I Am So Upset :) :): Had a doctors... - Fibromyalgia Acti...

Fibromyalgia Action UK

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I Am So Upset :) :)


Had a doctors appointment today, (my doctor who i liked), after talking to him about my concerns he has referred me to three different specialists, before i was leaving i asked him if i could leave something with him, he replied"your getting your moneys worth today" which upset me greatly and i burst into tears, i was only asking if he would write me a report to be submitted with my ESA form when he had time and i would pick it up next week, he stated that i only had a ten minute appointment and i was not being fair on him, i had waited in the surgery for 30 minutes past my appointment time, i told him that i had not meant to exceed my time but stated i had'nt been to see him in a while, his parting comment was," sorry i upset you i will be glad to do your report, nice to see you", you can imagine my husbands reaction when he saw the state of me. What do i do now? Should i make a complaint or do i put it down to have him having a bad day, i really did like him and i did think he was sympathetic to my illness. Any advice, xx

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13 Replies

If he's normally a good and sympathetic doctor I'd be inclined to write this one off as him having had a stressful day . Perhaps he'd had previous patients in who'd run over their time slots and he was feeling a bit pushed for time, and because he knows you well he said more than he should ?

That's not to say you don't have every right to be upset though . He did apologise so I think I'd let it go and see what happens next time you see him.

Is it possible to book a double appointment at your surgery ? I know some places do this if you have something complicated you need to discuss, or more than one thing.

Big hug for you.


Rach1977 in reply to Hidden

Funny, we were both writing similar repllies at the same time. My Dr upset me and now I have lost my faith in him.

I have recently caught him out on something ( a request to the PCT) as I kept on and on to the surgery and then called the PCT. Don't think he thought I was going to challenge him. I may have pain, but I am not stupid, ( well not all the time anyway!!!)

Hi, so sorry to hear that. I think Drs are under so much pressure, however that is not an excuse. I think they struggle when dealing with FM patients as they do not have the knowledge and they are only General Practioners at the end of the day!!!

He was bang out of order making those comments, you should have replied when he said about getting your moneys worth, you should have said "too right i help pay your wages"!!!!!!

He did say sorry which sounds like he reflected on what he said and realised quite quickly that he was wrong.

I personally would not make a complaint, give him another chance as he may have been having a bad day( no excuse) but if he carrys on being inappropriate and makes you cry again then definately place a complaint to the Practice Manager.

Don't feel too down hun, atleast he will write the report, so you got your wish, albeit in a hurtful way.


i do agree with rach ,

i think we get a bit hypersensitive ,and when doctors (or anyone ) says somthing just that little bit too far ,or adrupt we can get so upset ,

but like rach said give him another chance and if he upsets you again then make a complaint , xxx

Ditto most of the above - hypersensitivety can be a prob for both patient and doctor, however, I think we have a right to expect certain things from gp's - particularly as the govt proposes to put the future care for all patients into gp's hands.

Fact - I have Fibro Myalgia

Fact - Many Gp's believe this condition does not exist

Fact - my future care is dependent on what my gp believes.

Meanwhile, I sometimes sleep for 14 hours a day, I get stuck on the floor cos I can't get up for the pain and I have a very restricted diet because I can't work and so cannot buy healthy foods.

Fact - I am already penalised by my condition and am about to be further penalised because my gp is simply not interested in FM, preferring to see it as a 'mental' condition for which I am totally responsible.

Where do we go from here?

(in addition, I had one gp say to me that the government were 'clamping down pn people like you' )


Hi Fairy I agree with most above too as he did apologise and said he will do the report i would put it down as a stressful day although i would have reacted as you did.

My gp is supposed to be the one who realises FM exists but despite that i am not allowed to discuss more than 2 things at a time so if i have multiple worries tough. And also i asked over a week ago giving the letter in by hand to the reception to look at my medical notes still not heard so next week i have to chase that up as well as make another appt for meds as she wont put the stronger ones on rpt.

I have lost all my faith in GPs, they can keep us waiting but we cant use a few more mins of their time.

I hope you dont let it upset you no more as that wont help.

Gentle hugs sweet dreams if you get some sleep. x

Hi fairydust,

You do have a right to be upset but like what other people have said it might of just been a bad day.

He did reffer you to different specialist so he must of been intrested in you, so i would leave it for now and see what happens next time.

I hope you feel better about it soon, sending big gentle hugs,

kel xxxx


hi i think i would leave it after all he did realise what he had done and apologised i expect like all of us he had enough today and you jus happene dto be in the firing line if like you say he is normally sympathetic i would just put it down to docs bad day and ay least you made him feel guilty o he will prob do you a really lovely letter love to you diddle x


Hi sorry to hear you had this upsetting experience, most of us would have reacted exactly the same as you and taken it extremely personally,however please don't,it sounds like your Dr was having a bad day and didn't think before he spoke and as soon as he realised the hurt he'd inflicted he quickly turned it around and apologised to you and as Diddle says he will probably sent you a letter and will be feeling pretty guilty about it! Hope you feel brighter soon take care Hugs xxx


Hi All,

Thanks for the advice and after a night thinking about it i think you are all right, we all have our bad days and as he is normally very good i will give him the benefit of the doubt, soft hugs, xx

im so glad you decided to leave it at that ,, my gp said something si,ilar ,, she rang me when i got home to apologise and explained that she was trying to inject humour as i often do when im sat talking to her ,, but as i was so veruy low it fell short on that day ,,, my gp works so very hard and i know she looks exhausted as she only has part time help .. if you have a great gp always give them the benefit of the doubt ,,xxxxxxxx

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