Hi everyone! Been a while since I posted but I feel I need some support from people other than my parents. I don't have any friends as my anxiety has gotten in the way of making new ones and my old friends ditched me long before I was diagnosed. Today has been a really difficult one. My boyfriend and I had a very honest conversation. He's not sure what he wants anymore and we've just decided to take a break for a week or 2. I'm petrified that its over! I've been in a relationship with him for nearly 6 years and today I just feel empty. My struggles with anxiety haven't been easy on him and he's put up with it for so long now I think it's finally made him reach his breaking point. He's the only person I can rely on to help me through my anxiety as he has been amazing to me throughout my struggle. However, its sadly taken a toll on him and now i'm frightened I'm not going to be able to cope without him. I love him more than words can ever describe and now we're on a break, although its not the end of our relationship as such - yet, I feel empty. I don't want to live my life without him, for me there is no one else. I never knew I could feel pain this bad and that losing him was ever going to happen. For me, he is my soulmate and the reason that I wake up everyday. I just hope that if you have a relationship with someone like that, make sure you tell them everyday how much you love them and don't let your anxiety get the better of that relationship. I've been doing really well the past couple of weeks since we had our first discussion about our relationship but unfortunately I couldn't salvage it and it became apparent that i'd left it too long to get better. Please, whatever you do, don't let it defeat you. Now i'm realising what i've lost and that I took him for granted. As far as I can see, my life is over.
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