So much generational trauma. Why is my family always whimpering and crying? Why is everyone in my country tired of everything?

[Against_the_current]

How to heal when mom and grandma are always struggling, hysterical and complaining? And when i call a helpline or go to the doctor, they're fed up. When i ask neighbours for help, they're fed up. Dad's fed up. It really hurts to see mom and grandma suffer like that. "But you're psychologist". Yes and that's why seeing this generational trauma makes me feel i will never heal

[gajh]

You have to heal yourself first before you can help anyone else heal. You healing and getting well will have a positive effect on them. Focus on yourself.

[Against_the_current in reply to gajh]

True. I try. But they bring me down

[Alpakka123 in reply to Against_the_current]

Hi AtC,It sounds like you need to work on strengthening yourself so that they don't bring you down . I'm not going to pretend that I'm in a similar boat because I'm not, but I will say that I know what you're talking about when you say that they're bringing you down. Easier said than done I know, but try and rise above their degrading marks. I've told you that I endured narcissistic abuse, right? Narcissists are good at devaluing others. Having taken in all my person's degradations and there's a reason I have ptsd. I've had to work hard on re-building my sense of self (which I described at ond point as being totally destroyed). I've done this by looking for evidence that doesn't line up with what this person's made me believe. One of the things she's made me feel is that I don't belong in this world without mom (my mom passed away in 2021). But... looking at the evidence and I'm a cherished member of my church, I belong to a wonderful group of ladies as part of a women's club, my husband says I belong, my friends and family say i belong, etc, etc, etc. Who is right? Her, or a stack of real live evidence? I would think the latter.

You can try the same technique if you'd like. Take a statement meant to degrade you and think of real life evidence that is contrary to that statement. For example, you graduated, right? If you were made to feel that you would never graduate, the fact that you did would be a good example.

I hope this helps🙂

[Against_the_current in reply to Alpakka123]

I was thinking the same. That i need to build some resilience. Especially since i can't change them till their death and that im not well enough to leave rn

[Alpakka123 in reply to Against_the_current]

Not easy I know, but it'll serve you well in the long run to work on that.

[Starrlight]

❤️

[SoporRose]

What would healing be for you?

[Against_the_current in reply to SoporRose]

I don't know. I need this erased from my brain and myself reparent. And my family to stop behaving like 19century hysterics

[SoporRose in reply to Against_the_current]

I think you know they won't change much. Your best hope is to get away from them. I'm wishing you the best of luck.

[Alpakka123 in reply to Against_the_current]

Sorry to butt in, but what? 19th century hysterics? This I gotta see....🙂

[Teaching]

I think you can heal. It may take a long time doable.