Missing my mother

[Newgirl48453]

My mom passed away about a month ago and I'm feeling very overwhelmed. She lived with me for almost 17 years helping to raise my 4 boys and support me through a divorce, going back to school for an accounting degree and working while my kids were young. My mom was basically another mama to my boys. Their father is in a different state with another family. So I lost my best friend, my partner and my mother all in one when she died. I can't open the cards or her death certificate yet. I can't send thank you cards or contacts places like Social Security. I've transferred the utilities to my name but that's it. All of that makes it all too final. I'm feeling very overwhelmed trying to take care of the boys, the house, work and their school because they got so behind with their school work the last 2 months. I just can't seem to get caught up. And still grieving.

[Natsteveo]

Hello sweetheart

My heart sank when I read the first line as I too lost my mum and it’s heartbreaking I’m so sorry for your loss give yourself time it’s only been a month it’s still very raw yet ..leave the death certificates and cards until you’re ready it took so long for me to do any of them I thought if I opened them and then it’s reality that “omg my mum is really gone” I wasn’t ready to accept she was gone I couldn’t handle it.. you have said everything about you’re lovely mum in one sentence she’s you’re mom you’re best friend your partner and to lose that is heart shattering.. you will feel the loss always it does get easier over time but the loss will always be there she’s you’re mum..half of me went when I lost my mum I always say “my mum taught me everything I know...except how to live without her xx just remember she will always be with you and live in your heart for eternity nobody can take that away from you love never dies babes I’m always here if you need a friend

Nat 😘

[Newgirl48453 in reply to Natsteveo]

Nat,

Thank you so much for your beautiful words. I finally feel like we have a good handle on the boys' school work and I have time to respond. You're so right. Our moms are our best teachers and they teach us everything except how to get through this life without them.

Yesterday was her birthday and I got through the day without crying. The boys and I made her a cake and we sang happy birthday to her and blew out her candles last night. It just feels like life is getting in the way and we haven't had a chance to really mourn. But hopefully we can get through this hectic time really come together as a family. I'm handling my anxiety on my own for the most part and that's good. Not in the beginning but it's getting better. Again, thank you for your kind words.

[Hidden]

Hello

I to felt for you so much when reading your post , I lost my Mum some years ago now she was my rock in so many ways and even though you learn to live with it the void it leaves never goes away but what a wonderful Mother you had and I am sure he wishes will be that you follow in her footsteps been such a wonderful Mum and you will but this is going to take time

Give yourself time , there are no rules when you should do things or how long you need to grieve do whatever you feel best

Take each day as it comes , and slowly you will rebuild your life but she will always be a part of it as the memories and love for her will never leave you

Take Care x

[YogaLife]

I lost my mom 2 years ago. She told me she would always be with me and I could talk to her and ask her things and she would guide me to the answer. Sometimes when I see a bird flying around I imagine it is her watching over me. She had Alzheimers for 4-5 years before so I felt like I had already lost her. I actually feel closer to her now that she has passed. Sometimes when I am cooking one her recipes I can feel her like she is standing right next to me. It is an odd but comforting feeling.

My 31 year old daughter has lived with me for 10 years. She is moving 3 hrs away this week. I am already missing her. It is bringing up all those feelings of loss. There are a lot of people missing their mothers every day. Think of us for support. I wish you the best.

[Hidden]

Hi there,

So so sorry for your loss. Give yourself time to grieve. Sounds like your mom was an amazing woman. She may not be physically there anymore, but her spirit is still there. When people pass away, they’re never truly gone. Just their physical bodies are. Your mom is your guardian angel now and she is still there for you, just in a different way.

Take care of yourself 💗