Need light to walk again

[Lovethelight]

I lost my mother as a young child and had a rough childhood, forced to work since eight years old. Never had a good role model or strong support system. Now Im a single parent left with many issues to deal with alone, after domestic violence. I have a very negative and disappointing family that only seek to serve themselves out of my efforts and put me down. I have no friends nor support around. Living in tremendous isolation from everything, unable to take the next step in my career even though I work hard. Makes me feel that no matter what I do Im destined to fail and suffer, I try to over these things but I always end up buried in pain. I want to be strong as I was once.

[litethatnevergoesout]

I want to be as strong as I once was as well. not having a good support system is difficult. I’m sorry about the domestic violence. You’ve definitely got a difficult situation. If you need to talk to someone I’m here.

[Lovethelight in reply to litethatnevergoesout]

Hi thank you for your response and support, I'm deeply thankful. I definitely wan to talk/ get advise or anything, I feel heavy not being able to share what I'm going through because the few people I talk to sometimes- family are so judgmental and to them depression and anxiety dont exist.

[Lovethelight]

Hi, this means a lot to me, I never hear support being offered to me and I really want to get well and back up, but I figure I have so much that I can't do it alone, plus to be honest I enjoy human connection, it feels my heart and reduces my negative feelings towards my past and present struggles, it motivates me, but mostly if its the right support. Thank you

[Dolphin14]

Welcome to the community. We are here to support and listen.

You have gone through so much. It's very hard to deal with when you are alone and isolated.

Do you have a therapist?

🐬

[SayNOtoPanic]

That strong person is still there. Just need to heal it a bit. Hang in there. You’re not alone. Lifting you in prayer and good vibes. 🙏🏻

[MaineOtter]

Hello Lovethelight,

I like your name! I’m so sorry for everything you have gone thru and are currently going through!

I sense your pain and isolation, I'll pray for you.

Please don’t give up, keep on fighting and trying! Life is actually worth living and people do care, we care for you, I care for you!

Some things that can help: eat healthy foods, exercise, get good regular sleep, do things you like, go out outside, try to meet people and talk with them. Help others. Pet a loving pet. Try therapy, one on one and maybe group.

Pray to Heavenly Father for help. He loves you and wants to hear from you.

[Asif_Melton]

We both have same story. I am rejected by mom after birth. She left me in hospital, my childhood was also full of tears and domestic violence, same story as your.But God is still there for us.I understand your pain, you are not alone.

Everything will be fine, stay strong and motivated.

[DodgeDhanda]

Hi LTL.

I'm so sorry U suffered & parts of ur life mirror mine & not completely though but the 1 thing I've noticed & U & some others have missed is the following.

The start in life was hard & U had to grow up before ur time & from what I read & see is that no matter what ever hurdle is thrown in ur path , U overcome it & move forward, unfortunately sometimes families can be a very hurtful hurdle but they're surely coming from the same upbringing as U !! But have been unable to deal with things the way U have.

See I too lost my mother at 4 years old & I was lucky that my dad was there for me & my siblings & it's wasn't idyllic, it was more survival mode but it's that survival mode that's helped me get over a failed marriage & raising my 2 daughters on my own & it's that survival mode that I taught my daughters too, incase there is a need where they need to put themselves first. My dad passed when I was 17 & I've been a survivor & it took me a very long time to realise it & learn to be proud of it, to others it may seem horrible but when push comes to shove ur always calm as its nothing U've not seen before.

U my friend need to start being proud of how U've survived so many obstacles in life & now ur not only working ur raising ur child/ren by urself & yes it may seem a thankless task but as kids grow & observe they will see their heroine in U & that's the reward that's waiting for U.

As for work, keep at it & carry on doing the good job ur doing & definitely stay if its a job U love as some jobs are like so good time flies & U love being there BUT if its a job for the sake of funding rent & groceries but wish to be somewhere better then look elsewhere as there is that one job that is ur calling.

So remember ur past to find that strength that U've always had & be proud of U & the hurdles that U've overcome & still standing & U've faced every hurdle face on every time & won.

Ur more than what U think U are & completely amazing too & simplest way of seeing that is how ur child/ren return ur unconditional love. U are the only person who truly knows what U've faced & conquered & always listen to her as she's never left ur side & never will. Believe in U.

I wish U love & light on ur journey.