Will it ever end?

[anxiouslady13]

So I have panic disorder, and tonight it is in full force. Usually I can deal with it pretty well but not tonight. For about 6 months I haven't had much symptoms, only a few hot flashes, so I guess I "forgot" about it. Tonight I'm sure I'm going to have a heart attack maybe a stroke or maybe just pass out. Ugh..... My heart feels like its racing but its not (I'm checking my pulse), my stomach is aching and doesn't feel right and of course my mind is going a million miles an hour with "what if's". I have had mri's and full blood work and any other test to make sure I'm healthy and NOT going to die. Is there an end in sight? Probably not. Maybe I just need to hear its going to be ok.

[Will_00]

You're going to be fine. Anxiety gets the best of us. I've felt like you plenty of times then it turns out to be nothing.

[waqasvic]

It does have an end the thing is . Let it happen . It will pass eventually . Its perfectly normal . Drink lots of water when this happens and try to walk around the house or outside to calm this down .

[Jazzylove]

I've felt like you a million times I can go months with no symptoms and then BAMM anxiety comes out of nowhere and I feel like I'm gonna die. When I have hard days/nights like that I do my best to take it easy take a nice hot shower play some music and drink some chamomile tea whatever you can to relax yourself. I know it's easier said than done but believe me doing what ever you can to relax and take your mind off the thought of "OMG I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA DIE" or "SOMETHING IS REALLY WRONG WITH ME" well help you train yourself to beat those damn anxiety/panic attacks

[Sfqueen]

I know how you feel had one this weekend went to the ER ekg done and I was send home with an Ativan. So frustrating but you will be ok

[Cicinoodle]

IT'S GOING TO BE OK.!!!!!!!!

try to identify what is causing your panic, CLOSE YOUR EYES...BREATH DEEPLY IN AND OUT VERY SLOWLY AND REST YOUR EYES for a bit

go to a happy place, even if it was when you were little... just let go and know you are just fine. We are all in this together xo

[KeysToLife777]

Hello anxiouslady13. First things first, you are absolutely going to survive this. This disorder will constantly call your bluff. It comes on strong and wants to see if you'll give in to it. Think of it as your own little private goblin. But the one thing you have to remember is that monsters and goblins are make believe. Like a creature from a scary movie, they have weaknesses,you just have to figure out what that is. I used to put my goblin to sleep with Klonopin. Worked really well but only until I decided to quit the medicine. Then he was back stronger than ever. So that's where I'm at now, trying to recover from years of Benzo use after never trying to work on behavioral techniques. I too feel like I'll never make it to the next day. In fact, I feel that way right now. But we have to remember that not everyday is like this, or at least, not as bad, and we have to keep working on the things we need to do to control these symptoms. For me, excersise has helped. My doctor is also trying lithium for what he thinks may be termed as bipolar disorder. You need your own doctor to determine the use of meds though. Remember, the world around you is the same as it ever was, it's just your personal goblin trying to cast an illusion on it for only you to see. You can win this!

[Justdarlie in reply to KeysToLife777]

I have been on benzodiazepams for 30 years and want to wean off. I know it can be hellish but they are not working well for me now and have lost their effectiveness. Can you share your experience with weaning them, how long you were on, what meds you take etc?. It would be helpful for !e. Thanks much

Darla

[KeysToLife777 in reply to Justdarlie]

You're probably going to find this hard to believe, but it took me a full year to withdrawal from klonopin. I'm in my 50's and had been taking them since the mid 80's. I never had any problems with klonopin myself, I used them as prescribed and never wavered. My doctor just decided one day that I needed to start tapering off of it. Warning! You have to do this slowly, little tiny bits at a time. I would cut my pills up into quarters and cut 1 quarter of a tablet off for weeks. I did this because I knew it would be hard and I wasn't taking any chances. You would be better off to have someone to support you and your effort. This makes it much easier to deal with. Imagine if you had the flu and you're all by yourself. It's much better to have someone to help out when you're really really sick. One thing I learned about myself was that I am a much nicer person than I was when I was on klonopin. Don't get me wrong, life was much easier (at least I thought so) when I was on klonopin. But my life was so irresponsible and my relationships were a mess. I really didn't care if anyone liked me or not, or if I was mean to someone. That has all changed now. Like I said, it's much harder work going day to day now, but it's gradually getting better. For the record, I'm everything but a perfect model. I hit walls daily as if I were one of those toy robots you see on a kids tv show. I may be bouncing off things for the rest of my life but it makes me feel good to be able to say I'm free of those meds. My advice, keep good company and spread love around, things will get better.

[Justdarlie in reply to KeysToLife777]

Thank you so much? Did you wean yourself off with your doctors help? Did you use any meds to help reduce withdrawal symptoms such as valium or gabapentin? Do you still suffer panic or anxiety? Do you take antidepressants still? Sorry for so many personal questions but your experience is invaluable.

