I want a girlfriend so badly

[BrettS119]

Let me clear the air by saying I am not intending to use this post to find a date. I just want to share something I'm sensitive about.

My social need is very, very minimal. I don't ever hang out with friends because I have none. I've always been perfectly fine with that. But a very minimal need is not the same thing as no need at all. I'm only looking to build one new relationship. I'm looking for a girl.

The problem is I have no idea how I'm going to get one. I'm not the kind of person that will go to a bar and try to hit on chicks the whole time. I've thought about online dating, but I don't know how to sell myself to someone else. And I'm also pretty damn nervous.

I have pretty high standards, I'll admit it. But I cannot and will not lower them. I'm not desperate enough to just date someone for the sake of having that relationship. I want it to mean something. I want someone beautiful. I want someone I can be comfortable around and break down with when I need to.

I just don't know where to go from here.

[Hidden]

I would discourage dating online. It seems so empty and for one thing only. I know others have found love but my son has done this and told me what it was all about. You have to get out even if by yourself. You can meet people at the grocery store, library, museums, parks. Put yourself out there. Also friends can help. I met my husband through a blind date. Even family can help if they know someone. High standards are good but remember good women come in all kinds of packages and you don't want to miss out on someone great because of hair color or even weight. Real love is worth more than that and looks will change. I promise you that. Good luck!

[Lovely_Lizzy_ in reply to Hidden]

I disagree I mean you should try to get out of the house, but love can be found in any place and I think online is one of the best places to connect with others easily, so i think that online dating could turn out to be a great opportunity, just an opinion ❤️

[Lovely_Lizzy_]

You seem like quite a stand up guy tbh, and I think that you should just be yourself, I know cheesiest advice in the book, but even though ur probably nervous as heck, I think if u just showed ur true sensitive sweet self than it will be no problem getting a girl, girls would die for a sweet guy cause there aren’t many left, you just gotta find the right girl. Hope u find the perfect lady❤️

[hypercat54]

Hi the best way to meet girls is socially through other friends and getting out and about. I am not knocking online dating but have never experienced it so it might work as long as you are careful.

I remember once as a spotty late teenager really fancying this guy, but he told me he only goes out with pretty girls! He was nothing to look at himself so he was expecting a lot. He really missed out on a lovely person, but I didn't miss out on him as he was obviously very shallow.

I think people with high standards forget sometimes that women also have high standards and do you think you would qualify as someone who meets their lists? x

[MYNN]

I understand and agree with what you are saying. Sometimes, special people appear unexpectedly. We can't feel chemistry with just anyone no matter how good-looking, smart, or nice they are. When I have convinced myself to date, It has gone terribly wrong. Rejection hurts, but having to tell someone else you're not into them hurts just as much. All we can do is be patient and have hope.

[Hidden]

I'm free if you want friendly support

[Lulu02]

Mate I get you, I’ve gone through a lot with my past/first relationship except I still feel this urge to have that person I can talk to 24/7. Once you know the feeling all you do is long for someone like that again even if they were the worst thing that has happened to you. I’m only young and have plenty of time but I still wish from time to time of having a boyfriend.

[Lulu02 in reply to Lulu02]

Also I say keep those expectations high but don’t necessarily think to find those expectations in the person you expected.

[Hidden]

You aren’t ready yet. If you look at what you wrote. You simply want to have a relationship as a personal goal. Relationships aren’t a goal to be achieved. They come about organically. No one is entitled to one. What you think you deserve in a mate isn’t necessarily what you need. You need to just go and live life. The relationship will come about naturally.