painful days

[Agara33]

my state of mind has been so isolating. These days I try to look for ways to connect with people or be around people and I just find myself scared, hurt, insulted, offended and confused most of the time. The only time I really have to be in a sort of healthy environment is a pottery class twice a week and found I really just don’t know how to be around people and the whole situation is difficult and quite sad…sometimes I try to connect with a friend from the past and have to wonder what it is that I’m doing or saying that makes me feel like I’m being avoided…and I really need to be around people in order to heal. I’m in s constant state of crisis-and for the most part I don’t think anyone sees or knows but maybe they sense that I need them …maybe they sense the anxiety i feel that I need people to survive….just now I had an interaction that I don’t know how to interpret-someone who says they want to meet up just disappeared-it’s really insulting. I honestly don’t know how to survive without human interaction and care and contact and my need of it is what seams to keep it far away.

[Mamamichl]

I get this agara. I feel this deeply. I’m learning that my interpretations aren’t always right because of my ADHD Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria. Being in DBT has been helpful and regular meditations/mindfulness throughout the day has been helpful as well… not to mention counseling and medications.

If you are medicated, talk to your doc. May be time for an Adjustment.

[Agara33 in reply to Mamamichl]

I don’t think this has something to do with medication, even if it did I just can’t go down that road right now it would be way too confusing

[Dolphin14 Moderator]

Agara

Try not to take it personal when someone says they want to meet up and then have no contact. Sometimes this is seen as the polite thing to say at the moment.

This is seen by us as rejection because we are so sensitive.

I'm not sure what else you have available for social gatherings. I think I would just keep searching.

I'm sorry this is taking a toll on you. We all need some human contact.

Thinking of you

❤️🐬

[Agara33 in reply to Dolphin14]

Thank you, I guess it’s an accumulation ofcthings

[Starrlight]

I get that you need interaction with people to heal. I get that it hurt when the person never got in touch. I recently someone invited me out and said she’d text me that evening and she never did so I let it go. I wonder if I should have tried to get in touch that night, but too late now. I let it go because part of me didn’t want to go. I have social anxiety and I feel awkward a lot of the time even around some that I’m closest to. It’s hard but let us not blame ourselves for having trouble, it’s nothing wrong we’ve done.

[Agara33]

thank you

[Starrlight in reply to Agara33]

If we are open to new opportunities with people the better the chance of good experiences and friends. Try not to let past experience paint the new ones.