[KeysToLife777 in reply to Justdarlie]

Yes, my doctor monitored my every move. See.....I had been on other meds along with the klonopin. One was depakote and the other was lamictal. I am still on those meds to help with a bipolar issue. I want to stop those someday soon but I'm taking everything slowly. My doctor did say that those meds possibly made it easier to get off klonopin. I don't take benzos anymore. As far as still suffering from panic and anxiety, I do still have my moments, but that's just part of the day to day struggles that we have to go through. I don't know if things will ever be as easy as they used to be. But I'm ok with that. I seem to be doing well enough to enjoy the life I was given. I get to thinking about it sometimes and I think "man....I could never have done some of the things I did in my life had I not taken klonopin. I used to be a musician in a very famous band that I won't mention here, but I think back about being on stage and how nothing bothered me. No stage fright, nothing. But......I missed out on a lot by being so submerged in all the dark things that come with using drugs. (And believe it or not, I only used klonopin as prescribed, no hard drugs). You can find yourself in very compromising positions when your on something. It doesn't have to be heroin or cocaine or even pot, it can be as simple as a Xanax or klonopin. It all alters your thinking and judgement no matter how severe. If you can, and I know it's really really hard, try to taper off(with your doctors help). I think you'll be happier in the long run.

PS: remember, you'll have setbacks, but just reset and try again.

[Justdarlie in reply to KeysToLife777]

Thank you for taking the time to answer. Once they find an antidepressant that works for me and my life stabilizes a bit ( MAJOR life stressors right now), my plan is getting off the benzodiazepams. I am hopeful all will work out for you. I totally get the part about feeling you're missing out on life. Anxiety has held me back on living the life I wanted.

[Randilynn]

The panic and anxiety your feeling will end ... It's going to be ok and everything you feel is only anxiety and panic .. there is nothing wrong with you. Your not dying and your not going to feel like that forever. Try a shower, lavender essential oils help, chamomile tea helps too. We're all here when you need us

[Hardluck]

Keep breathing, and if needs be take a benzodiazepine.

[Justdarlie]

I'm 56. I started with Panic and depression when I was 27. I was put on benzodiazepams and antidepressants for 29 years. Since age 49, I have taken at least one 0.25mg of Xanax a day the about a year ago, the Xanax just stopped working so, things have been helleish off and on since then. When I was 28 I was told I also has Generalized Anxiety Disorder, which seems to me a constant haunting of vague doom. Up until last year, I seemed to do ok, ( taking meds daily). I had 30 years of " ok" and a few months!EMTs of " really good". Cognitive Behavioral therapy really helps but, for me, meds were also necessary. There is a genetic basis for these conditions so, have some self classroom and self love. The best method I've learned is just to recognize it for what it is, chaotic brain chemicals. Know that it won't kill you, deep breathing from the abdomen once every 5 breaths ( counting will help take your focus off the panic), progressive muscle relaxation and having a solid support system of family or friends. For me, it has never gone away however, I have had years where it was under control. God bless you

Darlie

[JKCnWv]

Praying that it'll soon pass, and I'm hoping it's now in the past! I can certainly relate to how horrible this type of thing feels, and mine always bring memories of my daughter and the fact she no longer wants anything to do with me. But, you may want to go to the hospital, if it continues for much longer, or gets any worse. Please know that things will get better, and I'll continue to pray for you and healing! I think this time of the year can bring them on more frequently. God bless you!

[annaj2249]

Same I'm always thinking and acting like it I'm sick off being scared and anxious 😩 the struggle is real

[kama24]

I truly feel for you and understand because I am in much the same situation right now.....it has been a rough year, but the overwhelming fear and panic has got me in it's clutches the past 2 wks. I am on meds that don't seem to help...if anything an Ativan when REALLLY out of control sometimes helps. I put the radio on and try to listen to it. I shake like a leaf, feel off balance, weak, dizzy.......yet the logical part of me that still is there somewhere, says...you've been like this for over a year, you are still here.....you have to get through this and tomorrow is another day....I get hot sweats, then the chills....the old saying "you have nothing to fear but fear itself" is so very true. Would you find keeping a journal ea day helpful. Panic attacks can cause palpitations and they can add to the fear. Do you have someone you can call who would talk to? I can "what if" people under the carpet....I always have one.....we need to try to find a way to calm....no matter what.....take care.

[anxiouslady13]

I truly appreciate each and everyone one of you all! Reading what you have to say calms me down. I apologize for taking so long to respond. I obviously didn't die and even enjoyed the holidays. I am so thankful to be apart of a group that I can confide in without being judged. Bless you all!

[annaj2249 in reply to anxiouslady13]

Same and thank you I'm also still alive even though I've had myself dead weeks ago nightmare !