Been on antidepressants for the last 17 years.

[NaseerPDWazir]

Hi, if someone is reading this. I've been depressed for most of my life. I've tried all sorts of antidepressants etc but nothing worked except when I found my soul mate and spent a year with her. That one year was literally heaven. But then she left me suddenly without telling me anything. I tried to call her thousands of time but she had changed her number and location. At last, after 2 years I came to know that she had married. Now she is a mother of two kids. Believe me I am still waiting for her. I've also tried to meet other girls but to no avail, as I remain too depressed after she has left me. Literally I'm scared of girls approaching me as I have the constant feeling that they would also leave me after some time. I wonder if there is still any woman on this planet to be completely loyal and honest with her partner. Indeed, finding the right person is the most beautiful and wonderful thing in life.

Sorry if my post is out of place.

[Catsamaze ADAA Volunteer]

Your post is certainly not out of place!!!! This is exactly what we’re here for. I’m so sorry that she left you. Especially the way she did. But there is someone out there for you who will really be your soul mate.....one who will never leave you regardless of the ups and downs of life. Be open to that possibility and believe it. The one who left you does NOT represent everyone else. She doesn’t deserve the time and energy you continue to invest in her. Of course we grieve losses like that. But there’s something far better waiting for you.

[Imaaan]

Salam,

During the journey of life, many enter our hearts for a season, some years or a lifetime. Loosing them always brings about heartache. That said, please hold on to hope that you will find love again with a woman that is deserving of you and all that you can offer.

[beetlejuice99]

I feel this way too. It’s been over a year and some days the heartache still feels so fresh. I don’t know how to get close to anyone anymore. I’ve turned into a bit of a loaner because I’m scared of people leaving. Why am I never good enough for someone to stay.

[Bba6 in reply to beetlejuice99]

You are good enough!!! Someone is out there that will stay because you will be her everything! Do not give up! Get excited get ready to meet her. Get up, get out of bed! You want to be stronger and at your best when she comes. If you aren’t seeking you may not find. This is your life and you are strong enough to make it the best life! Do not forget that when you feel weak because that feeling will only be temporary. Get up again, you’ll be stronger every time you do!

[Lazy_dog_lover]

No, it is not out of place. Remember, though, that there are 4 billion women on the planet. I cannot speak too much of your post as I don't know the nature of how you two interacted and communicated. Sometimes, where one person sees love, the other sees stress, for example. I don't know and you don't know what was going through her mind. However, you cannot change the past. It is history. You can change your present, which will change your future. Work on being at peace with yourself. Build your courage and confidence. Take some honest looks and evaluate your half of a relationship. What are your expectations, roles, communication, non-negotiables, habits, etc. Share them with a therapist and talk about ways to improve any that are deficits and be proud of the ones worth celebrating.

Could she have panicked? Were there things not about you, but something else that made her leave? Those you may never know. Just work on you. Yes, there are women out there that will love you. Be careful how you define "completely loyal and honest", because some define that along with being obedient and always bending to the man's demands. Some will define it as 1/2 of a shared experience. Once a relationship begins, there has to be a conversation about the important parts of being in a relationship. Don't give up hope. BTW - there is nothing wrong with being single, either.