My anxiety has torn my relationship apart

I could really use some advice on this. Me and my boyfriend have been together nearly 2 years and he is finding it very hard to put up with my anxiety and constant low mood. I worry about him so much and I always find myself needing his attention. If he doesn't text back or phone then I start to have an anxiety attack. Which is pathetic and not being a good girlfriend. He has been so supportive. But I think he is at the end of the line. He suggested a break until I get my mental health on track, but I feel like that would completely break me. On the other hand I can understand and maybe it would be for the best. We do care for each other a lot, I am just struggling to deal with a lot of things. And I am not sure to agree to this break in the relationship.

7 Replies

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  • Hi Amy,

    Have you try seeking help for your anxiety? do you talk a lot with him regarding your issues? I feel the same way with my partner, I try not to be in a low mood constantly and try to spend some time during the day just talking to her, no worries or negative thoughts.

  • Hi!

    Yeah, I actually am going back to the doctors to try get some more advice. And yes we do talk a lot about these issues. But I always end up getting overwhelmed when doing so. Your advice about just talking without all the stress is a good idea. Really appreciate that!

  • I constantly fear my anxiety is damaging my relationship. I am glad my partner is very supportive since we met (almost 7 years). I try very hard not to be negative and try to spoil her at least twice a week or more often if anxiety doesn't kick in.

  • Hi Amy

    This is a tough one

    I no when we are suffering with anxiety , it can also be hard for your loved ones including your OH

    Relationships at the best of times can be difficult

    He seems very supportive of you in the past & sounds like he really does love you but maybe finding it hard to cope & needs to just have a breather

    Saying that I no it doesnt help you any

    Its a tough one really , as without him it sounds like your anxiety may get worse & yet at the moment you are both struggling

    No one can tell you which would be the best way to go with this , only you can make that choice

    Would it be possible maybe rather than say you are on a break that to maybe see him twice a week , that way it gives you both more breathing space for now , you will look forward to seeing each other & when you are together it could be quality time

    When we are suffering from anxiety it can make us feel we are not worth been loved , then this can turn into needing to be reassured all the time , which no one other than ourselves can reassure us , so this doesnt make you a bad GF it is part of what you are suffering from

    I really hope you can resolve this in a way that will be best for both of you

    Remember you are worth been loved & deserve to be

    We will support you as much as we can , keep talking on here

    Love

    whywhy

    xxx

  • Thank so much for that advice. Maybe just spending less time would be a good idea rather than cutting all connection off. I definitely am going to seek more advice from a doctor as I think that might be best for both of us.

    Thank you so much for your explanations and wonderful advice. You have no idea how much I appreciate it

    xx

  • Amy your welcome

    I think its a great idea to get help as you have suggested , just not to save the relationship , but for you & your future

    On the days you dont see him , come on here , well come on here when ever you need to , but most important when you are feeling down & insecure & let us try & help

    Do let us no how things go

    xxx

  • Hi Amy r u on any medication for ur anxiety? As I was always in a low mood with mine untill I went on anti depressants but I know alot of people do deal with it them selfs. They have very much helped me to help me get a grip on my anxiety. My doctor put me on mine for a short time but I don't feel ready to come off them just yet. Xx

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