I need help with anger

[Mikeq]

I’ve lost everything I have and I lost my love cause I’m angry. These past two weeks have been very taxing on me for some reasons I have caused and some reasons I haven’t. But I have really lost my entire life. It stared with my love. And lead to my job my home and my kids... their not my kids but they have been like mine for the last year and half. My problem is we are both very stubborn people and I chose to move out of my house and sell it and move in with her in her house. We have a had a great relationship and really still do but we got into doing a little bit of drugs recently and now we both know we needed to stop. I will admit I’m the culprit of this but we did enjoy it for a while and then let it get out of control some. We recently had an argument where I said I would leave and she called me on it and told me to get out so I did. We have never been physical or anything close to that but we are just very stubborn and hard headed. I guess when I feel hurt I tend to lash out and not let things go and she does the same. I really thought we would be back to home by now but we’re not. And a lot of that is because when I get hurt I say things out of anger and though these are my feelings I have a tendency to maybe go to far with it and not just drop it. I love this woman and her kids more then I do myself and I’m heart broken that it may be over due to me not meeting things go. We don’t fight in front of her kids and really we don’t fight that much at all. But when we have these last two weeks it’s gotten bad and I need help understanding why I can’t just be the level headed one and take a step back even if I’m hurt and sometimes rightfully so but regardless I need to be the one who stops and puts an end to it in a loving way not a mean or spiteful way. Any ideas for me to get my life back and maybe help me understand why I do this would be greatly appreciated. I’m a very outgoing person and this two weeks has sent me into a very bad depression and I need help now...... thank you Mike

[b1b1b1]

I am in the US, and here there are courses in anger management. If you can find one it may be very helpful. Also you can consider couples therapy. If you tell her you are willing to do both of these, she may relent.

[Mikeq in reply to b1b1b1]

She asked me to go with her and I said I would but that was before today when we had a little fight. She says I’m being manipulative and passive aggressive. I’m trying to understand what that means

[b1b1b1 in reply to Mikeq]

couples therapy may help you figure out what she means. Try again, and just don't fight - it does take two to fight. xx

[Mikeq in reply to b1b1b1]

Thank you

[Hidden]

I agree with b1b1b1. There’s hope! Work on yourself to the best of your ability and it will all work out as it’s supposed to. Whether you get back together with your girlfriend or for the next person, work on you! I would also stay away from drugs as they only wreak havoc in people. They cause a lot of tension all the way around. I hope you get some help with your anger issues. Wishing you peace and happiness!

[Mikeq in reply to Hidden]

Thank you for your help. I agree staying away from the drugs is best and we have done that. In the gym daily and feeling good minus not being together but like you said if its meant to be it will be.... Thank you and I hope all is well with you. MikeQ

[Hidden in reply to Mikeq]

I’m good! Thanks for asking! Have a great evening...