Mild anxiety

[Kevin160]

Hey everyone

So far im doing ok , much much better than before, i actually almost feel normal , this past month i had only one panic attack , and i had constant panic and anxiety for about a week at the end of february , and i had a couple days last week where i had a few anxiety attacks ...although im doing better , i still overthink and feel like im living more in my head and thought rather in the real world

I just feel the blues , im enjoying life and appreciating every second where i dont feel stress, but i just feel sad or not finding the joy in things ..and i get depressive thoughts about death and what happens next , or when i grow up, or about life and the future in general, yes it can turn out amazing ..but who knows

Again im beyond happy about all the stress free days im having , and im not complaining actually even when i get these thoughts im somehow relaxed , although sometimes i feel heart palpitations and need to remind myself that all the constant stress or panic is never harmless , these are just emotions

For example when i went to the ER due to the flu and an ear infection , he measured my bp where i had anxiety about because it tends to rise with stress, it was 140/75 i believe , which was actually pretty amazing , as i was deep breathing the whole way there trying to prove myself that i can handle stress, but its becoming sort of fear that i wont handle stress, i have things this year such as exam results and things that sound silly to some but will determine my future , and i just worry more about the panic i might experience and stress that i fear i wont be able to control and i know i dont need to but its mire than the situation itself ..

I just worry sometimes over things that are nor a big deal , such as having cold hands , or like cold fingers and some fingers being warm , having sore ribs , feeling my legs and arms getting tingly , getting migraines with aura

I guess my fear now is that i will lose the progress and go back to my blood pressure obsession considering although i havent measured it since i went to the ER , i havent did so before 2 or 3 weeks , and im proud of that , but i know my brain will keep coming up with thoughts such as you will die of a heart attack, or that the deep breathing and relaxation techniques you depend on to make sure panic doesnt cause your bp to rise are nit affective, or that your bp will start to rise often , stuff like that ;(

Again this is nit meant to be a negative post, i made alot lf progress and i can actually live nirmally, i go out without fear and i dont do almost all of the habits i was obsessed of such as pulse and bp checking, constant panic, its almost a month since i last felt that and i feel freedom at last , hoping it will stay that way , but i worry a migraine attack or a panic attack or something scary will make me take steps back

[Vjeko]

That is great, it looks like your body and mind are slowly coming back to balance, less worry and more peace, great stuff

[Kevin160 in reply to Vjeko]

Yes i guess so , i try to keep thinking anxiety is harmless, although it causes blood to clot differently , it can damage arteries and organs , i try to think that i will be fine , but thats the only thing that really bothers me , that i have to accept the anxiety i shouldnt fight it or it gets worse , but i try my best to not let it control me and prove myself that i wil be fine

[Vjeko in reply to Kevin160]

Well, could be in some degree, but my opinion is it is more that worryng mind is trying to find another thing to worry about that cannot be easily dismissed. It is far more healthy not to worry about it if you can, because then you are stepping out of the closed circle (wich is: worry about health state - that causes health state to get worse - that is reason more to worry about and so on). Hope this makes sense and helps.

[Kevin160 in reply to Vjeko]

Yes i see where you are coming from thank you

[JAYnLA]

You sound great, Kevin - I loved reading about your progress. It's continually a relief to discover, over and over, that we all go through such similar challenges. But we get through them every time - and that's the most important thing. Thanks for sharing yourself with us!

[Jeff1943]

You're still fighting, fighting, fighting, you are still fearing, fearing, fearing. Fighting causes more stress and tension, fearing causes more fear hormone to flood your nervous system maintaining it in a state of over sensitivity.

To fully recover you have to accept all these symptoms for the time being, that's all. Forget about cataloguing each symptom, that's too much introspection. Face the fact that you have these symptoms, yes, but concentrate your attention on getting your nervous system free of sensitisation. Do that and all the uncomfortable feelings and bad thoughts will desert you.

It's all in that book, how understanding and reassurance can make Acceptance a reality.

Acceptance is hard but going through what you are going through is much harder.

[Kevin160 in reply to Jeff1943]

Well, for now im really not letting it bother me , its not the anxiety its the thoughts, and thats fine by me i dont mind them alot.

