Had Enough ( Trigger Warning )

[Eian59]

Sorry if this goes on a bit but for the past few years I have been getting worse to the point I am on oxygen all the time. I Also take about 17 tablets in the morning and 7 at night..that's not including nebulizer and pain relief. I see a psychologist but that's not helping much. I was just looking at my tablets this morning and asking myself why I take them.is it so I can sit and do nothing and just exist because that's all there is.

I have had enough of putting on a brave face and pretending I am fine. I am just tired of fighting all the time trying to breathe, I don't want to do it anymore why can't they put me to sleep.If I was a dog they would as there is no quality of life just pain and medication. Sorry to go on but I just don't want to fight. It anymore.

[hypercat54]

Oh I am so sorry you are feeling so down and I do understand that. I have copd and am on the BLF site. Why join it as you might find some tips to help you.

There are number of folk there who are very severe and with other health conditions too. It might make you feel less alone. x

healthunlocked.com/blf

[Eian59 in reply to hypercat54]

Hi thanks for your reply, I am on the BLF site and try to stay positive but it is hard when you're like this. But I will try ,the people on these site's are amazing so much help thanks again for your reply.

Eian

[hypercat54 in reply to Eian59]

Oh sorry I did check first and couldn't see that you were on that site as you haven't posted. As you know they are a very friendly bunch and some in there like me do suffer from depression and/or anxiety too. Put a post up about this and I guarantee you will get lots of support and encouragement too. x

[MAS_Nurse]

Hello Eian59,

Sorry to hear that everything is so hard at the moment. Have you got close family members or friends that are supporting you?

Here is a link for the British Lung Foundation, maybe you have already tried their support line but perhaps they might have some additional advice or suggestions for you? You can also search for support in your area.

blf.org.uk/support-for-you

Otherwise if you just need someone to talk to, who will listen to how you are feeling:

Samaritans: Call 116123

Other members on here too are a great source of support.

We hope you feel more settled soon,

MAS Nurse and Moderator

[Eian59 in reply to MAS_Nurse]

Thank you I am on the BLF Site as well and it helps a bit .I am just bone tired fighting this

every day, but thanks for your reply.

Eian

[hypercat54 in reply to Eian59]

I am only mild copd (but maybe more moderate now) and also suffer from depression of course, a borderline underactive thyroid, and crippling back pain. Even when I can walk a bit better my breathing then suffers so I can't win. My friends though are more active so I find myself more isolated as can't join them for many activities. I do sometimes wonder why I bother as life doesn't always seem worthwhile, and these thoughts of suicide do creep in.

I am struggling greatly with packing in smoking again and know if I don't then I could be in real trouble, but part of me says stuff it - why am I clinging on to life when everything seems so hopeless anyway. The only reason why I don't give in is because I am too stubborn. I have fought depression for so long now and successfully put off the final act. I find what helps me is to say every morning that today won't be the day I do it. This then leaves me freer to enjoy the day as much as possible, then I make the decision again the next day. x

[Eian59 in reply to hypercat54]

Thanks again for your help I might try that tomorrow. As you know it can really get to you but like you say one day at a time

[hypercat54 in reply to Eian59]

One day at a time is all it takes It's surprising how quickly those days turn into months then years. I am in my 60's now and never thought I would make it even half as far. x

[Hidden in reply to hypercat54]

B

I have given up when it comes down to age, as you know this month is my Birthday

28/08. will be sixty nine and to be honest not so long ago I though my life would have not lasted so long. Next year I will be seventy, I have always thought in the past three score years and ten would be a point not reached, all of a sudden I am there where I am and I feel I might actually reach my seventies, Although this year have proved to be a real problem as far as my health concerns present themselves.

All we can do is look towards next day, looking any further can be depressing when you see your Partners Health begins the early stages of getting old

We all follow the same pathway, age and bad health needs to be accepted, however we need to push on down the roadway and try and live our Lives as best we can

BOBxx

Have you heard from Gemma

[Eian59 in reply to Hidden]

Hi Bob

Thanks for your reply what you say is true it's bad enough getting old without all

the illnesses on top of it.

like you say we have to keep going but right now I am not in a good place but I hope I can shake off soon thanks again.

Eian

[Hidden in reply to Eian59]

Eian

Like you we all go through, a bad place I have two concerns that are not illnesses,

Both my problems cannot be solved in a normal way, one greed the other official

I am unable to move on everything now is out of my hands so diverting negative thoughts to good experiences is the only option I have. Life is like that and sad to say we need to move on because we will not function. We all need to take into consideration the bigger picture and file away any negative thoughts

BOB

[hypercat54 in reply to Hidden]

No not for a while. I hope she is ok.

Not being funny Bob but life is much easier with a partner. I find I am too isolated now and don't have enough company. I know your issues are bad but you are at least getting help with them. I get sweet FA and am left completely on my own to cope as best I can. And I'm not. x

[Hidden in reply to hypercat54]

B

I know you feel isolated, and you do have a need that is not been met, life can be very cruel especially when we feel alone without the needed support and understanding, You can if needed to PM me to talk out how your feelings

At the moment most of my support is from Hazel and GP,

For you it can be difficult to advise, it is very difficult to walk in another shoes. I remember you enjoyed your Darts, I suppose that in some ways is your comfort where you can meet like minded people who follow one of your diversions.

My assistance is one and only, at this time, like you family understanding is negative and destructive. I am feeling so very tired. We can also say bright blue sky always follows a heavy storm. Are there any day centres where you can go, like minded company will generally be sympathetic, they also need understanding, especially if they are given the same in return

BOB

BOB

[hypercat54 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you my friend and I appreciate that. I do recognise the feeling of being tired of it all though so don't think I don't understand. It's a ***** getting old isn't it? Bev xx