Hello all. Just a brief bit of background... I have MDD, PD, and OCD. I also struggle with anorexia. I just recently moved to a new city (for a job) and graduated from college in December. All of this change has made the anxiety so much worse and I don’t know what to do. I’m so far away from all my old support systems. I already started one new job but quit because the panic attacks were so bad I literally could not go in the building. I had to tell everyone I was fired instead of the truth about quitting because of my panic attacks. Now I am set to start a new job in two weeks. But I’m so scared because what if the panic is so bad I can’t keep this job either? I’m a single mother and my savings are gone. If I can’t be successful at this job, I will lose my home, my car, my son; everything. I don’t have health insurance so I can’t afford to see a therapist or go to a psychiatrist unless I can keep a job. My panic attacks are so bad right now, I can’t eat. I can’t sleep. I can’t shower. I can’t leave my bed much less my house. You guys are all I have. Everything I google about “new job jitters” says to think positively. And that’s just a bunch a bull if you ask me, but that could be the depression talking. Every time I try to give myself a pep talk it all sounds so incredibly false that I end up rolling my eyes at myself. I just need to be successful at going to work. That’s all. I just need to not lose my son or my home. And I don’t think any amount of thinking positively can change whether or not you will be fighting that demon that is panic and anxiety.