Its been a week and i still get these daily headaches , im always stressed , anxious, i feel these heart palpitations all the time, its frustrating and so tiring to just feel like this all the time, whenever i get over an obstacle another one strikes, and in most cases they just pile up on top of each other
I try to be patient, i try to be positive but its so damn hard when every step forward i get 20 steps back, this whole thing mostly started in december and i still feel terrible , it gets better sometimes but i still feel like im dying most of the time, im tired , have nausea, lack of appetite, its just super frustrating, i get moments where its like super easy to feel optimistic but then other times i feel frightened over the thought of leaving my bed, i just dont know what to do , everytime i try something it either backfires or doesnt work , and i know deep down im fine and its silly but i feel like i dont have control over my body, my vision sucks , i keep getting migraines and on top of that everything in my life is just pressuring me more and more , like i seriously feel nothing else can go worse, i cant go a day without panicking or worrying, yes i cant ignore that i made progress but i feel like im going to die sometimes because of all the symptoms and fear, it hasnt been 2 months yet but i just feel that this constant anxiety has taken over, and it sucks honestly , im sorry i dont mean to just rant over this ,
I always remind myself im in a much better situations, im physically healthy and my life is ok i guess, but i just wish that i didnt worry this much over stress, its the same cycle , because i remember how terrible it feels to be this anxious, i stress over it , and it goes on ..my bp doesnt even rise that much with stress because im young and healthy, there is not even a reason i should be that worried, i know its normal but i just cant seem to think about the present, i keep thinking that if i stay like this in the future i will get a stroke or a heart attack, i will never lead a normal life, i will never do the things i want to do, everyone will go on without me , i get these thoughts that even when i try to ignore my body reacts to them ..i tried alot and it helps temporarily then sometimes i feel totally down sometimes just for thinking about my future or my past, nothing seems positive , everything looks scary , between what im going through and what i will go through , i just want to go back in time but at the same time i still want to have the knowledge and growth i learnt from this experience, but i just get better for a while then feel horrible the next..and no one in my family is being supportive currently, litteraly no one im always alone and its hard to stay distracted ... im sorry again im not looking for advices or pitty i just felt the need to express how i feel because its making me feel better
The things making me feel calmer are things like knowing if it goes downhill i can suck it up and start meds ..although thats my fear to go this bad but meh
That my bp doesnt rise that much even with anxiety so i dont think i will die from a bp of 140/90 and it goes down whenever i breath deeply and check again
That my fears are irrational and i always find a solution for all my problems before..i just know it needs time and that is something i need to face, as many advices i got i have all that in my head its just easier said than done, im trying though i am and im happy with my progress its just frustrating when u take a few steps back when u feel proud after all the progress
Meds are given to some people, some times, when they are struggling. It's a decision between you and the doc. They can really nudge people. My daughter is on an SSRI and when she started it, got a fantastic nudge from it. I was on an SSRI at one point and frankly should have stuck it out, but didn't. I would take it again in a heartbeat if I needed it.
It has reached that point for me on several occasions. 
Girlfriend crying for "no reason"
