Again, I am here again. One day, I swear I will bore you.
So why am I here? Yesterday I got offered surgery, to try and help my vision. The chances are it will do nothing, and there's a risk I will lose my vision completely for the small chance it will get better enough to make a noticeable difference. Here's the thing. I agreed to the surgery, signed the consent forms, etc. Yet I feel I was pressured, by my mother.
Recently I have felt... well I think it's obvious how I felt. Absolutely rubbish. Every time I have felt that it was as close as it could come to me doing something other people might regret, but this time, I literally feel I have no choice.
I want to escape, but I can't.
I need something, just something to keep me alive. There is literally nothing. I feel I am mocked and ridiculed, I feel no one actually wants to help me. I feel I am abused. I feel I am scared. I feel...
I don't actually think I even feel anymore.
What should I do? I try get help but people just turn me away. i'm not severe enough. i don't want doctors involved, I don't want therapists. I don't want charities. I just honestly... I am at breaking point.