Will things ever get better? It’s been three years since I’ve been battling and it’s tiresome. In need of major support. Sigh 😔
Wondering : Will things ever get better... - Anxiety and Depre...
Wondering
52 Replies
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Things will get better 😊 I am sure of that if you need to talk I will be always here for you 😊
Hello Britt,
I have been battling depression and anxiety for my whole life. It is very tiresome and it takes a very strong person to live with these feelings...at least that is what my family always tells me. Most days I feel like I am barely hanging on. Having support is the number 1 reason why I am still here. I hope you have support. It cant always be like this and I hope you start feeling better soon. NOBODY deserves to feel this way. You are stronger than you think and you will get through this. I am here to talk whenever you want...that always helps me. Sending hugs <3
in reply to Dakota11
Awwww your comment made me cry. Thank you so much for responding. I needed to hear this. I will try to keep pushing. Thank you again. I’m going to follow you
You are in the right place for support. I just joined yesterday, and I already feel so much better. I've always known I wasn't alone in the world, but being part of this group and seeing people share stories similar to my own has been helpful.
in reply to BluePeppermint
Welcome to the family ! I’m glad you’re feeling better and have confirmation that you’re not alone.
It just HAS to get better... just keep reminding yourself of that! I've been battling for a year and know exactly how you feel. Stay strong... you've got this!
in reply to TheEmptyNest
That’s how I’ve been psyching myself out....by telling myself that things will change.
How have you been managing?
Thanks for the positive words. I appreciate your time
TheEmptyNest in reply to
I just keep pushing through... some days are better than others, but it has honestly been very hard. I just keep thinking that it will eventually get better!
in reply to TheEmptyNest
Oh ok
It does get better! Have faith that it will (I know it’s hard)
Do you go to therapy at all?
in reply to FearIsALiar
I officially start therapy next Thursday. Hopefully it will help
Hb2003 in reply to
Therapy helps a lot 😊
in reply to Hb2003
I’ll take your word for it and move forward with the idea that therapy will help me
That's a good username... fear is a liar.
I agree.
xx
It is tough journey but with a good therapist it will get better. I have battled for 40 years and there are peaks and valleys but the valleys are less deep. This pandemic has taken lots of my distractions away so for all of us this makes it tough. Write down a positive affirmations daily and create a decorative box for it so you can look at it when you need. And remember we're all here for you. Your never alone. Blessings
in reply to Kamp2020
Thanks. I will try that.
Just know you are not alone.
You are special
You are loved
You are strong
You are going to get through this
How do you battle it? What I mean is, what sort of therapy, meds, coping skills do you use?
in reply to Zhangliqun
I started therapy...I’m taking my meds. I haven’t been able to do any coping skills. No. Energy or interest to do things. I’m fighting to do basic things like showering
Zhangliqun in reply to
Do you have pleasant memories, favorite foods?
in reply to Zhangliqun
Very little...& yeah I do but some idk how to cook or it’s not healthy per say
Zhangliqun in reply to
What I'm getting at is that pleasant thoughts and memories are the nucleus of your recovery/survival/counterattack plan. Is the goodness in these things real or not? If it is not, then only the badness in the bad things is real, to which the only rational response is despair, followed quickly by self-destruction.
The only way the good things can be real is if they are somehow anchored in eternity, which is to say, yes, God. Otherwise they become just more dumb idols with feet of clay that will fall and break your heart. There is no hope to be found for anyone if you believe that we are just random collections of atoms with no purpose, coming into existence purely by chance.
Once you establish that the goodness is real (and eternal), you have a beachhead from which to launch assaults on the bad thoughts and drive them out of your mind. So whenever they come, you force yourself to force that thought out and replace it with something good, no matter how seemingly trivial. (Examples to come farther down.)
In my darkest days, I would try to sleep and each time I would be just about to drift off, a shot of adrenaline would wake me up. This would go on over and over and over and over through the night until my sheets were soaked. Those days, the winter of 1993-94, was the time I came terrifyingly close to buying a gun and eating it. But with medication, some therapy, and slowly learning to replace bad thoughts with good ones, things began to get better. Not perfect or heavenly, just better.
My first efforts at bad thought replacement were like trying to bench press a supertanker off my chest. This will happen to you and you will be tempted to quit. DO NOT. You will gain strength, you will learn how to do this. It will become second nature after a while. If you are a chronic case like me, you will still have bad days, but they will become fewer and farther between, and on the whole, less severe. Plus the knowledge that you can do this and the knowledge that these episodes will pass -- no matter how permanent they seem in the moment (don't they??) -- will comfort you and do a lot to reduce the severity of these episodes.
One of the things I would do after a completely sleepless night as described above is to -- after calling in sick, which would bring a feeling of guilt, even though I really was sick -- walk over to the hardware store and look around. For me, there is a hopeful, constructive atmosphere at a hardware store. It's filled with possibilities for improving, repairing, or even creating things and for not much money in many cases. Maybe there was something I could actually do, like replace a jacked up doorknob in the apartment. Buy a new doorknob, let's go get it done. Doing constructive things helps.
