At Trails End.

[shadow45]

I had to get help this morning... Went to the emergency at local hospital with hypertension.... My heart was beating out of my chest...Spoke to a psychiatric nurse about my state of mind and have put myself on a volunteer admissions list for the psych ward. Doing this was the very last thing I wanted to admit... I called a crisis line this morning and they wanted to send an ambulance around to fetch me I just can't have the whole town knowing I am off my rocker and begged them not to..I had to promise to go to the hospital... which I did... I feel now that if I don't get some help things could spiral into a state of complete shutdown. Looked at an apartment in a house just after the hospital visit ...but was in no fit state to say yes or no... I told the agent that I had to suspend looking for a few days because of my health.... I just don't care about my house selling now... My agent has been a lazy ass and I told him so... and to pull his thumb out and take care of the things he is getting paid very well to do. I think this guy was a mistake..But he has two more weeks ..hopefully this new offer will not fall through... If the house sells this time I have to vacate by April 11th.....But as I say I am coming to the realization that I am trying to spin to many plates... Time to shut it down and look after myself... GB you all my dear friends much love and hope for us all...xo steve.

[Hidden]

Oh Steve,feel so much for you,can't you phone your brother or a friend just this once,they would hate to know you are suffering.And another thing no one in your town would even think you are " off your rocker"

Things have just got too much for you at the moment,please just try to reach out for a bit of support,wish I could help you more.You will get better,a good friend of mine paid us a short visit today and he has his life on track after years of mental torment,he has had his medication spot on and he he is now having a really good life now.

Thinking about you and take care,we are waiting to hear how you get on with your house.

[shadow45 in reply to Hidden]

Could be time for the Meds now Lindalou. I`v put it off for years.. Yes I`ll post with news of the house..Much love steve

[Hidden]

Thinking of you Steve ,your going through a terrible time right now,but you've done the right thing by getting help

Agree with lindalou about phoning someone and also that no one will think badly of you,your ill.

Keep posting when you can so we can keep up to date with how things are going xxx

[shadow45 in reply to Hidden]

Will do.... In a spot of calm right now... I guess I`m exhausted from all the drama this morning. Seeing my GP at 4... Much Love steve

[Hidden]

Evening Steve

First on all you are not off your rocker you are ill okay.

Am glad you sort out help today and you have done the best thing possible, you need a rest from all this stress and you will be safe in hospital and looked after. This is what you need right now.

Forget the house and everything else that will all be there later when you are well and fit to sort it.

Sending you good wishes and look forward to seeing you back on here when you are ready.

Bye for now gardener x

[shadow45 in reply to Hidden]

[Hidden]

HI Steve x Well done on going to get help, its often the hardest step in the world to admit you need help and support and you have done this so really well done x Your not off your rocker far from it, you are sane enough to know that you simply cannot carry on with a brave face when underneath you are crumbling. Its time to take care of you and put the rest on hold until you are strong enough to face it once more. Sending you some big hugs xxx I hope from ow on life takes a turn for the better xx Donver x x

[Hidden]

Hi Steve

Internet has eaten my reply I just typed.

So I'm posting again. You are very brave and not off your rocker. You need a rest away from the stress you have been experiencing. With the right meds and a wee break you feel on a even keel again. Sending you lots if love and blessings xxxx

[Yummimummi]

Hey Steve

Well done you, you are on the path for recovery

You have gone and got help which is a huge step forward, so well done

Sending huge positive hugs from across the pond (((((( hugs ))))))

Xxx

[Hidden]

hi steve, I think you are a very brave man, to go through this awful time on your own must have been so hard to bear,we all want you to get the best medical help, you deserve the best, I know you will come through this a much stronger man, will be looking forward to your posts when you are on your path to recovery. lots of love jasper. xx

[Hidden]

Hi Kiddo

After last nights post it is such a relief to read that you have taken these steps today & you should feel proud , it takes a bigger person to ask for help than those that point the finger !

I cant add more as you have had some great replies , but wanted to let you know I am thinking about you

Love

whywhy

xxx

[Hidden]

Hi Steve,

I am glad you have sought help. You have so...much going on in your life it gets overwhelming. One step at a time. Get your health back and hopefully everything else will fall into place.

Sending you good vibes and a big hug.

Eunice xx

[tndrheart2009]

Don't give up there are answers. I've been to the ER with blood pressure spikes and heart racing. When one thing doesn't work seek another. This maybe the start of answers. Don't worry about what others think. It's about what you need. Hugs.

[Hidden]

Take care of yourself first an don't worry about what people think it will all work out. To me you are an overcomer just by what your doing bless you. XXXX Mimi