in your mind isn't it? There was a seed planted that day and it's been growing...

No problem- in the future you will have learned enough about your anxiety and how it works to let those kinds of seedlings die of neglect but in the meantime I want to share something with you!

Docs follow guidelines on fairly aggressive cardiovascular risk reduction and prevention. The overarching theme over the last couple of decades has been, basically and generally, Americans are eating poorly, not exercising enough, are carrying around too much weight, some are still smoking, and as a result their modifiable risk factors (BP being one of them) are not well-enough controlled. As a result of the movement to address this, docs are on the front line for interactions with people to try to improve the issue. They have been taught to discuss prevention at every visit. They have been taught to hammer home the messages, "Do you think you can eat better?, let's get you down 5-10 lbs, I'd like to see you do 20-30 min exercise every day, let's get that BP down" etc. These messages can be appropriate and helpful, but they are blanket messages and usually not individualized or personalized. The result is that sometimes people who are doing just fine are told things they don't need to hear. Add to this that the messages are often given to people without much support to help them follow through . In other words, "eat better" means "sorry, I'd like to help but you have to figure it out." Providers may have a handout, or direct people to a website, or suggest a nutritionist. But people can't make huge changes like dietary changes without more education and ongoing support. That's difficult stuff to change. Since providers' hands are tied in that they often don't have the resources to support /facilitate change, some talk to their patients a little longer about this stuff, and some give their messages more firmly because that's all they can do. Not all docs of course- I'm generalizing.

Add to this the fact that some providers are now getting paid based on measured outcomes. "Pay for performance". They have a panel of X number of patients, and values like weight, BP, glucose, cholesterol etc get monitored over time. Docs who get their patients' risk factors down over time might get paid more.

Add to this that most docs are very caring people who really want to do the right thing. They mean well and want to help!

NOW ADD TO THAT that most providers have very little experience in communicating with patients who have anxiety/health anxiety, and we can see why your doc said what he/she said.

What your doc said to you was in some context somewhere, the right message. BUT it was just given to the wrong person at the wrong time. Docs are humans. They do a darned good job and in general, I really, really trust doctors. But they are humans and don't get their messages 100% right, 100% of the time. That's all that happened with your doc...

As you get better at understanding how your anxiety works, you'll be able to tease out messages like this one that you got, no problem. You will be able to put them in the right perspective much more easily.

A provider didn't instruct you to take your BP of course and taking your BP is totally unnecessary. There is no place for home BP monitoring in a 17-year old with excellent BP and no risk factors. Try to get some regular exercise and eat green salads with chicken It's OK for you to completely let go of BP as something to focus on. Your arteries are as flexible and bouncy as a trampoline. Mine are probably more like a wooden floor (stiffer- I'm older, ha ha!). Trampoline is better! Nah I do OK with my own risk reduction But the stress piece of it- That I DON'T worry about. And as we'd expect with paradoxical anxiety, the more I don't worry about whether or not stress is bad for me, the less stressed I am.. I could say more about BP goals, variability, how people who stress about their BP specifically should not be checking home BP readings b/c the readings aren't very accurate, etc.. I could remind you about how "checking for reassurance" keeps anxiety awake and on high alert... but this reply has gone on long enough!

So when you're ready, post a pic of your BP monitor in the trash Better yet- recycle it. Or give it to someone who can truly benefit from its use! After a while, your anxiety about your BP will die of neglect...

PS When I was pregnant with my first daughter I had my own doppler and listened to her heartbeat every day for hours. I'd miscarried before. I was an anxious mess. I'd call my OB for any little variation in what I expected. This doc was ready to absolutely kill me. Please know I have the utmost understanding and empathy for what you and your anxiety are going through right now 🤗

[Kevin160 in reply to Calm_mama]

That was lovely to hear, ofcourse i dont blame the doctor, it sort of happened after i had gotten a panic attack that day , and the bp device was beside me and it said 150/100 which is not crazy high but for me i would get 100/70 range, it made me think that this is a bad thing and i didnt know what i do know , that this is t crazy high and it doesnt mean there is something wrong with me , and now that i do its much easier to calm, i still get anxious thinking about it because of the physical symptoms and just knowing its there in my mind , but i feel better, you are really kind for sharing your experience with the doppler, i used to worry much more than now which i guess is progress, i put it somewhere i cant reach and now im going to go sleep without measuring my bp , i get some heart palpitations but i know its fine ..i have a headache but im doing well, i know deep down im fine but its become sort of like a habit but since i know it doesnt get so high and im safe, even though its annoying and imthink about it alot, i need to ditch the monitor and get used to it, so im going to do that..its scary because i would usually begin to wonder what if its elevated, what if i get a panic attack because i otherthink and cant know exactly if im fine , but i feel my strongest in months , so i guess now is the best time, ive taken meditation and stuff so i decided to manage the root of the problem, which is the anxiety over the dumb things , i started meditating and doing light exercise, its helping i feel less tired all the time, i was just worried that stress doesnt go but i realized it is going away or atleast fading a bit, and i can deal with that..i hope i doesnt go downhill again , thank you calm mama you are incredible, you were one of the first people to talk to me and make me feel welcome, i dont know what i would have done if i didnt get into this website by accident trying to find ways to reduce axiety and coming across this , maybe its a sign or something because it was really a great coincedense...i used to worry so much now i still worry but i stopped getting physical symptoms, i stopped losing control even when panicking i can just calm a bit and tell myself im fine, i can actually calm down even when its hard to..im going to see how these few days go ,

[Calm_mama in reply to Kevin160]

Sounds like you are doing awesome So very happy for you that you are finding your way!

[AZ1970]

Way to go! You are taking the power away from the monitor and giving it back to yourself.

[Kevin160 in reply to AZ1970]

Yes thats the plan , thank you

[Mehditate]

Facing the fear is the only way to normalize and beat it. I just finished a lesson in a course I am taking about it. Kevin you are very brave brother and I commend you for doing it ! Keep in mind, that it is perfectly natural to worry, but keep challenging the worry while doing relaxation exercises. You are doing great!

[Kevin160 in reply to Mehditate]

I will dont worry, thanks <3

[likachika]

Are you sure your blood pressure monitor is accurate? I took mine on my former one and it said 160/88. I was shocked by how high that was.

But then my dad (he used to be an EMT) took it during a panic attack, and it was 118/82. I had another huge panic attack today at the doctor’s office and it was 112/80. At home blood pressure monitors aren’t exactly accurate, to say the least.

Perhaps, if your parents are supportive enough, ask them to take your blood pressure manually. It’s fairly easy to do with a cuff and stethoscope, and a YouTube tutorial should be able to show them how.

Best of luck to you.

[Kevin160 in reply to likachika]

My family is no where near supportive, but ya that could be a possibility that its not accurate im not sure if it is, but it rises when im stressed on the monitor and when im relaxed its usually low , i dont know honestly but i just want to ditch it all because i dont need to measure it that much and when its elevated i stress out over nothing