Strength to Go!!!

[gfranklin12]

Good morning,

Earlier this week doing my therapy session, I indicated to my therapist, that I joined a on line support group, and he felt it was a great idea to communicate with others who are dealing with some of the same issues as myself. Will, after telling him about the amazing responses, and feedback from others concerning the lost of my daughter, he was very proud of me for having the courage to reach out, and share my store😊😊😊!!! "I locked myself away for 7 years before ever sharing my store outside to others... too painful." He also loved one of the post indicating that I should honor my daughter's life and all that she accomplished before going home to our Lord and Savior. He gives me weekly task to do... like homework assignments, and I attempt to do them the best I can. Well. one task was to post something positive about my daughter, and tell a story about one of her greatest accomplishments. So, here I go to visit her, and take a picture of her final resting place here on earth, and post it along with a story. I feel the anxiety, and stress building up, and didn't sleep at all last night!!! I have to travel 4 hours, and to another state to visit her resting site, and it's so hard everytime!!! I also have a friend that helps me through these painful visits, and encourages me to also look all the awesome side of my daughter's life!!! Please help me gain the strength to go and see my baby...

Thank you

[Hidden]

Very difficult, very very sad story. I am so sad to read your story. I can relate however I have had family and friends who have passed suddenly, way before their time. Shocked, disbelief, can't believe, don't want to believe. I don't want to accept, my mind can't, won't accept, process this insane, horrific event. This is, was not a event. This is, was a person. A precious little one, your little one. You have the right to be sad, mad, shocked, in disbelief. Accepting feels like saying "goodbye". You will never, ever say goodbye to your baby, that is impossible. That is the truth. You can go through the 5 steps of the grieving process but, no matter what. You, I would, will not ever say "goodbye". All we can do, is what your therapist mentioned. Honor our baby, our loved ones. Cry, miss them forever and think of them always. Remembering their fun, their not so fun, their spirit. Their alive body is no longer here however their alive spirit will, is still alive in us. They are always with us. My mothers grave site is 10,000 miles away. She died before her time. I rarely get to visit her graveside but she is always with me. I did, do what your therapist mentioned. I honor her as much as possible. Birthdays, a special something that we loved to do together. Holidays, her favorite holiday memories. I would, continue to do so. Share her stories with my family and friends. I will never say goodbye. Our loved ones are always with us. We have to move forward, that's life. That's what life dictates. We can't, won't, don't want to however we have to. You are not alone, many of us understand and many can empathize your journey. Your daughter is with you, always

[gfranklin12 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you so very much for such kind and encouraging words!!! This has made my day!!!

God Bless You!!!

[KrierandRosie]

That is so sad. Do you mind telling what happened to her? Death is so hard to face. Do you have others in your life to hold onto? I have a husband and two huskies. No family. It can be lonely. Each day is a struggle. Some things take time to get over. Sometimes the bad never goes away. I am happier if I sleep ok and don’t feel nausea.

[gfranklin12 in reply to KrierandRosie]

Just having folks like yourself helps me gain the strength to go!!! Bless you!!!

[kenster1]

hi I am proud of you for attending the therapy and opening up.i am proud of you that you reached out to us as well.more so though you should be proud of yourself your story really hit me.i am happy that you have aa friend that you can rely on they must be special indeed.four hours may feel a lot in terms of travel but when you arrive that all gets forgotten.i don't think in 19 years ive ever missed a birthday Christmas or anniversary spending that hour or two at the graveside gives me reassurance that he is at peace.thinking of you take care and god bless.

[gfranklin12 in reply to kenster1]

Thank you my friend... God Bless you also with your journey toward recovery.

[Catwoman2018]

Thank you for sharing with us and telling us about the very sad loss of your daughter. My heart breaks for you. I hope you find the strength to keep making your journey, you are strong and your faith will guide you. I also told my doctor about joining this community, giving support and receiving it. She was so happy and said everyone who goes to her for help with anxiety and depression, she will recommend this site. I have received amazing support here since losing my mum. Sending love and hugs to you and will say a special prayer. xx

[gfranklin12 in reply to Catwoman2018]

Thank you love, and I am here for you also😊😊😊!!!