Lets have a little back story.....I've struggled with anxiety for I'd say the most part of my life, although I was only given a firm diagnosis a few years ago. I also suffer with fairly frequent panic attacks (yeah, I'm a pretty lucky gal). I've gone through many different treatment plans, whether it be medication or psychotherapy of different models. So far, it's hard to see any improvement.
What is SO frustrating is that I feel like my brain is of two minds; the one side is screaming at me that I'm about to die at any second, that I'm not breathing properly, that my heart is going to give out. And the other, a much quieter voice, is telling me that I've been through this before, that it's just me overthinking, and that I'm going to be OK. It's all a bit overwhelming to say the least.
So you can imagine, whenever I am sick, or have the slightest discomfort my poor little brain goes into overdrive and I begin to rationalise that I must have cancer, that I must have porphyria, that I must have sepsis, or be having a heart attack. And as these thoughts become louder and louder, it feeds into the anxiety and panic, and then the physiological symptoms get worse and worse. (shaking, short breaths, hyperventilating, sweating, feeling faint, heart pounding)
My only worry is; what if one day I am genuinely sick but I pass it off as an anxiety/panic related episode? How do I go about seeking help when it is actually needed?
But it's this thought that makes me even more anxious. (Yeah, I'm not a great person to be friends with either, although I'll definitely make your life seem a hell of a lot better...silver linings)
I've found the only peace from it all is when I'm distracted - idk if that'll help any of you in the same boat as me? But when I'm really engaged in something else, my thoughts are not on my imminent death for once