since my work injury and car accident injury i am struggling keeping up with life chores, daily task. i suffer from anxiety and depression from it, i dont want to do things, feel lonely and not able to keep up. no i dont stay in bed all day but i sit alot and stare. i have pseduoseizures from all this. than my family gets upset becasue i cant seem to get out of my own way. now my dad has a girlfriend and i dont have a boyfriend support system either. the guy that i like is not wanting to go out or come to my house since there is a spike in numbers in florida. i am not sure what to do at this point with how i feel or how to get my life back on track. i am in counseling but it only helps to a certain point.
ptsd kicking up today and i feel like a failu... - Heal My PTSD
ptsd kicking up today and i feel like a failure due to it
It's understandable, tulip1576, to feel like a failure but you are not a failure.
PTSD is something outside your control and sometimes you need to be kind to yourself when you can't move or do things.
I don't know whether it's done part of trauma response or depression because they can look similar but have different biochemistry and different treatment/ ways of coping.
If it's freeze response then trying to push yourself night not help. You need to wait it out and try some very gentle exercise but only for a short time then rest.
It isn't necessarily thoughts. It could be your body reacting to trauma.
Maybe you could ask your therapist about possible freeze response vs depression.
Having trauma therapy can definitely help but initially it is very tough. Have you asked about available trauma therapy?
It's really important to observe how we feel but without judgement and just be aware of various emotions, body sensations etc. They eventually pass but having to hold it inside takes a lot of energy so it can be really helpful to get through this in therapy so you free up that energy eventually to do everyday things.
Self compassion is very important. I know it's hard when people judge when you can't function and they don't understand. But having self compassion can alleviate the pressure and free up the energy to do things.
Sending support...
PTSD and Lockdown is not a good combination. Many of us are in the same sort of predicament right now,
I'm in UK and Shielding, which means I can't go out because of low immune system and age (72), would leave me very vulnerable to infection, so I'm stuck in until mid August. I have also suffered PTSD, after escaping an extremely abusive marriage 30 years ago, although it is a lot better than it was. I still have the 'Duck and cover' reflex to loud noises, but otherwise I'm OK.
In fact I'm climbing the walls. desperate to get out, something I didn't think I would do, as I am a homebody, but the four walls are closing in! I'm finding I need new sights and sounds.
It's a tough situation if you are stuck in with family. Little irritations soon become big problems, and the fact that your father has a new lady I can see becomes an issue when you can't see your bf, who may be staying away deliberately because he doesn't want to bring any infection to you.
Try to stay strong,
Cheers, Midori
Self-care is important when feeling as you do. I too, have bouts where I suffer as you do. Are you eating healthy every day, our brains need healthy fuel to function properly. Are you sleeping well? Most important what nourishes your inner being? Look for a book called This Is For You: A Creative Toolkit For Better Self Care by Ellen M Baird.
None of us with PTSD are failures, more like Warriors, our negative assumptions are detrimental to our wellbeing, change your focus, what are your strengths? How have you managed to cope with all you have described? We need to be our own best friends.
You don't lie in bed by your own admission, that's a positive. Grab a journal and begin to write down the things you are grateful for, start with one a day this week and two next week.
You are so much more than what has happened to you. Great to hear you have a therapist.
As others have said the world situation is impacting us all - keep posting - we'll hold each other up. We are in this together, tulip1576!
Take care. Life is difficult but I hope you can take care of yourself and know that your healing is important.
Put small tasks on your day and will yourself to do them.
Find an exercise you enjoy. I hope you can move through your day,
Welcome
So sorry to hear of the loneliness and the pain that you have been feeling. I am glad that you have been seeing a counselor. As Natalie mentioned, it may be a wise idea to see a trauma informed counselor. Also, would it be possible for your family to meet with the counselor as well? Perhaps they could give your family a better understanding of what you are going through? It definitely helps to have a support system. Prayers for you.