Bad Day

[PrinkPrincess]

I had a bad day today. Days like this I try to reach out and if I get even a minor rejection my brain turns it into no one likes me and I’m a waste of space. I hate living like this…thinking like this. It feels like torture like someone else is pulling the strings and I’m made to suffer through it. But it’s me. It’s my mind telling me these things and thinking myself into an anxious episode. I hate that I’m this sick person and I feel like a burden to everyone. I hate that I need so much help and reassurance. I hate myself sometimes. I’m trying my best and I’m getting out of my apartment to get away from thinking like this alone. These are the times that I wise I could have a drink….good thing I’m medicated and can’t drink. I just wish I could be numb and not able to feel such sadness and disappointment. I wish I could be less emotionally through all this. I wish I was better

[TailWags]

I have been there. There now.

[Cheetahone]

I hear you PrinkPrincess,

I know what you mean. I sometimes hate the anxiety and depression that I suffer from. Let me say that your health problems don’t make you someone who should be hated, You (and I) deserve kindness, respect and love. We are not our conditions. You can hate that a person has cancer but you love, care and are compassionate with the actual person. Try seeing yourself from the outside and feel the love you would show someone else with the same thing. Mental health is not as accepted as physical health but it is just as important.

Please try to give yourself a well deserved rest, break and time off from ruminating and treat yourself to some good things that you deserve and like, several times a day. Even if it’s a short walk to clear your mind and relax and get away from your head (lol what an strange phrase ).

Also, please don’t feel rejected if you don’t get many or even any replies to your posts. The posts get pushed down and can quickly or easily be missed by most users. This site doesn’t allow for a search feature to look up fellow acquaintances.

I hope this helps and eases your mind (and isn’t too long). I would love to hear what you think of this post or any other thoughts and feelings you have.

Take care (and you don’t have to reply).

[PrinkPrincess in reply to Cheetahone]

Thank you for your response. It puts things into perspective and did ease my mind.

[Hidden]

you sound like me. A few sharp words from my husband or daughters and I feel so stupid. I don’t like mean words. I had enough of it growing up. I also think about a quick shot of whiskey but I am on meds too. Sometimes a good cry works. I came on here to vent and I saw your post. Sounded very familiar. I am still not sure if I want to scream or cry. I have poor health and can’t do alot of things which makes me feel like a burden. So vent anytime here, I care. Sending you a hug 🫂

[PrinkPrincess in reply to Hidden]

Thank you! I’ve been venting more on here and it’s very helpful. Sending you a hug too 🫂 Hope you get through what’s going on with you too

[Shnookie]

Please don’t beat yourself up. We all have lousy days. Perhaps try self care things like listening to music you enjoy. Please don’t feel like you are a burden to others. The fact that you came on Hu is a brave thing to do. I work 7 days a week. I could not do this without a lot of support to get me thru it. I ‘m in the U.S. I use HU, NAMI, CA Peer run Warm Line, Golden Talk and my health insurance mental health hot line. I also have a social worker, shrink and psychiatric case worker. And even with all this, I’m having a physically challenging day at work. New Years Eve would have been my late father’s birthday and January 6th is the 9th anniversary of my beloved mommy’s death from pancreatic cancer. I was her sole caregiver. My stomach has been totally upset for the last 2 days. At times like this, I remember that I have a mental illness. I’ll do what I can to make myself feel better. Please rememember that tomorrow is a new day. We R all here 4 U. Sending U hugs and healing ❤️‍🩹 good Karma

S

[PrinkPrincess in reply to Shnookie]

Thank you! I’m sorry to hear about your losses. I appreciate you sharing with me and giving me advice. Sending hugs and healing to you too

[Shnookie in reply to PrinkPrincess]

You R very welcome. Thank you for your kind words. We R here for each other. I’m in my late ‘ 60 and have a lot of life experience.

[Cheetahone in reply to Shnookie]

Sad to hear you miss your mom and dad. I know how hard it is. I lost my dad when I was fairly young, and I was my mom’s sole caregiver too (I even had hospice for her at home). Try thinking about the love that you had for them. LOL It’s funny and sweet but I’m sure you’ll agree that no matter how hard it was as a lone caregiver, you would still do it for a 100 more years, if you could just have them here.

Also, thanks for the info on other support options. Take care and Enjoy the last evening of 2024 and the New Year(s).

[Shnookie in reply to Cheetahone]

Thank you for your kind words. I had such a beautiful relationship with my mother. She gave me the permission and wanted me to go on with my life. She had 4 days of hospice care at home. Enjoy your New Years Eve and have a great 2025.

[Beavis2022]

I'm the same way; there's no way to plan your life when you don't know how awful you might feel at any time. I believe mine;s caused by low self-esteem. Having supporting people helps, but I don't want to burden anyone. A counselor could help' also, writing here makes you know you're not so strange, as so many people have this sad problem.

[PrinkPrincess in reply to Beavis2022]

Writing here definitely helps me get through my rough times. I believe mine is currently triggered by abandonment issues plus reoccurring stress.

[Beavis2022 in reply to PrinkPrincess]

I'm sorry to hear this. Abandonment really hurts, sometimes for a long time. Especially by family.