new here

Hi all, I am feeling very flat right now. I am not in the mood to view anyone's posts or even to feel better. Shitty, right? I know it's not the way to snap out of it. I also know that I can't just snap out of it, that I do need to coach myself and try to change my attitudes etc. etc. But at this moment in time I feel like indulging myself.

I am not in the mood to try to encourage anyone or to help anyone. I know that this does not help my mood. I am not in the mood to exercise. I am in the mood to get into bed and cover and watch tv all day. I know that this will only make it worse. I do not want to restart an antidepression med. I had been on Effexor but felt that it kept me up at night and possibly potentiated a vertigo type of issue I was having. I withdrew, horribly from it, bc I did not follow the directions of decreasing the dose. That was over a year ago. My husband seems to be depressed and that depresses me but I have to get over him bc that is another one of my issues, focusing on others bc I don't want to focus on myself. I am going through menopause and I have quit smoking and I am in my head all day long which is not a great place to be. I think I came here today just to sound off and I shouldn't even post this bc I know its very depressing and selfish. I know I can do better. I know if I just force myself to get up and take a shower I will feel slightly better. I know that if I go to get my nails done and do something I will feel better. I have to get this off my chest. I have $. I'm not rich or anything but my husband and I make enough money to do what we want. We don't have kids and that means no debt, I guess. But we haven't done anything with the house which is not falling apart, well the front is but we haven't done anything about it. my sister says every $#@& time she drives up that we have to fix the front porch. it is giving me angina right now bc I know my husband will say the weather, the $, the this, the that. He procrastinates so @$#%& bad it sucks the life out of me. See there I go again, blaming him for everything. I just don't want to fight and I don't have the energy for "discussing it" with him.

[Iloveart7]

Welcome!

[hypercat54]

H nice to meet you and welcome to the site. You don't have to be able to help others all of the time as sometimes we can't even help ourselves and that's ok. I hope you feel a bit better now you have got all this off your chest.

Oh just one thing - swearing isn't allowed on here so can you edit it out please. Thank you. x

[Hidden in reply to hypercat54]

Thanks for your response as well as letting me know about profanity. I tend to swear a lot and and know that I shouldn’t. So sorry for having offended anyone.

[nv220]

Hello! I am new here but I just want to let you know that it is okay to not be okay sometimes and It is normal to get in a rut when multiple cards are stacked against you. My mom is also going through menopause and she says it is like a milestone in her adult life so I cannot even imagine the stress you are going through. You have great insight into your feelings so even if you feel like everything is out of control you are taking the appropriate steps towards empowering yourself and finding the lifestyle that sparks joy. Hope your day gets a little better! Maybe do some leisurely painting if you need something to get lost in. Much love!

[Hidden]

Thanks. Very kind of you.

[Strongheartforever]

If you have the money to go to a private doctor, or if you have insurance, get a Functional medicine doctor and get BHRT. Your fluctuating hormones can be balanced and you won’t feel that “flat” feeling anymore. Bio identical hormone replacement therapy is plant-derived and easily recognized by the body. Also, when estrogen leaves so does magnesium, so take a supplement, and b-6 and b-12 can also help your mood. Dr Christiane Northrup has tons of ideas for having vibrant health throughout the change. Just some ideas... xx

[leopardluvr]

It’s okay to be selfish sometimes. A strategy I’ve heard before is to give yourself exactly one hour (set a timer) to mope, feel sorry for yourself, cry, hide in bed, etc. After that hour is up (or your show is over), you HAVE to get up and do something. It could be small like just taking a shower, or getting your nails done. But it’s good to let yourself feel the way you feel and then decide to focus on other things!

[leopardluvr in reply to leopardluvr]

Side note; there are other antidepressant medications that affect you in different ways. It might be worth giving it a try. Or maybe ask your doctor about St. John’s wart, or 5-htp. Those have been proven to help your mood and are powerful enough that you can’t take them at the same time as an SSRI

[art62grammie]

When we feel defeated due to depression. We get up and fight. FIGHT.