Not sure how this will work out. I have pretty severe social anxiety but at the same time get very frustrated just being in the house all of the time, so I've accepted an offer to go for drinks with 2 quite good friends and a bigger circle of acquaintances. Absolutely terrified & very nervous but haven't pulled out yet and my friend is on her way to my house so looks like I am stuck with my decision.
Anyone else agree to do these things and just immediately regret it? I'm 18 so stereotypically should love this kind of thing but it's just not for me. Shame all of my friends love it!
Clare
Written by
cld6
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7 Replies
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Hi
Yes I think we all agree to do things & then regret it but once you are there you will possibly enjoy it , we can get more anxious by building the anxiety up in our minds than what we feel once we are there
If you feel uncomfortable at any time make your excuses & leave remember you have that choice , that always helps me when I remember I am in control
Hope you have a lovely time & come back & let us know
Love
whywhy
xxx
Hi
I think you are being positive so just try and relax and go for it, I'm sure your friend will help keep you calm.
Well the good news is I survived a few hours and am now back home. It was okay whilst we were just sitting in a cocktail bar but then eventually it progressed to going to a more club type of bar and I was extremely anxious, but couldn't leave as I'd arranged a lift with my friend so I knew I was stuck for the next half an hour. I was really uncomfortable and just really felt the need to escape but because I couldn't do anything about it I just had to stick it out. Kind of taken a knock to my confidence because I did think I was doing something positive but now it's just put me in a negative place alas, at least I ventured out of the house and saw some friends
Thank you so much for your replies - I read them whilst on my way to the bar and they definitely helped me to feel supported, really appreciate it
That was a big achievement & don't feel down because your confidence got knocked as most would have felt the same that suffer with anxiety , I couldn't have even made it out like you did !
I think when we feel we are not in control we can panic more , so next time you arrange to go out maybe you could find a way that if you want to leave early you have some transport of some kind that way you wont feel trapped
It is a positive you went & you did very well , we are our own worse critics but believe me you should feel proud
Well done for going out in the first place this was a big step and not easy when you have anxiety. Your friends going to a louder busy bar/ club was probably a step too far, so don't be hard on yourself. I try to stick to quieter bars when going out with friends but sometimes it doesn't work out that way. You should be proud of yourself for managing to go.
Yeah, I definitely just need to begin to accept that certain things aren't for me - I feel like I can say that to my heart's content but it's just trying to genuinely convince myself that is the issue! Thanks for your kind words
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