Depersonalization is mean

I really dislike DP. It is the only symptom I have that has not gone or shifted to something else. I constantly feel as if I could just mentally snap, like I am in my own version of Its a Wonderful Life, watching my life from a different perspective, while feeling as if I'm not taking part in it. I have very little sense of self and though it wasn't as bad a month ago, flared slightly after a very stressful time that was entirely my fault.

Anyone else feel almost scared of themselves? My memory also sucks. But again, I'm not really concerned about that, as I'm reminding myself I don't need to be concerned about any of it. But I am irritated. I'm mad at DP but no longer spend hours researching and worrying over it. But I'm also not getting out much, so my theory is it will be resolved once I really start getting out there more.

I just don't like feeling as if I have to keep myself together in public or I'll start running around screaming. That's kinda how it feels a bit, but I've never done that, not counting the time when I was a kid. Because kids scream. And they seem especially fond to do so in public places.

(I was 2.)

Oh, and who gets it when you have a fear and you fear it happening in public, and you can see it very clearly? I think that's that impending doom feeling, and it is kind of a drag.

I would like to have a one on one discussion with my brain and tell it to chill out. To just put a cork in it and relax.

6 Replies

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  • I have felt like this so many times. It happens to me when all of my other physical symptoms are quiet. Its like my mind can't stand to just relax! I feel like I could lose touch with reality at any second when it happens, but of course, I never do- that's the anxiety trick. If I just tell myself its anxiety and let it happen it passes so much quicker.

  • Yeah,my hats true. Mine has just been present since July, when I started worrying over it.

  • I told my doc this, this very thing!

    She said it was very rooted depression. What we need is a therapist and if you are willing a med to help you out.

  • I'm not taking meds. The feeling isn't awful, it's just irritating.

  • It'll pass. Nothing lasts forever. Just remind yourself it's just a defense mechanism and you don't need to fear it at all. It will go. Xx

  • Lol I LOVE YOUR POST!! lol I love how you put a sense of humor with it. I think all of us that are dealing with this annoying ass disorder really needed to read this... Lol and DP IS mean, a total ASSHOLE to say the least!

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