My therapist wants me to journal when my panic attacks start so we can identify a trigger. She says there has to be one for me to panic but.. I'm always in a panic? Sometimes it heightens, when the anxiety starts to make me feel really depersonalized and sick, or when I am stressed over any small thing. I don't think there's any one specific trigger. The anxiety is non-stop but therapists don't seem to understand that. Every time I go in she asks how many panic attacks I had over the past week and it's like "Um one?? But it lasted all week??" The only trigger seems to be the anxiety itself and the awful physical symptoms that come with it. But I never stop panicking. Been on tons of meds, the only one that's ever helped in Xanax but now my therapist tells me I'm addicted to it. She says I should be able to calm down without it. As if every time I go to the psychiatrist they don't just prescribe me more. I'm so frustrated right now lol. When I explained my derealisation to her she said she'd never heard of anything like that! Which doesn't exactly put my mind at rest lol. I'm honestly sick of therapists and psychiatrists... I feel like they don't listen, they just do what they know how to do by the book and I'm not a "by the book" case..
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