Im doing so and although its working , anxiety may not be as harmless as you keep saying , it affects how blood clots, and the fear hormones youre talking about can damage arteries and organs even if you “accept anxiety”

Youre right , It does make it easier to cope with anxiety and i feel better and calmer more often, but accepting it is not as easy and effective as you might think

[Kevin160 in reply to Jeff1943]

Again yes its important and it helps , but still anxiety is HARMFUL, maybe not directly, and on the long run , but constant panic and anxiety can damage the health , as it increases blood pressure, pulse, causes the immune system to get damaged , changed the way blood clots , and increases cholesterol and fat concentration , strokes and heart attacks can be caused , im not saying now , for teens or young people, but at some point people die from stress all the time, i knew people who died when facing a tragedy or a grief or something , i knew people who were skinny and healthy, but depression and panic disorder caused them to get heart attacks amd strokes at young age , i knew a friend who died after failing and not being able graduate in time , too much pressure and panic caused a heart attack and couldnt make it to the hospital in time...physically healthy , skinny, healthy bmi etc...

[Jeff1943 in reply to Kevin160]

Shame on you Kevin160. Did you give any thought to the effect your alarmist words would have on people here suffering high levels of anxiety?

You tell them that anxiety causes blood clots, strokes, damage to arteries and organs, heart attacks, high blood pressure and will damage their immune system!

We are here to support one another not to frighten the life out of each other.

If anxiety is so lethal as you suggest then all of us here should have died long ago. But we haven't.

An otherwise healthy body can withstand anxiety without the horrors you describe year after year after year. During World War Two millions lived in a state of high anxiety for years without dropping dead.

You say that Acceptance is not as effective as I might think. You know nothing about the effectiveness of Claire Weekes' method, Kevin160, because you have never bothered to read her book.

"Anxiety is HARMFUL" you say, the capitals are your's. You can believe what you like about anxiety but consider the effect of your words on people experiencing high degrees of nervous distress when posting here.

[Kevin160 in reply to Jeff1943]

Woah calm down , first of all i didnt disrespect you in any way , second of all im being polite , third of all if you think what i said is the first thing that triggers people here who have health anxiety you are beyond mistaken , i have read things here that gave me panic attacks worse than i had before i came to this website, this is a place to express feelings , and express what im feeling , you just memorize that one sentence that you say every single time i post something or i see a post about anyone ....”accept it” ...im just giving my opinion that you are not a god and know everything 100%, yes there are cases that people died from anxiety

All the comments here are positive and say how far my progress is except yours that is always just telling my good old “accepting”

When are you going to accept that people here dont just look for advice, they need help and support and just to hear things that motivate them to keep going

Im not to thrilled to say what i said but its true, reports , actual facts states that anxiety has its affects, and just because it didnt happen to some people here , although it did to some im pretty sure , doesnt mean you just dismiss it

[Kevin160 in reply to Jeff1943]

You are too worried about what some other people with anxiety can read my comment , i have the right to express what i feel, i meant that in my opinion it is helpful but its not the only solution and thing that helps anxiety, u didnt even read what i said, i didnt sai its not effective, it helped me alot to accept my symptoms and not worry about them ..but seeing actual real life events of something that indicated how anxiety can be harmful made me realize you could be wrong, what can make you so sure that every human on earth wont die with extreme anxiety ...you just dismiss the question and keep saying other dont die from it , you dont justify or explain ...so no ...no shame on me , im entitled of an opinion , you are welcome to correct me , if not , let me vent how i like and just spare me your comments , again all due respect ..unlike what you shown me

[Kevin160 in reply to Jeff1943]

Funny how you say we are here to support one another and yet when i post anything all i find from you is critisism that im not doing well enough , and that i still need to do this and that , im also frightened and have high level of anxiety , and all intended for was to get answers, you explained something about the fear hormones,..this is a website for knowing things and expressing ones situation , for me my only problem is thinking that anxiety is harmful..when i thought it wasnt these past 3 weeks have been like heaven , because i knew regardless what happens im fine , but what happened to me this week and realizing the affect of stress on me and people close to me and how some died showed me im wrong , it made me feel anxious again

[Kevin160 in reply to Jeff1943]

Im not that worried over any symptom , im just explaining how i feel, i actually havent been worried about symptoms like before, but sometimes your brain comes up with things and you dont even worry about them but they are just there , im doing ok so far but im stating facts

[Vjeko in reply to Jeff1943]

If you really want to help someone, the worst way to do it is by telling him/her what to do or should do (even if it is something as good as floating through anxiety advice). There is no recepy for getting out of these states. Everybody has to develop his own feel and strategy for getting through. IMO, best one can do is honestly describe what helped him in these situations, and if it resonates great, if it doesn't, hope some other time, or something else will.

[Jeff1943 in reply to Vjeko]

I totally disagree with you, Vjeko. The very best way to help someone is to suggest to them what to do (so long as it is complimentary to any professional therapy they are receiving).

People come to this forum to learn from the knowledge and experience of others with similar mental health problems.