Another thing is looking at pictures on line of fall foliage, no matter what time of year. I'm a leaf-peeper and love those colors. Pick your favorites and put them in your desktop rotation. Or maybe pictures of baby bunnies. Whatever works.
And this may sound strange, but in moments of anxiety, I tend to scrunch up my shoulders and face. I've found that if I force myself to relax my shoulders and face, it's hard to still feel anxious. Of course, they'll scrunch right back up again and the anxiety will come back again but force them back down again. And again. And again. And again.
Attack on all these fronts and more.
These particular things might not work for you, but just to give you the idea of the kind of thing to look for. Different things work for different people.
I leave you with a piece of scripture, some holy psychotherapy that sums up what I have said so far, good advice for people generally but an absolute lifeline for the likes of us. Philippians 4:8:
"Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things."
If you are thinking about such things, and confident that they really are anchored in eternity, you can't also be thinking about the other things that the demons love to whisper in your ear. God be with you...
Mine didn't get better per se. It just got different. More manageable from day to day. Takes a lot of maintenance and vigilance to stay well. It's exhausting.
in reply to shodan95
What methods do you use to manage your depression from day to day? It’s very exhausting to keep up.
shodan95 in reply to
I have some basic things I make sure to do from day to day. Basic hygiene is the first thing. Then making sure I'm eating enough high quality calories. Then making sure I'm taking my medicine and drinking enough water. I journal and talk to my therapist weekly. That's pretty much all I can manage and all of that takes the edge off. It's a really basic life that lacks excitement and it's made worse by covid. It's just all I can manage right now and when I make it through a week without collapsing into a valley of despair, I celebrate it. I've seen worse and I'm grateful for even the most mundane moments of repetitive and boring peace.
Valley of despair. So familiar.
in reply to shodan95
Okay. I will try to focus on the basics for now. Thanks for sharing...it’s really helpful
I know this may sound bad, but sometimes things do get worse. Saying "things will get better" will not always help you. But knowing that you are strong enough to deal with these things is important. People who do not deal with mental health do not always know what real strength is and you definitely have it to be battling for 3 years. Even if things do not necessarily get better right away, you have the strength to get through it. Keep fighting and reach out if you need someone to talk to.
Yes! I have recently experienced this first hand. I would say I hit bottom this summer after months of living in a constant state of panic and anxiety, my body broke down physically as well. I literally worried myself sick; I was constantly nauseous, IBS, aredenals were shot, stomach acid depleted, Epstein Barr re-emergence, extreme fatigue and exhaustion. And a constant feeling of anxiety. Mainstream medicine was offering no help. Even my Pharma anxiety med was no longer working. I literally thought I was dying. It was then that I decided to seek more “unconventional” therapies. I saw a Naturopathic doctor. I spoke to a medical medium. I learned that much of my anxiety was due to physical imbalances in the gut, adrenals, and hormones. I used recommended supplements to get that all under control. I weaned off the toxic Pharma drugs. I began using the Bob Beck protocol. I learned a program called DNRS that deals with neuroplasticity or basically the ability to retrain the brain, since our brains get stuck in a limbic system loop when suffering these conditions. I am working on a Breathwork process called The Presence Process. I strengthened my spirituality. I started getting Bio-Feedback therapy. I detoxed my body and brain with a zeolite product called TRS.
And I can now say, that not only have I completely recovered physically, but I also can’t remember the last time I had a panic attack. I’m not saying these methods would work for everyone, since we’re all different, but something will work for you. Don’t be afraid to think outside the box. Mainstream medicine is more interested in keeping us sick and dependent on meds than finding the root cause and curing us. But there is an underlying cause, and once found, can be cured. Toxins/ heavy metals in the brain for example, can be a cause, and we get these from so many sources; fish is full of mercury, if you eat or drink from anything aluminium you absorb it. If you get vaccines you’re loaded with toxins and heavy metals. We’re not meant to just have these conditions. They signify an underlying cause. You are not your diagnosis. Just because western (Pharma controlled) medicine wants to hang a label on you and say “you have anxiety disorder and that’s just how you’ll always be, so take this drug for the rest of your (shortened) life” doesn’t mean you have to accept it. There is hope, there are other options, keep seeking and you will find your cure.
I feel the same way at times. I hope things get better for you.
Yes, I understand. I'm tired of struggling.
Yes, it will get better. Seek medical care if you haven't already. The meds help so much. Also therapy. I wish you all the best!
It does and it doesn’t. I have been battling for 10 years, and it has gotten better with treatment, but it also never goes away. It helps me to channel my thoughts and feelings into something (writing/painting, school, excercise)
in reply to Elle_Luv
I love writing but I have no energy to do anything
Elle_Luv in reply to
Ah that’s always the worst. It helps me to start with a shower or a walk and trying to keep thoughts at bay. Try journaling! It doesn’t have to be good, or bad. It’s just a way to get your thoughts out! Set a timer for five minutes of writing. If you’re feeling good keep going! If not try drinking coffee or tea!
in reply to Elle_Luv
Okay. I will try your recommendations...thanks for sharing !!
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