Some days instead of feeling b... - Anxiety and Depre...

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Some days instead of feeling b...

28 Replies

Some days instead of feeling better... I log off this place with a really heavy heart and pressurised 😔 ... ... sometimes I overthink it too much. Especially after replying to peoples posts I’ll always think ‘did I help or make it worse’. If someone doesn’t respond back to my reply I’ll keep thinking ‘did I push them off the edge or have I helped ??)

Sometimes the problems are so serious I feel so scared because what if my words make it worse for them...

Just feels like I’m not enough.

Sorry for the downer 😢

28 Replies

What makes you feel that way? I don't think people would like to see you leave, in fact I'd love to get to know you better! I'm sending you my joy. Love, peace, light & hugs for you!

in reply to

Im not leaving lol I worded it completely wrong! I need to edit it x

in reply to

Oh thank goodness, new tech, at my age I have some trouble with it, hahaha!Have a beautiful day! Love, peace, light, joy & hugs for you!

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight

You have every right to feel that way. Valid feelings. For one I’ve always felt you were way enough (((((((((((((( ❤️))))))))))))))) love you!

in reply toStarrlight

Aw thank you x I think I need to edit my post and explain it in more details xx

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to

I hear ya! I overthink things too. I’m sensitive so I think what if the person misunderstood etc etc

fauxartist profile image
fauxartist

what do you mean Hope.... you leave the site feeling that way? and why my friend, what is it that makes you feel that way....

in reply tofauxartist

I just feel like maybe I didn’t help or did I make people feel worse. Especially when a new person posts once and never again I always overthink it a lot. Did i make it worse or what. Its my own issue really nobody else’s fault at all

fauxartist profile image
fauxartist in reply to

I understand what your saying and I'll tell you what I was told by a very wise friend...we can't help everyone, and as much as we try, there is always going to be the odd time when someone does not take what we offer as advice the right way. We cannot help that. And many come on the site...kind of just put up something, don't hear what they want to hear, and just go away. Or some just post and don't respond, to me that is kind of rude, but it is what it is....so don't take that on board as any reflection on you, it's on them....and know that in your heart, you tried to do the right thing honey. And that's good enough.

in reply tofauxartist

Thank you for sharing that with me it helps me a lot x and of course I’m not being judgemental or anything to others I understand I have a problem of overthinking too much x

fauxartist profile image
fauxartist in reply to

nope your not judgemental at all...just got that hamster wheel of over-thinking goin on in yer head my friend....welcome to my world some days.... was doing that yesterday....it's all good....your in the right place .... a lot of us, including me, go through the same kinds of stuff... your okay honey..it's just part of who we are.

You have a lot of love and support comin your way...

in reply tofauxartist

Goodness me my mind hamster must eat some special powered food because its been running nonstop for years now! Hehe x

Thank you ! You always know exactly what to say x

kenster1 profile image
kenster1

I would love to see you stay I really would.you really are great in your support to people on here if you need support then it help being on here as well.if something has happened to make you feel this way chat to someone you trust about it but please think about it.you are a valued member on here.

in reply tokenster1

Hey Kenster no I think I worded it wrongly. I mean sometimes I come on here and I don’t know how to help people and don’t know what the right words are to say to people. And some problems that people have are so serious I never know how to respond to them because I’m scared that I might make it worse. So then I log off (not leave) with a heavy heart and a lot of guilt (should I have said anything, did I say the wrong thing, did I say too much, etc) because sometimes I don’t hear back after the first initial post. This makes me overthink about whether i made the situation worse or better.

These are my own issues and nobody else’s fault x

kenster1 profile image
kenster1 in reply to

hey glad your staying then.your heart is in the right place in wanting to reach out but its virtually impossible for most of us to find the answers and solutions to everyones problems don't get down about it be proud of yourself for reaching to others and offering help when we could be doing with some ourselves.you do a great job on here that's for sure.

BlueBelle06 profile image
BlueBelle06

It sounds like you are very empathetic and care about others a lot. You sound like a great person. I think everyone appreciates anyone trying to help.

in reply toBlueBelle06

Aw thank you x I didn’t express my feelings to gain sympathy or compliments at all. It was just today I was feeling it a lit more than usual and when I tell people how I’m feeling on here I usually end up feeling better afterwards x

Eowyn7 profile image
Eowyn7

I think as long as you have good intentions it is better to try than not to try. I know for me the worst thing is feeling ignored like nobody cares enough to reply. That is why I always try to reply when I see posts with no comments. Even if you don't say exactly the right thing, at least the person will feel heard.

in reply toEowyn7

Yes you’re right x I will remember your advice thank you x

aaronm profile image
aaronm

Well I think your really nice and the love and compassion you've shown to me has been really great. I appreciate that. Your doing great here!

in reply toaaronm

Thank you for your reassurance x

Dearest Hope..

Your caring nature shines through.

We ourselves are often not well, but still like to try to help others...because we care..

It’s such a shame at times when we are helping we feel it’s not good enough for one reason or another..it’s sad we can have a heavy heart around it and I understand just what you mean...

We are not responsible for others actions or to make them happy, we are always kind and caring and that’s what counts...

I thought about this sort of thing a while back, and came to the conclusion that my first responsibility is me, for without my well being I’m not able to reply...and when I do reply , I do so with caring and kindness and I can’t ask any more of myself...

You are always very kind hope..and kindness is precious to others ..

Hope what I say makes sense...it is something I’ve considered too, maybe I’ve nit written out just what I mean too well, but hope you get the jist of it,,,,

Every good wish to you 🌺🌺🌺🌺 xxx

in reply to

You have written it out perfectly and I understand x thank you for responding it’s helped me x

in reply to

Oh that’s good. 😊

You don’t deserve to suffer...in any way ❤️❤️ Xx

in reply to

💕 you’re so sweet. How are you today x

in reply to

Thank you 😊

I’m not to bad hope..

Grateful for the times that are ok...

I tend to be a bit up and down...

Off out for breakfast this morning, looking forward to that 😊

I hope you have a nice day xx🌺🌺🌺

NCAQuilter profile image
NCAQuilter

Please don't feel sorry for the downer. We all have them, and this site was made for downers. Otherwise, who would we have to help?

When someone asks for help, I think it is better to try, than to ignore. Trying may help, while not trying can't help. Give what you know, the best way you can. If you do that, it's so much more help they've gotten here, than before they came to us. And, just because they don't answer doesn't necessarily mean you didn't help. A lot of people have a problem saying thank you. And, newbies may not realize we would like acknowledgement of our offers, and that we care enough to worry if they are all right.

A rule I try to go by is, do the best you can with the knowledge you have at the time. Unless you intentionally tried to hurt someone, believe that is how you do act. After you've acted, it does no good to try to rethink it. If you didn't come up to your standards, learn from it. Critique, not criticize. Learn what you could have done better, and use that information in the future. Agonizing over the issue won't help you learn.

Life is a learning process. We get better as we learn from our experiences.

As a professional consultant, I've had all kinds of responses to advice and I've had to learn from my mistakes. Forgiving myself was hard, until I realized I had tried the best I could with the information, knowledge, experience, I had at the time. If I learned where I was lacking, (critique) then I could correct that so as to be better next time. If I had only kept feeling I should have been better (criticizing) then I gave myself no room to get better. Doing our best at the time is truly all any of us can do.

So, critique, learn, forgive. Do your best!

Your Best, Hope, is very good, indeed!

in reply toNCAQuilter

Wow Thank you so much for your advice and sharing your experiences with me . I really do appreciate it and will use it in my life .

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