I give you my personal guarantee that endlessly listing your symptoms and getting hug-hug sympathy replies is not going to cure you of Anxiety Disorder. Recovery has little to do with the symptoms, it has everything to do with over-sensitisation of the nervous system and how to resolve it.

I disagree with you when you say there is no recipe for getting out of these states. Everybody can recover from Anxiety Disorder no matter how long or how deeply they have suffered.

Medication brings respite but not recovery. Never-the-less it has an important role to play. Talking therapy can be highly effective if you find a good therapist. And there is a rich literature of self-help methods written by people who know what they're talking about. The one whose method I recommend is the Acceptance method devised by Doctor Claire Weekes, a psychiatrist. My interest is to suggest to people to read about her method and apply it to their lives. Untold thousands have recovered from Anxiety Disorder since her first book was published 50 years ago: that is why it is still in print today in its 44th. reprint.

So I repeat that contrary to what you say people are crying out to be told what to do and that is what I have been doing here on a daily basis for over two years. I notice you only joined yesterday.

[Kevin160 in reply to Jeff1943]

Ok and i agree with this ..im not coming here for just a cure, and im not listing my symptoms only..we all here need to vent every once in a while because we dont have people who actually understand what we go through..for me its not just about getting help its about getting support and feeling like someone has been through the same things as me ..

[Vjeko in reply to Jeff1943]

Hi Jeff1943

Of course they don't need you (or anybody else) to tell them what to do. They are crying out because they are in desperate states when they come here, and only valid advice we can give them is to find professional help if they can. Be humble, polite and respectful. People feel very bad and mostly need some comfort, some relief and somebody to talk to, and that is why they come to sites like this. Then they become an easy catch for wannabe therapeuts like you are.

[Jeff1943 in reply to Vjeko]

People on this forum offer each other more than just the advice to go seek professional help. They may offer advice on meds they have taken or different therapies or a particular self-help book they found beneficial. If someone new here hasn't yet seen their doctor then that is always the first thing we advise people to do.

It's sad that you think people who go out of their way to help others towards recovery are doing it for some selfish or egotistical motive: that they are looking for "easy catches" and are "wannabe therapeuts". Maybe you have a rather jaundiced view of humanity.

Kevin's explicit post on the dire consequences of anxiety could be most unnerving for many suffering from anxiety disorder and I told him so. Posting messages that can distress others is against Health Unlimited guidelines. And it doesn't get much more distressing than telling people they're in line for a stroke, heart attack, blood clots etc.

Of course people are crying out to be told what to do. How often we hear those very words here: "What shall I do?"

[Vjeko in reply to Jeff1943]

No, I didn' say that people do it for selfish reasons, but it seems to me from your posts that you do. You have found "stuff that really works" (because it worked dor you and many other people) and that's it! Now you are on the mission to convince as many as possible on that. It just doesn't wotk that way! Are you aware how much that attitude is dangerous? It is a kind of fanatism and caused wars betveen nations and religions in human history. You can say: see this thing relly helped me, or my friend or something like that, but saying: you should stop whining and do this or that, it's complete disaster imho. And, excuse me for not having enough respect for veteran on this site, but you just can't say "shame on you" to someone who is suffering from severe anxiety on site like this.

[Kevin160 in reply to Vjeko]

And vjeko, thank you so much for trying to help , i apprciate it aloot , you are very kind and i wish you all the best , but no need to get involved , its ok ..i dont want you both to insult one another or get involved in a site that is meant to support one another ..

What i wanted was an answer , i guess i explained the question harshly maybe some people who view it who are already stressed can affect them negatively and i should have probably worded it differently , but still the reponse wasnt very nice to hear, although its fine ...

[Jeff1943 in reply to Vjeko]

What are we to think of you, Vjeko. Within 24 hours of joining this forum you start an acrimonious argument. First I am a "wannabe therapeuts" looking for "easy catches" which you have now escalated to calling me a "fanatic" who causes "wars".

Vjeko, this is not the behaviour of a rational human being. It has all the hallmarks of a troll who goes from forum to forum and loves causing arguments. We have had them here before.

Either that or you are a very troubled person with confrontational tendencies that urgently need addressing.

I will speak to you again when you have 225 followers. Maybe.

[Vjeko in reply to Jeff1943]

You just can't take it.

