Wedding worries and mum passing

[Afrohair]

Hi I just feel like I need to vent on here my mum is in her 50s and was diagnosed about 4 years ago with a condition called vascular dementia in that time I have got engaged and found out to have my own sickness in the past year which sadly has no cure but isn’t life threatening my wedding is booked in June but I feel so poorly these days and might need an operation which is a year wait.ive not planned any of my wedding and The worry I have is I really want to get married before my mum dies but I’m so poorly and I want to be happy but I want my mum to be on the photos etc but I keep worrying if I keep postponing what if my mum dies before the wedding I won’t have that memory and she Dosent want to not be in her right mind for it I’m sure she already has problems forgetting but it’s not as bad as it could get but I’ve been so sick it’s like at the same time I just want to get myself better docs have said an op might help for a short time on top of all this in September I lost my baby and I really can’t think straight any more I don’t feel anything but emptiness I’m not on any meds for it I feel like I already take 10 other vitamins and tablets a day for my other condition but I just so want to just feel better in myself my body hurts so much all the time

[Mrspjsmom]

Perhaps you could plan a small ceremony with just family and close friends then have a bigger celebration when you are up to it. My Mom died suddenly when I was 22. Ironically on the evening she found out I was engaged. My father suffered from early onset dementia and passed away when I was 33. My son has some memories of my Dad since he was seven when Dad passed away. My daughter was only three and has no memory of him. He had become violent in the nursing home so I only took my daughter to see him once before he was bedridden for safety reasons. My heart goes out to you. Not having my Mom at my wedding was difficult. I know you will make the right decision for you. Once you decide don't look back and don't let anyone question you. HUGS and BLESSINGS!

[Afrohair in reply to Mrspjsmom]

Thankyou for your comments we were thinking to maybe do a small wedding now it’s just me feeling poorly every day is really affecting my mood in planning anything at all although I’ve made some kind of start it was going to be a church wedding now we are thinking small registery.I really can’t imagine her not being there cause this is also her dream as well as mine

[Mrspjsmom in reply to Afrohair]

It will work out and I'm sure you will come up with a solution.

[Afrohair in reply to Mrspjsmom]

I can’t help worrying about the future I know I should take it day by day but I always struggle with the unknown

[Mrspjsmom in reply to Afrohair]

Sometimes I take things day by day. Other times hour by hour or even minute to minute.

[Afrohair]

Strange?i don’t understand what’s strange? .thankyou for your comment but I posted it a while ago my ive decided to go away and get married somewhere my mum can come and local to me and cancelled the church wedding which vicor is fine with as we had that all booked.i already have my dress it’s lovely and white with lace and beaded detail on the trail it also has silk flowers with beads and diamanté’s much of it hand sewn.just worried if I will now fit into it as I’ve lost weight I’m hoping so thanks again

[GuseinGasanov in reply to Afrohair]

I don't understand why make a big holiday if you can just celebrate with your family and close friends. The main thing is that there are only the closest people. Or just go on vacation instead of a wedding. It will be cheaper and better. My wife and I didn't even buy wedding suits. I had the most standard party clothes: white shirt, black jeans, black sneakers. And we bought a simple but beautiful dress for my wife:

magiclinen.com/linen-clothi...

That being said, everything was very good. The day after the wedding, my wife and I flew to Bali. And it was wonderful. I have never been so happy. I think you should make this holiday the way you want and not how it should be in the opinion of the public.

[Afrohair in reply to GuseinGasanov]

Hi not sure your aware but this was posted a while ago now the previous comment was deleted as I was told what dress to buy when I already have a dress I’ve chosen. Ivory is not my colour! and then you’ve commented telling me to go on holiday instead of getting married which I find absurd please think before you comment especially when it involves people’s lives I was asking for advice on my mum who has dimentia and was worried about her passing away and when I should get married so she can see it all not never get married at all I love my partner and want to spend the rest of my life with him so it’s money well spent which is close family being me my husband kids and mother at the wedding I don’t have any other family !