Self-pressure

[Sandpiper14]

Hi guys,

I’m back, been gone a little while because life’s been non-stop but the pressure is real.

I am 24 years old and I have so much pressure on my shoulders right now but it’s only coming from me. My head tells me everyone else is standing around judging me and the pressure is external but I know it’s not.

I sat the toughest exams I ever sat in January and they cost so much money but I need them to progress in my chosen career. I get the results next week after waiting 6 long weeks! I am terrified and I can’t relax.

On top of this, I have my driving test tomorrow. I don’t feel confident. I feel like I won’t remember everything or il mess up. I’m a nervous driver and I’ve sat the test four times already. I feel like a failure at my age. It’s hard to not think that I might never get it.

So it’s lot for me right now and the thought of failing not one but two things, I’m not sure how I will cope?

[Hidden]

Wow you really are your toughest critic . You seem ambitious and also determined in my eyes . I do wish you luck on both tests. But even the fact you have repeated the driving exam more than once definitely shows character. Please give yourself a break your obviously trying your best x

[Sandpiper14 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you for your kind words.

I am trying my best that’s for certain and it’s difficult because sometimes I think my best still isn’t good enough. Need to try and stay resilient no matter what but not sure how far I can push myself.

[tommy2toes]

Hi There Sanpiper:

I have dealt with similar issues my whole life. The result being that I was recently diagnosed with the black dog (aka depression). The only thing I can suggest is that you try and break down what seem to be a series of insurmountable issues one by one, and then learn to love and respect yourself while being at peace with who you are as a kind and compassionate person. Beating yourself up with anxiety and worry is not worth your time or effort. I did something similar for decades and got nowhere. Take heart iand try and turn all that self-criticism into positive feelings.

t2t (tommy2toes)

[Sandpiper14]

Thank you Tommy2toes!

I regrettably didn’t pass my driving test yet again.

Some may think I’m mad but I’m going to do it again and again until I pass. It’s the pressure on the day that gets me, my instructor said if he could give me a license he has no doubt I’d just crack on but it’s the test that makes me shake and doubt myself.

If I gain anything from this year, maybe it will be resilience to keep going. And maybe that it’s ok if it doesn’t work out anyway.

[tommy2toes in reply to Sandpiper14]

Hi there sandpiper14 again:

Just take it in your stride. You cannot change the past but only live in the present. I would assume that your next driving test will not be immediate, so take a little time to relax and love yourself. Of course, in that you are still young, I appreciate that many of these challenges seem to be mountains, but when you look back on them in the future, you might well see them as mole holes. Again, love and respect yourself and do not be over critical.

t2t (tommy2toes)

[Sandpiper14 in reply to tommy2toes]

Thank you so much, I really need and appreciate these kind words right now.

[bethelbee]

You are not a failure at all! The fact you are able to keep trying in spite of things says you are definitely not a failure!! Keep going, you can do it! Wishing you the best on your exam results and the driving test.

[Sandpiper14 in reply to bethelbee]

regrettably, failed driving test. Not feeling great. Had to abandon test because I flattened the tyres on the curb! Yep awfully tragic much like the rest of my life atm.

[bethelbee in reply to Sandpiper14]

So sorry about the driver's test. Maybe wait a little while and try again. Hugs

[Sandpiper14 in reply to bethelbee]

Thank you! Got to keep moving forward I guess.