[Kevin160 in reply to Jeff1943]

Look fine, maybe the whole “anxiety is harmful” and explanation was unnecessary , but im aware that some people might get triggered, but honestly saying it violates guidelines is wrong , and i have seen many people discussing similar topics ..you cant just tell them they cant discuss their worried even if it might scare others, i know you want to help and i appreciate it , my concern is that im worried i would lose control, and because the symptoms are too strong and im told many times stress is harmful, and seeing for myself people who have been affected by it made me realize that maybe its not impossible for it to affect me , and this caused me to become more anxious because all this acceptiing the symptoms and panicking as much as i need without holding it in or trying to control made me think im a goner , and dr google isnt very helpful telling me all the bad effects of anxiety and panic disorder , i thought i might die someday , if not now later ..so i hope you understand where i was coming from , as i said more that once i didnt only require advice , since im doing much better i only expect communication with people and hear their feedback, its motivating to keep going,

I appreciate the help but i would like it if you would try and be more understanding of my situation and others because sometimes you come as harsh ...

[Jeff1943 in reply to Kevin160]

Sorry for the upset Kevin, sometimes we shoot from the hip, but I did think your post about the consequences of anxiety could be upsetting for some.

If I have come across as harsh then do be assured that it is only 'tough love'. If I am repetitive about acceptance then it is because in 45 years it is the only remedy I know of that works whether conveyed in a book or by a professional therapist. I know of nothing else, very little about medications and although people say that Claire Weekes was a pioneer of Cognitive Behavioural Therapy when I went for CBT therapy at the Priory Clinic I couldn't understand a word of it. Though I know it has benefited others greatly.

You have clearly made progress which I know you will build on and wish you all speed on your road to recovery.

[Kevin160 in reply to Jeff1943]

Thank you so much, its no ones fault , i guess this is just a misunderstanding, i know what you mean and you only want to help , you helped me alot , and its true that accepting the symptoms is much better than fighting it and trying to distract myself because it will only make it worse, i guess sometimes i feel its too hard or im not doing it right , and i hate how my perspective and views always change , i didnt believe anxiety was harmless because of all the events going on around me especially on my mother (she had alot of stress and health issues and one day she got a heart attack ..then i saw all the people here saying that they had severe anxiety and panic disorder for years and they never had any physical health affects , and for me getting physical symptoms, severe migraines , intense pain from the anxiety made me not know what to believe , and without going into too much detail ..i knew alot of people who i believe anxiety caused their health to worsen , but i dont know what to believe , its the only thing that i believe can help me calm because even when i try to accept the symptoms , its hard when you think something you are accepting and allowing to happen is not good for you , and it makes it that much harder , and im more worried that i would get a sudden fright or panic that will cause me to lose control , such as my A levels this year, my anxiety started because i heard about a friend who died as a result of the fright they receieved when failing and not graduating , im just frightened that what if all the suspense and pressure and anxiety and panic this year will eventually cause me to crack , first it was blood pressure anxiety , i got over that now i barely measure my blood pressure and it has been weeks since it was high or i even thought about it ..then me realizing that i cant stop panicking even when the trigger is gone , realizing this was a chronic problem , with all the pressure this year and now its too hard , i feel everything is fine but i will lose control over nothing and eventhough the worst that can happen everything will be fine i think i will crumble and panic over nothing and my brain will act on its own and i will try to accept the anxiety and panic but it would be too hard for my body to handle it , everyone says that i wont die , then i hear some random story that changes all the positive thoughts i built and it happens over and over again and its soooo exshuasting

[Kevin160 in reply to Jeff1943]

Like for example i had constant anxiety for about 2months, then when i started realizing the truth tthat my fears were irrational im not dying and stress is not harmful , i became calm for almost 3 weeks and they were the best 3 weeks in 2019 ever , i felt the modt free , but now when i started thinking otherwise , im a bit back to the spiral of overthinking and what ifs and stuff, so im not even sure this is an actual chronic problem , i dont panic except when there is a trigger or a scarry situation , but honestly when you worry about somethijg everything sort of becomes scary , and your mind shifts about things alot worrying about anything you see hear touch feel , and do , meet and read ...

[Jeff1943 in reply to Kevin160]

I understand what you're saying Kevin and yes you do rather indulge in too much introspection but that's the anxiety talking, it exaggerates small molehill problems into mountain problems. My fear is the satnav packing up and I don't know where I'm going, so I carry a spare satnav in the boot. My grandsons think it's hilarious driving around with two satnavs, nobody else in the U.K. does that except me but my anxiety is mild and controlled compared to many.

The thing about the A word is that I can't explain it so well as Doctor Weekes does herself in her book, I know at your time in life every quid or buck counts but you can pick a used one up on Amazon or Ebay for the price of a Big Mac with Bacon. Failing that YouTube has a couple of hour long videos with Claire Weekes explaining her stuff. I won't mention the A word again. But I'll look out for your posts, promise.

[Calm_mama]

Great to hear from you Kevin! You are making really good progress !! 👍🏻