Feeling Depressed/Anxious and burnt out on life at 55

[JWBCooper]

I'm trying to carve out a seasonal life between Mexico (Fall/Winter) and somewhere else (spring/summer). I lost a spring/summer job because of a stupid and embarrassing mistake and went through a very high anxiety period. Now I'm feeling quite depressed and my 22 yr old daughter has recently cut me off, because of my issues with depression during her childhood. I'm very lonely and feeling like it is impossible to find a partner, stressed about finances, and just unmotivated about anything right now. I'm scared because although I don't think I would ever kill myself, I have fantasies of dying or suicide as a way to escape. Depression/Anxiety for me has been on and off my entire adult life and I'm so very tired of it. I'm searching for answers. I've tried Venlafaxine, Prozac, right not I'm microdosing psilocybin, tried therapy, psychotherapy....just tired of my life Can anyone relate? I'd love to correspond with someone in a similar situation to help each other out.

[catsrock]

I'm sorry you are having such a hard time. I'm glad you came here to share. I hope things are better soon.

[JWBCooper in reply to catsrock]

Thanks for your kind words! If anything, it' just good to be heard.

[Thankfulforhelp22]

Not sure I can be of help. Depression/Anxiety is a difficult enemy to gain victory over. I have been in therapy for many years and it has helped me. I am better but with many more miles to go and I still struggle. The mental issues also make it hard to acknowledge any progress. I am glad to be in therapy but finding the right therapist for you is important and sometimes takes a while. It’s worth it to find the right one. I also take medication which can help , once again if it’s the right one for you.

I try to do anything that can make me feel better - exercise, hobbies, entertainment, getting out in nature. It helps to be in this community as well.

I know this is probably not much help but I’m praying for you. Many people on this site have some understanding of your struggle. Don’t give up ever. Mental disease can wear you down, sap your energy and worst of all make you feel hopeless. Be stubborn and don’t give in to it.

Just by posting on the site you are probably making someone else feel no so alone.

Peace and healing.

[JWBCooper in reply to Thankfulforhelp22]

Thank your for kind message! Being in this online community is helpful, just to know others struggle endlessly like I do, and to be heard with compassion.

[Bastian7]

Don't give up on counselling/psychotherapy just yet... Have a search online about the various kinds of counselling styles, and see what resonates more with you. Talking therapies can be really helpful to allow you to articulate what is going on, and dig deeper beneath the immediate reality.

Also have a look at this website - VeryWell Mind. It has lots of practical advice for many of our life difficulties. It's free, and also has an accompanying podcast. I really enjoy their newsletter.

Ultimately, there is no way around getting to know yourself intimately, and digging deeper to find the root causes for your depression and anxiety. I am on a similar journey myself. Personally, I also found Buddhist spirituality very interesting and helpful - it motivates me to keep exploring inside myself.

[JWBCooper in reply to Bastian7]

Thank you, much appreciated!

[Vasiliki99]

lot of people know how u feel of course we are right to be depressed in this ear , from the UK i always wanted to go to Mexico so I see though seasonal work is very difficult for some Kornel used to go mad about the money the jobs never giving enough and the misery of the injustice that never holds us. And yet I m just chronically ill and exhausted still I can just about manage it but only just and who says life was good it was not but was it ever I am exhausted in this life but that I have to manage I have no solutions and no real chances and no one knows --------------its like a trick that life just tricks us - partly my disease makes me depressed partly

I feel that this is not a good life or death from friends dying I do not see evidence of great heavens or great hells suppose we all love each other on some level

[Focusedmind]

I have taken Prozac and have found it helpful for my depression and OCD. My 26-year-old son, whom I also believe has OCD, is studying to obtain his master's in psychology and uses micro dosing of psilocybin to help him with his symptoms. Here in Portland, Oregon, it is legal to use this substance under the guidance of a doctor. My son is considering studying to be able to administrate this medication to others.

Tell me, do you find micro dosing of psilocybin helpful for your depression? How do you protect yourself from taking too large of a dose?