I had a couple of good days last week, but now I feel as bad as ever again. The tight feeling in my chest won't go away I want to cry and feel very sorry for myself. Hubby made a big effort yesterday and took me out for the day, but I was just going through the motions. Doing things I should do rather than wanting to or enjoying them.
Given a choice I would go to bed and stay there, but I have to force myself on. I have responsibiles two elderly parents who need attention every day, a job which I used to love. I now dread going to work and count the hours into I get home. I have a hubby and a house to look after. I am feeling very sorry for myself today, the sadness is taking over and I feel sick with fear and dread.
I love my hubby very much but I do think of leaving him, I think I would be better on my own shut away somewhere. Then I remember when I was on my own and I was still miserable. I am constantly looking for a solution and doubt I will find one. It just want it all to end.