No future: A very scary symptom is i legit... - Anxiety Support

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No future

shrs3 profile image
12 Replies

A very scary symptom is i legit see no future for myself. Im going through all these motions but idk what for. I go to work, and then come home with no real interests. Like pat of this other side of me wants to feel things and be excited And want a boyfriend and want a family. But i just dont see it for me. I cant envision it. Im scared of things changing. Like what if im forced to move or a loved one dies. I just want to sit in my house and everything be the same. But on the inside i do want to snap out of it and live my life. Has anyone gone through this and got better. This is no way to live. I feel dead

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shrs3 profile image
shrs3
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12 Replies

Anxiety and depression are closely related- cbt and anxiety therapists can help, meds too. My faith gets me through everyday.

Rachms11 profile image
Rachms11

U sound like me. I have a boyfriend and I wonder at times whether I can move forward and have kids etc or get married. I like how things are but then I Hate them

shrs3 profile image
shrs3 in reply to Rachms11

Yea itd hard to explain but i huess its just like i feel alone and invisible and everyone else is going to have good futures but im too afraid

Rachms11 profile image
Rachms11 in reply to shrs3

I know what u feel

Ed101 profile image
Ed101

May or may not help you but sometimes you just need someone to encourage you to be stronger and find your own path. I did cognitive behavioral therapy and it definitely helped. Also there are some amazing videos on youtube that will change your thinking. I was exactly the same 2 or so years back. Found these lectures by a psychologist named Jordan Peterson and he made me realize how much time i've wasted feeling like i'm worth nothing and just basically playing some victim(but also a lot more than that..he's so good at convincing you that you have it in you to be great). I"ve come a long way but still need a bit more time to finish my courses, find a job, get a girl and so on..It's a process but the point is to take a small step each time towards some goal so you don't look back thinking you wasted so much time. In your case find what type of future you would like to have and just make each day 1 small step closer to that. I honestly feel like you shouldn't be ever looking for a relationship(because it ends up not working so well). Just work on yourself and it will naturally happen because similar people will always gravitate towards each other.

shrs3 profile image
shrs3 in reply to Ed101

Thank you, this is great advice:)

Ed101 profile image
Ed101 in reply to shrs3

shrs3, I'm glad. :). Take some time and just plan for something you want in your future. Then slowly work towards accomplishing it. Each 6 months to a year, you will notice how far you've come ticking off those boxes of little things you've done that are now much closer to that big goal you wanted.

Agora1 profile image
Agora1

Hi Ed101, I totally agree with your way of thinking regarding working on yourself first. If you don't know who you are, it's pretty hard to know who you should be with. You want to be your own person and not have to depend on another for happiness or worth. It's true that similar people tend to find each other, making a stronger relationship. Keep listening to Jordan Peterson, it sounds like he gave you sound advice. I'm going to look him up on YouTube. Keep staying positive in going forward. You are doing good. :)

Ed101 profile image
Ed101 in reply to Agora1

Agora1, For sure. There's absolutely nothing better than that feeling of being a strong, accomplished individual. It takes time and a hell of an effort(especially if you have multiple issues going on) but it's so worth it. A lot of us with anxiety tend to focus on what others are thinking or saying and not what we should do to make ourselves stronger. One of the great lessons i learned through him was that in therapy, it's not that they teach you that the world is not a scary place(because it's not true, the world can be a very scary place), but more that if you accept the fact suffering is part of pretty much everyone's life(in different ways of course), you become a more courageous person to the point where life becomes that much more bearable. It's sort of why so many of us love to watch movies about heroes. By lifting yourself up and getting stronger, you also have a chance to be that hero and help our society in different ways..otherwise we watch our life go to waste and see nothing good for the future.

Agora1 profile image
Agora1

Wow Ed101, you are wise beyond your years and it will take you far. I have been watching Jordan Peterson's videos and I will say they are powerfully informative. I plan to watch several more of his videos. Each time we do, we learn something knew about ourselves and life.

Have a great day Ed101 :)

Ed101 profile image
Ed101 in reply to Agora1

Thanks! Jordan has a ton of videos and i can't even catch up to all of them because of my courses but i'll get back to it when i get more free time. At first i thought he was some motivational speaker(which a lot of times is just encouragement without explanations that make sense..it's stuff you believe for a short time and all). When i started watching some of the videos on why we suffer for example, it really made a lot of sense. He said something like.."Well look at you and how you are built, there is so little of you and so much of everything else"(sort of like us being a tiny spec of dust in this huge universe).."so you are vulnerable across multiple domains". Then he went on to explain how you decrease that suffering. Well, you bear your burden in society and live in a way where you always try to tell the truth and not be that manipulative type(because if you live that kind of life you're corrupting your society..and if enough people become corrupted..well you end up in a world in which there's so much chaos). Anyways, it's good stuff. You have a great day too. :)

Coot18 profile image
Coot18 in reply to Ed101

God gives us the fragile as an opportunity to exhibit our compassion.

If we are fragile ourselves, we can still practice compassion for another.

When we extend that compassion, it reduces our own fragility.

There is always someone worse off.

As my 68 year old body stumbles up the aisle in WalMart, I whine about my back and leg pain. God sends someone up the aisle past me in a wheelchair.

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