New here and desperate for help please

Hi everyone,

I'm due to go on holiday this Friday for 2 weeks with my boyfriend. We're staying in the UK and I've been to this place before and absolutely loved it. I've been really looking forward to it until the last couple of days. For no apparent reason my anxiety has gone through the roof and now I'm completely petrified of going. 

I'm currently on 40mg of Fluoxetine daily and up until now, they've worked perfectly. I'm worried I may not be able to go and my boyfriend will be really upset with me. I don't know what to do. Can anyone please help x 

8 Replies

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  • Hello 

    I live in the UK and we are a very friendly bunch of people you will have a lovely time :-)

    And I have been looking at the weather forecast and I think you may be lucky and we will be having some decent weather rather than the usual rain we have :-D

    This is your anxiety talking telling you that you cannot do this it happens to most of us with anxiety yet once we get on that plane or whatever it is we are doing we are fine , it tests us out to see if it can stop us having a good time , once we let it know we are not listening it disappears !

    What exactly is worrying you the most about this trip just the thought that you cannot do it ? 

    Try not to think of the full picture but just take each part of this as it comes , from packing your case , to travelling to the airport , to getting on the plane etc but just deal with each one when you have to telling yourself you only have to deal with one part of this at a time and if things get really bad you are in control and can change your mind , if we feel more in control it usually helps :-)

    Have you spoken to your BF about how you feel 

    I really would because I am sure he would not be upset but would love to support you :-)

    You can keep coming on here as well talking to everyone there will always be someone about to listen which even if in a small way really does help :-)

    I hope you make it over and have a lovely time :-)

    Take Care x

  • Hi Bounce

    Thank you so much for taking the time to reply. I don't think I worded my message very well, I actually live in the UK too, I'm a Londoner! We're travelling on the train to Great Yarmouth for 2 weeks. We love it there and have been lots of times.

    I honestly don't know why I feel so anxious this time, I have been fine every other time we have been and have been looking forward to going back for months but now all of a sudden, I feel like I'd rather do anything but go. It just started a few days ago and now I'm in complete meltdown. Crying all day, waking up shaking, legs trembling, can't think of anything other than how awful I feel.

    My main fear is that I won't be blue to do it and I will have to tell my boyfriend I can't go and see how disappointed and I suspect, angry he'd be. He knows all about my anxiety and has gotten me through it brilliantly but I know he's desperate to get away so I'm really worried of spoiling it for him.

    I just keep thinking that I'm either not going to be able to go or I'm going to force myself to go and be miserable and anxious the whole time and spoil it anyway. I really don't know what to do x 

  • Hello again :-)

    Yes a slight bit of confusion there so you are already in the uk :-D

    Lovely place you are going to visit as you know as you have been before -)

    This really is your anxiety trying to get in the way , all the "what if's " and did you notice all negative ones !

    It could go that you have a fantastic time and you come back wishing you could have stayed longer !

    But anxiety never want;s to tell us positives or it would never win !

    Again I would take each step as it comes , live in today , forget about the holiday as such for now that is a few days away yet and we only have today to think about and what we need to do 

    Tell your BF about all these fears I am sure if he knows you can sit and talk it through maybe come up with a plan together :-)

    You could go and see your Doctor and maybe see if they will offer you a few diazapam if you feel you need something just to take the edge of just to help you do this , sometimes they will prescribe just a few in certain circumstances 

    Let us know how you get on :-) x

  • Paroxetone is better for anxiety attacks. Perhaps increase by 10mg.

  • Thank you for your replies.

    Unfortunately I can't up my dosage by 10mg as I only have 20mg capsules. So it's either stick at 40mg or jump to 60mg of Fluoxetine and I'm worried if I do that, it might make me feel worse before it makes me feel better, and I really don't need to feel worse than I already do! 

    I do actually have some Diazepam, I have 7 tablets of 2mg but I'm not sure how 7 tablets will get me through 2 weeks. Plus I'm pretty sure you're not allowed to take too many of them. I know you're totally right Bounce, my anxiety wants to get in the way and I am just feeding it but I don't know how to stop. I can't seem to stop thinking about all of the bad things that COULD happen rather than the good things that will likely happen. 

    My BF does try his best to help but he just doesn't understand, to him it's like, it's a holiday... Not a prison sentence, what's wrong with ya! As I say, he really does try his best with me but he loses patience. I don't really blame him to be honest. Last thing he said to me about it is "Are you going to freak out the morning we go?" Which is exactly what I'm scared of! Ugh. Why can't I just be normal!

  • Hi Beedoo, I'm feeling the same. Because I have been unwell/stressed out my brother has booked me train tickets to go & visit him and my sister in law in Lincoln a week on Thursday for a few days, and I'm terrified that this anxiety will be over the top and I will freak out .

  • Hi Alice,

    I'm sorry that you're feeling bad. I really do empathise with you because if you're feeling half as bad as I am right now then really, my heart goes out to you.

    The one thing I would say to you though is look at the positive, you're going to be with family. Luckily you're not going to be in an unfamiliar surrounding with unfamiliar people. Not that I'm dumbing down your anxiety at all, I'm just trying to give you a little bit of light at the end of that tunnel.

    I feel abit better now than I did earlier but it comes and goes, I know I'll wake up shaky in the morning and the whole process will start again. I'm just praying I pull myself together by Friday.

  • Thanks for that Beedoo, it's just that I feel my own home is my comfort zone and I'm scared to venture to far. Hope u are well and enjoy ur trip too x

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