Aaaargh, here we go again:-(

Well my other half's mum has rung him up last night and told him he needs to sort his life out. Now i am sure for all you dealing with anxiety, that does not help. It seems to have knocked him back. I am so bloody frustrated. Spoken to him today and he seems so low again. Seems to be questioning everything AGAIN!.

She spoke to me on the phone the other night saying he needs to get a grip. She does not grasp what it is like for him. She says he is man of the family and should be getting over the death of his friend. That was the final straw for him. Doesnt understand that it isnt just that.

He seems to be putting himself under pressure today.Saying all this isnt fair on me. He is just sooooo tired and just wants to sleep. His Mum is not giving him any let up at all. With her alzheimers you cant talk to her. Felt like ringing her today and saying give him a break. But it wouldnt help and i would be yelled at, then it would make him worse. Again i have told him not going anywhere. He needs space he will get the space.

Dont know what i can do but be there for him. One little thing just knocks him and then everything else seems 100 times worse for him. Is this common that one upset can cause one massive setback.

Frustrated Lou. xxx

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  • Oh Lou,

    It's so hard and I think you're doing wonders fielding all of this. I know for myself it really does feel like I lurch from one crisis to another all precipitated by things other people call normal life. I have some experience of how hard it is for him to deal with the mental and emotional demands his mother's condition will be placing on him too. But it isn't easy for you either. How frustrating for you to have this person causing chaos in your relationship and not to be in a position where you can fight back. You are supporting him to the very best of your ability and being there for him is all you can do. Remember to keep looking after yourself though - it is important you have an outlet for your own frustration and difficulties. You need to stamp your feet and scream some times!!!!

    Hang in there.x

  • Hi Lou, I can hear you screaming over in Halifax!! Oh sweetheart as if you don't have enough to cope with! Just try and block her out of your mind, if that is at all possible. You don't have to worry about her, and you know what you are doing thank God! Yes it's true unfortunately that 1 thing can tip you over the edge. The anxiety at this time of years is almost tangible. All the bad things are magnified 20 fold for people with normal anxiety levels. As you are finding out :( . Lou you can't do anymore love than what you are doing, that much is true! I didn't know your man had lost his friend.... thank the lord he has you as his rock and support. It will get better Lou...honest :)

    Lots of Love and Hugs xxxxxxxxxElla xxxxxxxxxxx

  • HI lou, yes when one thing goes wrong all seems so much worse. if it was me i would have to have a chat with his mother and really stress what hes going through cos it sounds like shes a bit ignorate. people recover at different speeds and loosing someone is sooooo hard. i recently was having a few problems with my partners family/mother and i wrote her a letter to put her in the picture of my situation.........i still dont think she really gets it but i got to say want i needed. some people are so single minded. x

  • Hi guys thanks for that. Sam that really is a great idea. His mum has alzheimers and only hears what she wants to hear. She will lose her rag at the slightest of things. I had it in the neck the other week, being accused of not helping him etc.

    I am off out tonight with my work mates. Feel guilty but i need my time to unwind, step away for a night and get hammered:-). Even now feel like i dont want to go but know it will do me good.

    Hopefully he will have a peaceful weekend where he can try and unwind. Hope you all have a good weekend.

    Love and hugs

    Lou xxxxxx

  • Good lass

    - hope you've had a lovely, fun night out.x

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